BLOG VIEW | HEADLINE VIEW

ALL

GEEK

Al Qaeda Rides Harleys And Starts Fires!

FRIDAY OCTOBER 26 2007 9:00 AM

Submitted by FearTheReaper. Edited By FearTheReaper.

TAGS: Fox News, al Qaeda, Terrorism California Fires"

Fox News is obviously only for the borderline retarded. The entire network is a joke and has repeatedly been caught lying. In polls, its viewers are always the least knowledgeable when it comes to facts. The network is constantly breeding a race of loud, overbearing, ignorant Americans filled with pride. I'm sure a couple will blather incoherently in the comments section of this story, with no clue as to how stupid they actually are.

The latest example of Fox's terrible reporting occurred in the last couple of days, when the idiots at Fox News hinted that al Qaeda started the Southern California fires.

I�ve heard about some people talk about this.

Oh, good, then say it on the air. This is the greatest example of something a journalist should never say. A news anchor should never say it. A reporter should never say it. A fucking weatherman should never say it. How about a shred of integrity and responsibility?

The allegations were made up and made on Fox & Friends, a morning show that helps idiots to wake up with fear. Fox & Friends made the claim on Wednesday, and Fox News followed it up on Thursday, even after much Internet and media ridicule. The FBI memo they refer to is four years old, not a few months, as the anchors would have you believe.

Left unsaid by the Fox news-reader was that the FBI warning was sent more than four years ago, described a potential plot that made no mention of California, could not be proven accurate and did not raise alarms from forest-fire officials at the time. (Such caveats all were included in an Associated Press report on the warning at the time.)

Proof and evidence are not enough to stop the incredible reporters at Fox News. There is a story there and they are going to find it even if they have to make it up. On Thursday, they dug deeper into the not real story. (Scroll to the bottom for the amazing video)

How do they determine what's arson and what's terrorism?

That�s a good question and one you should ask yourself before you go blathering about it on national television. Thankfully, a Fox News terror analyst was there to calm down the crazy talk.

�In a post-9/11 world, we have to consider all possibilities," Stakelbeck intoned. �The fires appear to be the result of a coordinated effort ... over a large area."

Uh, no, not at all. The Santa Ana winds are here. The winds blow very hot air out of the desert, down the mountains and into Los Angeles. Combine the winds with a parched environment due to a drought and you have the perfect conditions for fire. Oh, and arsonist wait with their boners to start fires during the Santa Anas. But what do I know, I've only lived in California my entire life. Fox would know that if they had hired the correct analyst for this segment, they are called meteorologists.

Even if this doesn�t fit the al Qaeda, Jihadi profile, I still consider this, personally, an act of domestic terrorism. It�s affecting women, children, innocents�

Right. Fires are domestic terrorism. That is why arsonists have to register as sex criminals, because they are terrorists. And it is affecting women, children and innocents. Know why? Because it�s a FUCKING FIRE, asshole.

I think now would be a good time to define terrorism.

The calculated use of violence (or the threat of violence) against civilians in order to attain goals that are political or religious or ideological in nature; this is done through intimidation or coercion or instilling fear.

Well, someone is definitely instilling fear in civilians. Sadly, it�s a news channel. Terrorists generally like to take credit for their acts, because it scares the shit out of people. But with Fox News around, they never have to!

What a cost-effective means of terrorism. Really all you need is some matches, kerosene and a lighter and look at what you can do.

Yahoo, look what you can do! Do you need to go rub one out, weirdo? Seriously, why are you so excited about the damage that can be caused with such simple supplies?

Is the FBI going to move in and start trying to figure out if he was operating alone or if he was operating with al Qaeda?

No. They are going to take note of the giant erection in his pants when he was caught and chalk it up to arson.

Thanks for once again being the most embarrassing and pathetic news source on the planet Fox.

53 Comments

PAGE:

1 | 2 | 3 | 4

imclever

Kent, WA

February 2007

OCT 26, 2007 10:49 PM

Since the Japanese once planned to start massive fires on the West Coast by using incendiary bomb laden balloons during WWII, perhaps Fox News should be reporting that the Japanese are at fault.

