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  • TUESDAY SEPTEMBER 11 2007 9:00 AM

Whores Totally Cool, Gay Stuff Not So Much

Submitted by FearTheReaper

Edited by erin_broadley

Tags: David Craig, Larry Craig, Larry Flynt, Republicans



Remember Senator David Vitter? A few weeks ago we learned that he used to spend time banging hookers. The Louisiana Senator apologized for “a very serious sin in his past.” What he meant was that he was having sex with a prostitute and, according to phone records, was even calling the DC Madam while he was on the House floor making votes.


This was a very serious sin in my past for which I am, of course, completely responsible. Several years ago, I asked for and received forgiveness from God and my wife in confession and marriage counseling. Out of respect for my family, I will keep my discussion of the matter there - with God and them. But I certainly offer my deep and sincere apologies to all I have disappointed and let down in any way.


Of course, his fellow Republican lawmakers let it slide. No slap on the wrist for Vitter. And why should they? He apologized to them and to God. Also, the statue of limitations had passed, so he was free and clear. How does one respond to a religious man who spent his years trying to legislate morality and then gets caught screwing hookers? His fellow Republicans gave him a standing ovation upon his return to the Senate. That is some quality douchebaggery, there.

Now, lets take a look at Senator Larry Craig. Things did not go so well for him when he was arrested in a bizarre gay bathroom sting operation at the Minneapolis airport. As soon as his Republican colleagues learned of his illegal gay activity, they demanded he resign.

Craig has since claimed he is not gay and has filed papers to withdraw his guilty plea and fight the charges. He will most probably win the case because all he did was tap his foot near a cop’s foot. It will be a tough crime to prosecute. But his fellow Republicans don’t care whether or not he is going to withdraw his plea and fight the charges. They want the gay dude gone.

So, here’s the crime scorecard. Vitter admits to having sex with hookers and there is even evidence that he called for whores while he was voting on the House floor. Standing ovation. Larry Craig pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor because he was scared that the media would discover his arrest. He then said he would fight the charges. He is forced to resign. One man was having straight sex, while the other was looking for gay sex. Both are crimes, but one got lucky with the statute of limitations. Not hard to figure out what the problem was with Craig.

But the heat is about to be turned up on David Vitter. Another prostitute claimed she had a four-month “sexual relationship” with the Senator. Because her claims could not be verified, the charges went away. But now it looks like they are coming back.

Larry Flint paid for the hooker to take a lie detector test, which she passed. Today he will hold a news conference with the prostitute to reveal the results. They will then challenge Senator Vitter to take his own polygraph.


Ellis said Monday that she took the polygraph test because Vitter tried to impugn her credibility at a news conference in July, when he denied news reports about his involvement with prostitutes in New Orleans without being specific.


Please don’t impugn the credibility of the whore. That is not cool.

And it gets better. Flynt is paying Ellis to detail all her fuck sessions with Vitter. They will be published next spring in Hustler. The magazine made sure Ellis passed the lie detector test before they offered her the deal.


Ellis said she met regularly with Vitter in the French Quarter apartment and that he paid her through her pimp, Jonathan, whose last name she did not know. She said Vitter met her through the New Orleans Escort Service.


Sadly, Vitter was not a freak.


Ellis said she and Vitter had safe sex and that he did not have any unusual proclivities. She said he paid $300 an hour for her services.

"He was a very clean man," Ellis said. "He came in, took a shower, did his business and would leave."


Boo. Why couldn’t he just shit on her chest once? It would have made this a lot more fun. Either way, as much as the Republicans and Vitter want this to go away, it’s not. And the same can be said for Larry Craig, as he gears up to fight the charges. Keep it in the news as long as you can, boys. And don't forget, one is good and the other is bad.

 

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Comments
failure_face

failure_face

I'm lost
September 2007

SEP 11, 2007 09:10 AM

I've got nothing witty to say. I just hate Republicans.

