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  • THURSDAY MARCH 6 2008 6:00 AM

John McShit

I feel like with all the attention surrounding the Democratic primary, we have forgotten how horrible John McCain is as a potential president. Holy fucking shit is he bad. Seriously wrong about everything. A few months ago, I wrote a Pulitzer Award winning article titled, "Fuck John McCain." Now I am forced to update the list of reasons to not vote for this nearly dead creature and I have written an article with an equally genius and witty title.

Last week, Grandpa Ancient received the endorsement of crazy Texas evangelical pastor John Hagee. Hagee is the pure physical form of awful. He hates everything and loves to talk about it. Check out his beautiful description of the Catholic Church.



Ha ha. Good times. I totally want to invite this guy to a barbeque. Hagee was an endorsement McCain worked very hard to get. He did everything but blow Mr. Lunatic and it apparently worked. Kudos, Johnny, you’re in bed with pure hate.

A few years ago, John The Elder hated the religious right, now he loves them. The McCain of 1999 is dead. He was hollowed out and filled with the loving spirit of George Bush. From issue to issue, he has morphed to align with the worst president in the history of the United States.



Like most people, Time Worn McCain wants the George Bush economy to keep rolling on. Why wouldn’t he? This shit is awesome!


Behind the scenes, his campaign is searching for ways to pay for Sen. McCain's tax proposals. In addition to extending the Bush tax cuts, the 71-year-old candidate would slash the corporate income-tax rate from 35% to 25% at a cost to the Treasury of $100 billion a year, estimates Mr. Holtz-Eakin.

In all, his tax-cutting proposals could cost about $400 billion a year, according to estimates of the impact of different tax cuts by CBO and the McCain campaign. The cost will make it difficult for him to achieve his goal of balancing the budget by the end of his first term.


Oh, fuck yes! Why pay for anything? This fucker will keep on running with a totally unsound economic policy. Money out, no money in. What could go wrong? And the Time Worn Airman will also keep on keeping on with Bush’s fantastically unsuccessful Social Security plan.


“I’m totally in favor of personal savings accounts,” he says. When reminded that his Web site says something different, he says he will change the Web site. “As part of Social Security reform, I believe that private savings accounts are a part of it — along the lines that President Bush proposed.”


Shit yeah. Why would you want to separate yourself from the least popular president since the one who had to resign? Good work. May we call you Old Failure now, or later?




But, at least McCain has experience. And that’s what we need right now.


In early 1987, at the beginning of his first Senate term, McCain attended two meetings with federal banking regulators to discuss an investigation into Lincoln Savings and Loan, an Irvine, Calif., thrift owned by Arizona developer Charles Keating. Federal auditors were investigating Keating's banking practices, and Keating, fearful that the government would seize his S&L, sought intervention from a number of U.S. senators.

Keating raised money for McCain's two congressional campaigns in 1982 and 1984, and for McCain's 1986 Senate bid. By 1987, McCain campaigns had received $112,000 from Keating, his relatives, and his employees--the most received by any of the Keating Five.


In February 1991, the Senate Ethics Committee found McCain and guilty of nothing more than "poor judgment." He gave $112,000 to the US Treasury. Experience!

Mr. Barely Alive also authored an amendment that allowed companies making US military equipment to move jobs out of America. Yay! Go foreign countries! In 2003, McCain came up with this gem of an amendment.


S. 1050—Buy American rules traditionally have required that most U.S. military equipment, defense systems and components be manufactured in the United States. An amendment to the FY 2004 U.S. Department of Defense authorization bill weakened the Buy American requirements. The amendment, offered by Sen. John McCain (R–Ariz.), exempted defense goods from six European countries from Buy American requirements. It passed May 21, 2003, 50–48.


Hmm, I wonder what that will lead to...


The Air Force on Friday delivered a shock to storied American airplane builder The Boeing Co. by choosing a team of Northrop Grumman Corp. and Airbus parent EADS to build a new fleet of air-to-air refueling tankers -- a contract potentially worth $100 billion.


Grandpa Time responded to the contract by saying, “military decisions should not be about creating jobs.” Fuck, yeah. Hopefully you will keep America safe by taking away all our jobs. The number of Americans jobs that would have been created by the Boeing contract was 44,000. That’s 44,000 jobs the Old Man has already cost Americans – and he’s not even president yet.

Thankfully, Oldy McOlderson can run on the incredible success of the surge.


The U.S. has not only added 30,000 more troops in Iraq — it has essentially bribed the opposition, arming the very Sunni militants who only months ago were waging deadly assaults on American forces. To engineer a fragile peace, the U.S. military has created and backed dozens of new Sunni militias, which now operate beyond the control of Iraq's central government. The Americans call the units by a variety of euphemisms: Iraqi Security Volunteers (ISVs), neighborhood watch groups, Concerned Local Citizens, Critical Infrastructure Security. The militias prefer a simpler and more dramatic name: They call themselves Sahwa, or "the Awakening."


Great. This sounds like the perfect idea. Create a government, then create and arm opposing militias within the same country. And keep the money rolling in! That way everything appears to be okay.