No?

Oh well. It was worth a try.

They probably all failed history anyway.

FellOnEarth

Temecula, CA

April 2006

OCT 27, 2007 01:29 AM

Allegedly, Fox (News Corp) has been utilizing it's media outlets to broadcast secret coded messages that are designed to brainwash it's listeners and viewers... The signal origin has reportedly been located somewhere within the rectal region of their reptilian overlords and is attuned to same biorhythmic frequency in human brains to induce simple-mindedness. Allegedly.

In other words. If you watch Fox TV, you probably have shit for brains.

I found another subtle similarity on ABC news and 20/20 the night before Bush's visit (when the fires would eventually begin to subside). Every time they mentioned our dear leader's name (Bush) , they immediately followed with images of firefighters heroism and matching commentary. I thought I was just being cynical, but sure enough, like clockwork they kept on doing it throughout the program. From my observations, I couldn't help concluding that there was a concerted effort to try and use the disaster for PR purposes.

It wouldn't be the first time:

Nor will it be the last:

Sorry the images don't fit, just right-click to view full image.

FellOnEarth

Temecula, CA

April 2006

OCT 27, 2007 02:46 AM

Your tax dollars, hard at work.

Oh, I forgot to mention, FEMA was all over this disaster like flies on shit:

Wow, too bad the FEMA "news" conference aired on Faux News was a fake!
FEMA is more concerned about managing their own disasters instead of the real ones, and they can't even get that right!

The White House's severe hand slapping of FEMA in response to their naughty little propaganda stunt is pure gold.

It's not a practice we would employ here at the White House. We certainly don't condone it. We didn't know about it beforehand [...] I'm sure they will not do it again

FEMA Deputy Administrator, Harvey Johnson, is soooo fired.

Mr_Mocata

United Kingdom

OLD SKOOL

OCT 27, 2007 07:37 AM

FearTheReaper said:
In polls, its viewers are always the least knowledgeable when it comes to facts.

Unfortunately, it would seem that they are rather knowledgeable when it comes to falsehoods!

grrowler

Sarasota, FL

October 2007

OCT 27, 2007 07:43 AM

sadly next time you guys see your parents/grandparents (depending on how old they are and how much time they have), they'll be adamant that these ARE terrorist attacks and that they're getting suspicious about their neighbor's strange evening visitors and raucous bbq parties. (lol, or at least, that's what my grandma is like) imo the networks cater this crap to old people and get them all riled up so they buy "terrorist attack supplies" and "terrorist hurricane kits"

/sigh

Mr_Mocata

United Kingdom

OLD SKOOL

OCT 27, 2007 07:50 AM

PS Can you imagine Osama Bin Laden on the back of a Harley?

He'd become an overnight pin-up for anti-Western revolutionaries and teen rebels.

We've all seen that famous portrait of Che Guevera on T-shirts, plastered on the walls of student bedrooms and even staring back from the labels of bottles of cola.

Che Guevera has become a marketing execs dream come true!

I know its a bit of a strange thought, but just imagine it...with the right ad campaign Harley Bin Laden could be the next poster child of middle class teen rebels all over the globe.

Virtute

Brooklyn, NY

July 2007

OCT 27, 2007 11:32 AM

legionnaire said:
the collapse of the Cleveland Indians in the AL playoff series

Okay the line has finally been crossed. I'm enlisting.

adam_vincent

San Francisco, CA

November 2002

OCT 27, 2007 11:44 AM

RudieCantFail said:

legionnaire said:
You know, I heard that al-Qaeda was also responsible for the development of nuclear weapons, hurricane Katrina, the ascent of the Nazis to power in the 1930s, the collapse of the Cleveland Indians in the AL playoff series, and the Macarena. I think we can all connect the dots and see what has to be done - stay the course in Iraq.

Does that kind of hard-hitting reporting qualify me to be on Fox news?

True fact: It was al-Quaeda that let the dogs out.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

PAGE:

1 | 2 | 3 | 4