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

USA
May 2006

SEP 11, 2007 09:19 AM

I could probably look it up, but what exactly was the crime that Craig did? Is gay sex a crime? Was it because it was in a public place? I just haven't figured that part out yet. I'm also curious as to why police officers were wasting their time with this sting when there are real crimes going on in the world. I could understand if the cop was posing as a 15 year old boy or something, but if two adult males want to bang anonymously in a bathroom stall, I don't see what the problem is.

Zarth

zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

SEP 11, 2007 09:23 AM

coyotemike said:
I could probably look it up, but what exactly was the crime that Craig did? Is gay sex a crime? Was it because it was in a public place? I just haven't figured that part out yet. I'm also curious as to why police officers were wasting their time with this sting when there are real crimes going on in the world. I could understand if the cop was posing as a 15 year old boy or something, but if two adult males want to bang anonymously in a bathroom stall, I don't see what the problem is.


"Lewd behavior" was the charge. It is a crime to engage in sex - gay or straight - in any public space.

What I'm stuck on about this asshole Vitter is not th whole hypocrisy about adultery with a female prostitute being somehow more tolerable than mansex - I expect that kind of idiocy - but this:

This was a very serious sin in my past for which I am, of course, completely responsible. Several years ago, I asked for and received forgiveness from God . . .


That's blasphemy to say that you "received forgiveness from God." According to the book, no-one knows who's saved and who's not. You'd think that self-declared "Christians" would fucking know that.

Chainlink

Chainlink

Key West, FL
August 2005

SEP 11, 2007 09:38 AM

Zarth said:

What I'm stuck on about this asshole Vitter is not th whole hypocrisy about adultery with a female prostitute being somehow more tolerable than mansex - I expect that kind of idiocy - but this:

This was a very serious sin in my past for which I am, of course, completely responsible. Several years ago, I asked for and received forgiveness from God . . .


That's blasphemy to say that you "received forgiveness from God." According to the book, no-one knows who's saved and who's not. You'd think that self-declared "Christians" would fucking know that.



Christ is MADE of forgiveness. Didn't you get the memo ?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Yes, I used caps for emphasis just to annoy you. HA HA HA !!

Zarth

zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

SEP 11, 2007 09:39 AM

chainlink said:

Zarth said:
What I'm stuck on about this asshole Vitter is not th whole hypocrisy about adultery with a female prostitute being somehow more tolerable than mansex - I expect that kind of idiocy - but this:

This was a very serious sin in my past for which I am, of course, completely responsible. Several years ago, I asked for and received forgiveness from God . . .


That's blasphemy to say that you "received forgiveness from God." According to the book, no-one knows who's saved and who's not. You'd think that self-declared "Christians" would fucking know that.


Christ is MADE of forgiveness. Didn't you get the memo ?


They didn't cc that memo to godless Reds like me.

Subrosa

Subrosa

San Francisco, CA
July 2004

SEP 11, 2007 09:58 AM

FearTheReaper said:
Craig has since claimed he is not gay and has filed papers to withdraw his guilty plea and fight the charges. He will most probably win the case because all he did was tap his foot near a cop's foot. .



Not so sure about that. It's my impression that it's very rare that a convict be allowed to withdraw his guilty plea and is reserved only for compelling circumstances. Not sure this will qualify.

Also, people are prosecuted for stuff like this all the time with just as much evidence and convicted. His case is going to be tough to make even if he was allowed to withdraw his guilty plea.

Drakyn

Drakyn

New Providence, NJ
September 2006

SEP 11, 2007 10:07 AM

Actually, if you look carefully at how many of the republicans are wording there denouncements of Sen. Craig, they seem more pissed that he admitted fault than that he was gay.

Republicans don't approve of people owning up to anything

FearTheReaper

FearTheReaper

NEWSWIRE

I'm lost

SEP 11, 2007 10:24 AM

Subrosa said:

FearTheReaper said:
Craig has since claimed he is not gay and has filed papers to withdraw his guilty plea and fight the charges. He will most probably win the case because all he did was tap his foot near a cop's foot. .



Not so sure about that. It's my impression that it's very rare that a convict be allowed to withdraw his guilty plea and is reserved only for compelling circumstances. Not sure this will qualify.