"The only reason anything works or anybody deals with us is because we give them money," says a young Army intelligence officer. The 2nd Squadron, 2nd Stryker Cavalry Regiment, which patrols Osama's territory, is handing out $32 million to Iraqis in the district, including $6 million to build the towering walls that, in the words of one U.S. officer, serve only to "make Iraqis more divided than they already are." In districts like Dora, the strategy of the surge seems simple: to buy off every Iraqi in sight. All told, the U.S. is now backing more than 600,000 Iraqi men in the security sector — more than half the number Saddam had at the height of his power.


Fucking awesome. This is what White Hair is running on. This is the big feather in The Decaying Man’s hat. Giving our old enemies tons of cash and weapons to prepare for a future war against the new "government" we put in place.


Only months ago, members of the Awakening were planting IEDs and ambushing U.S. soldiers. They were snipers and assassins, singing songs in honor of Fallujah and fighting what they viewed as a war of national liberation against the foreign occupiers. These are men the Americans described as terrorists, Saddam loyalists, dead-enders, evildoers, Baathists, insurgents. There is little doubt what will happen when the massive influx of American money stops: Unless the new Iraqi state continues to operate as a vast bribing machine, the insurgent Sunnis who have joined the new militias will likely revert to fighting the ruling Shiites, who still refuse to share power.

"We are essentially supporting a quasi-feudal devolution of authority to armed enclaves, which exist at the expense of central government authority," says Chas Freeman, who served as ambassador to Saudi Arabia under the first President Bush. "Those we are arming and training are arming and training themselves not to facilitate our objectives but to pursue their own objectives vis-a-vis other Iraqis. It means that the sectarian and ethnic conflicts that are now suppressed are likely to burst out with even greater ferocity in the future."


Remember what happened to Yugoslavia after the communist country fell apart? That’s going to look like a blip compared to the number of countries and people who will be sucked into a Sunni Shiite religious war. McCain and Bush pushed the surge only to quiet Iraq down until another Republican could be elected to the presidency. It’s a colossal fucking disaster, more so than at any other time. During this quiet “successful” time in Iraq, we have been creating the ultimate future nightmare. John Prehistoric McCain was the man pushing it the whole time. Good work, douchebag.

 

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Comments
401kboy

401kboy

Woodbridge, NJ
May 2007

MAR 06, 2008 08:01 PM

coyotemike said:

401kboy said:
"His wife Carol accepted a divorce in February of 1980,[52] and the uncontested divorce occurred on April 2, 1980.[19] The settlement included two houses, and financial support for her ongoing medical treatments resulting from the 1969 automobile accident; they would remain on good terms."

there is always another side to the story.



And often there is a link. Where did you find this?



wikipedia, and yes, I read the linked references.

RandomNerd

RandomNerd

I'm lost
January 2005

MAR 06, 2008 08:06 PM

coyotemike said:

scrillamanilla said:

Kindle said:
It's love.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)






Someone should tell them that's not the Conservative Republican way.



I'll raise your McCain/Bush with McCain/Clinton:

zoom image

QUICK! WHO LOVES MCCAIN MORE?!?



Is it just me, or does McCain look like he has a comb-over?



If only that was the most pressing concern...

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

USA
May 2006

MAR 06, 2008 08:07 PM

RandomNerd said:

coyotemike said:

scrillamanilla said:

Kindle said:
It's love.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)






Someone should tell them that's not the Conservative Republican way.



I'll raise your McCain/Bush with McCain/Clinton:

zoom image

QUICK! WHO LOVES MCCAIN MORE?!?



Is it just me, or does McCain look like he has a comb-over?



If only that was the most pressing concern...



Not a pressing concern. Just an observation.

defaultx

defaultx

I'm lost
February 2006

MAR 06, 2008 08:09 PM

MCBudweiser pimp of arizona.

RandomNerd

RandomNerd

I'm lost
January 2005

MAR 06, 2008 08:11 PM

coyotemike said:

RandomNerd said:

coyotemike said:
Is it just me, or does McCain look like he has a comb-over?



If only that was the most pressing concern...



Not a pressing concern. Just an observation.



Not an accusation. Just a lament.

ckdexterhaven

ckdexterhaven

USA
December 2005

MAR 06, 2008 08:22 PM

He's old! lol!

AmbientLight

AmbientLight

I'm lost
March 2005

MAR 06, 2008 08:41 PM

Kindle said:

phrogg said:
With this article, I'm starting a roster of John McCain nicknames! biggrin


Johnny McDubya!



McCheesy

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

USA
May 2006

MAR 06, 2008 08:44 PM

Mayor McCheese.

RandomNerd

RandomNerd

I'm lost
January 2005

MAR 06, 2008 08:46 PM

McBeth.

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

USA
May 2006

MAR 06, 2008 08:46 PM

McMimes stole my reply.

abbazappa

abbazappa

Sacramento, CA
June 2006

MAR 06, 2008 10:19 PM

scrillamanilla said:

Kindle said:
It's love.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)






Someone should tell them that's not the Conservative Republican way.