Also, people are prosecuted for stuff like this all the time with just as much evidence and convicted. His case is going to be tough to make even if he was allowed to withdraw his guilty plea.



Ah, I was under the impression it would be easier to withdraw his plea, based on a lawyer's blog. Upon further research, that appears to not be true.


ust days ago, the Minnesota Court of Appeals issued an opinion explaining the standard for a guilty plea to be valid, it must be accurate, voluntary, and intelligent (i.e., knowingly and understandingly made). Once a guilty plea has been entered, there is no absolute right to withdraw that plea. But Minn. R. Crim. P. 15.05, subd. 1, allows a defendant to withdraw a guilty plea upon a timely motion and showing of manifest injustice. The burden is on the defendant to demonstrate that the refusal to allow him to withdraw his plea is manifestly unjust. It is manifestly unjust to refuse to allow the defendant to withdraw a plea if that plea is not accurate, voluntary, or intelligent. (Munger v. State, A06-1563 (Minn. App. 8-28-2007))


Craig was mailed a three page letter detailing the crime and accepting his guilty plea. He signed it and sent it back. He's fucked. (and not in a gay way)

On Craig's side.


Blogger Beldar just got off the phone with the Hennepin, County Court Clerk. He was trying to find out if there was a Form 11 in the file showing Craig had been advised of and waived his right to counsel.

The Clerk said she didn't see one and told Beldar a hearing has been set for September 26th at 1:30 pm on Craig's motion to withdraw the plea.

FridgeMagnet

FridgeMagnet

Chicago, IL
November 2004

SEP 11, 2007 11:01 AM

failure_face said:
I've got nothing witty to say. I just hate Republicans.



Very thoughtful response. You're clearly better than anyone who is a Republican. Well done, sir.

Benzino

Benzino

Winnipeg, MB
November 2006

SEP 11, 2007 11:09 AM

You spelled Larry Flynt wrong. But to get past my picky response. This just shows that blatant hypocrisy of the Rebublican party. Paying a madam and calling her while in the proccess of casting votes should get you thrown out on your ass.

Squire

Squire

I'm lost
November 2003

SEP 11, 2007 11:28 AM

Subrosa said:

FearTheReaper said:
Craig has since claimed he is not gay and has filed papers to withdraw his guilty plea and fight the charges. He will most probably win the case because all he did was tap his foot near a cop's foot. .



Not so sure about that. It's my impression that it's very rare that a convict be allowed to withdraw his guilty plea and is reserved only for compelling circumstances. Not sure this will qualify.

Also, people are prosecuted for stuff like this all the time with just as much evidence and convicted. His case is going to be tough to make even if he was allowed to withdraw his guilty plea.



Yeah. I don't know squat re Minnesota criminal statutes, but disorderly conduct laws are often vague enough to encompass just about anything.

I think his attempt to withdraw his plea is just completely fuckin' stupid. I mean, the damage is done. If I was his counsel I'd actually advise against it. Not any realy tangible good it is going to do him. I'd assume it's a misdemeanor . . . .

zyryx

zyryx

Tyler, TX
April 2004

SEP 11, 2007 11:36 AM

shit on her chest? nah, his GOP buddies would have dug that. to bad he didn't request her to wear a huge strap on and fuck him in the ass while he dressed up like a catholic school girl, all the while calling him a little bitch

Gerry_D

Gerry_D

Los Angeles, CA
May 2003

SEP 11, 2007 11:44 AM

isn't a chest shit referred to as a "Cleveland Steamer"?

unfiltrator

unfiltrator

San Francisco, CA
April 2004

SEP 11, 2007 11:52 AM

As long as they said they were sorry.

Whoopie!

HorseheadFiddle

HorseheadFiddle

San Diego, CA
October 2004

SEP 11, 2007 12:15 PM

Gerry_D said:
isn't a chest shit referred to as a "Cleveland Steamer"?



Yes it is. That will cost you extra.
Except with the south Vietnamese ones.

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