I'll raise your McCain/Bush with McCain/Clinton:


QUICK! WHO LOVES MCCAIN MORE?!?



I will raise your McCain/Bush and McCain/Clinton with a McCain/Obama:

The new cool thing is McCain combos.

Kindle

Kindle

Houston, TX
March 2006

MAR 06, 2008 10:39 PM

abbazappa said:

scrillamanilla said:

Kindle said:
It's love.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)






Someone should tell them that's not the Conservative Republican way.



I'll raise your McCain/Bush with McCain/Clinton:


QUICK! WHO LOVES MCCAIN MORE?!?



I will raise your McCain/Bush and McCain/Clinton with a McCain/Obama:

The new cool thing is McCain combos.


Yeah but Bush and Billary look happy to be with McCain. Obama just looks annoyed, and rightfully so. I would be, too, and with a slightly disgusted face.

abbazappa

abbazappa

Sacramento, CA
June 2006

MAR 06, 2008 10:52 PM

Kindle said:

abbazappa said:

scrillamanilla said:

Kindle said:
It's love.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)






Someone should tell them that's not the Conservative Republican way.



I'll raise your McCain/Bush with McCain/Clinton:


QUICK! WHO LOVES MCCAIN MORE?!?



I will raise your McCain/Bush and McCain/Clinton with a McCain/Obama:

The new cool thing is McCain combos.


Yeah but Bush and Billary look happy to be with McCain. Obama just looks annoyed, and rightfully so. I would be, too, and with a slightly disgusted face.



or he wasn't celebrating and was busy get work done with McCain *shrug* its pretty easy to find pictures of one old member of congress celebrating with another politician that has been around for a while. I think those pictures of McCain and Bush where from the Party Convention where he pretty much had to congradulate Bush and act happy to stay in his hard earn position of being in the inner ring of the party.

SergeantPsycho

SergeantPsycho

USA
January 2007

MAR 07, 2008 02:09 AM

Stiles said:

SergeantPsycho said:
Why? Because if corporations get to keep more of their money, those savings will find their way to the general public some how.



Pure comedy gold. ExxonMobil reports the highest corporate profits ever in its' history and oil prices are the highest in the history of the US, yet gasoline is also near all time record highs.

So much for that theory!



Perhaps gas prices wouldn't be so high if the goverment didn't instist at taxing you at the pump, and as stated earlier, throwing the money on wasteful spending. As for the profits of ExxonMobil, i think it's better to look at profit margins rather than actual profits, as getting that gas to the pump ain't cheap. The profits they do make go towards building new refineries, searching for new sources of oil, etc, in order to keep up with ever increasing demand.

abbazappa

abbazappa

Sacramento, CA
June 2006

MAR 07, 2008 02:44 AM

SergeantPsycho said:

Stiles said:

SergeantPsycho said:
Why? Because if corporations get to keep more of their money, those savings will find their way to the general public some how.



Pure comedy gold. ExxonMobil reports the highest corporate profits ever in its' history and oil prices are the highest in the history of the US, yet gasoline is also near all time record highs.

So much for that theory!



Perhaps gas prices wouldn't be so high if the goverment didn't instist at taxing you at the pump, and as stated earlier, throwing the money on wasteful spending. As for the profits of ExxonMobil, i think it's better to look at profit margins rather than actual profits, as getting that gas to the pump ain't cheap. The profits they do make go towards building new refineries, searching for new sources of oil, etc, in order to keep up with ever increasing demand.



thing is we need to stop the hate on Exxon Mobil, the CEO's only own less them 1% of the company, the largest share holders are people and then companies that buy Exxon's stock for retirement funds which help the people. So people can yell all they want about how evil Exxon Mobil is for being capitalistic but it is helping the people. We only have our self's to blame for the raise in price.

Oil companies don't set the price of oil per the barrel that is the different nations that sell their oil. Also since Saudi Arabia decided to put the price of oil on the value of the dollar every time the Feds cut interest rates the value of the dollar goes down which makes the price of oil go up. That is what will account for the jump of gas recently since every one turned to the feds to have them cut interest rates because of the falling housing bubble so in a since its a big circle jerk.

Another thing is the last time we updated any of our own oil refineries was back in the 70's. This makes them inefficient and are about to dry up and no one is looking for new oil here in America. The few times they try to drill for more oil people protest and make a big stink of it (California Coast Lines and Alaska for example) and then they complain about the price of oil. We can't have our cake and eat it too.

We also really limit the oil companies in being aggressive and buying as much oil as they can, China and India are out buying us and they don't mind paying extra to do so. Bio-fuel and ethanol at this point is fools fuel and we really do need to start buying as much oil as we can since nothing in the near future is replacing it and it is so important to keep things going.

In the end I don't see much hope in the future for oil prices. Our money keeps loosing value, environmentalists will try to stop all new drilling, Saudi Arabia wont pump any more then they are, Venezuela is threatening to cut us off and now Canada just stated they will stop all sale of oil to us if we get out of NAFTA and they are our biggest supplier. And boo McCain and this isn't directed at any one in particular just adding my 2 cents in since people started talking about ExxonMobil.

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