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  • MONDAY AUGUST 13 2007 9:00 AM

The Republican Candidates Are Sad Little Turds

Submitted by FearTheReaper

Edited by erin_broadley

Tags: Republican Elections, Rudy Giuliani, Mitt Romney, John McCain, Fred Thompson



The big news from this weekend’s Iowa straw poll was how little the voting public thinks of the current crop of Republican candidates. Ten thousand fewer Republicans cast votes for this group of candidates than they did for the 2000 candidates. “None of the above” is consistently winning in Republican polls. The reason is simple: Every Republican candidate has some horrible quality that makes them unelectable to the base.

Rudy Giuliani won’t win the nomination because he is pro-abortion and has an ugly marital history. He is twice divorced, once marrying a cousin and another time living through a nasty public separation while Mayor of New York.


27% of Republican voters see Giuliani as politically conservative, while 68% say moderate or liberal.


There is no way Giuliani will win a Republican nomination with the current state of religious lunacy that has a hold over the party. Sorry, loser, you’re out.

Fred Thompson is the newest of the candidates who has absolutely no chance. Freddy also has a problem with his abortion loving past. He was a lobbyist for a pro-choice group, which may actually be worse than being ideologically against abortion.


22% have an unfavorable view of Thompson.


Watch that number shoot up when he actually joins the race and Republicans get a look at his abortion record. Sorry, actor boy, you’re gone.

Mitt Romney is such a poor candidate for the Republican ticket that it is astounding. He has spent loads of money and is only polling in third place.


31% of Republican Voters have an unfavorable opinion of him.


Why? He’s a Mormon. Game over.

John McCain is old and shockingly pathetic. He attached himself to Bush’s surge and took a walk through the streets of Iraq surrounded by helicopters and soldiers. That was the day his campaign ended.


Within his own party, McCain is viewed favorably 54% and unfavorably by 40%.


He is also considered to be a "moderate" turncoat by many Republicans. Good night, grandpa.

An August 5th Rasmussen poll has Giuliani on top. (None of the above was not given as an option)

Giuliani 25%
Thompson 24%
Romney 14%
McCain 11%
Mike Huckabee 3%
Sam Brownback 2%
Ron Paul, Duncan Hunter, Tom Tancredo are just tiny blips of nothingness.

Republicans need a viable candidate to step in and take over this mess or the masses are going to vote for No One to face the Democratic opponent.

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Comments
Zarth

zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

AUG 13, 2007 01:46 PM

FreakPirate said:

Zarth said:

Silence, you Canadian Rat-Dog Slave! You still worship your God-Queen, and obviously have no comprehension of what True American Freedom(tm) is about!


Thank goodness for that.
Now... if you'll excuse me I'm off to my province assisted hospital. I've just been stabbed by a gay.


Yes, suffer under your Socialized Medicine, why don't you!

FearTheReaper

FearTheReaper

NEWSWIRE

I'm lost

AUG 13, 2007 01:46 PM

eightyeighty said:
zarth, do you work? anyway it's how i feel about the articles i read here. which i try not to look at too much anymore, remembering that i joined the site for the girls.
now go ahead and bash me again, but hurry up before your parents come home.



SNAP! He asked you if you work because you are posting on an internet message board. He, however, is doing no such thing.

Zarth

zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

AUG 13, 2007 01:48 PM

FearTheReaper said:

eightyeighty said:
zarth, do you work? anyway it's how i feel about the articles i read here. which i try not to look at too much anymore, remembering that i joined the site for the girls.
now go ahead and bash me again, but hurry up before your parents come home.


SNAP! He asked you if you work because you are posting on an internet message board. He, however, is doing no such thing.


I especially love how well he addressed my points and didn't just insult me like a moron.

Nice to see someone elevating the discourse like that.

danarg

danarg

Salt Lake City, UT
September 2006

AUG 13, 2007 01:54 PM

I'm not gonna lie republicans are like little boys trying to convince everyone that eating your boogers is cool.
yeah liberal in utah
-dan smile

ChopperJones

ChopperJones

Deltona, FL
September 2005

AUG 13, 2007 01:55 PM

"Warning"
gratuitous worshiping

I think FTR's articles are great and I dont agree with 90% of them yet the first thing I do when I get home from work is log on and look to see his next article(and there is always a new one). I love everyone because they make me think past my own beliefs and they are usually funny as hell. Your wordsmithing makes my day. (Yes. I am easily amused and could never be friends with Kurt Cobain)
Please continue your colorful satire...err...commentary...ehh...rants...hmmm...mental vomiting. FTR you are a credit to your craft, this site, and the United Staes of America.

ChopperJones

ChopperJones

Deltona, FL
September 2005

AUG 13, 2007 01:59 PM

Uncognitive said:

Zarth said:
It's pretty exciting. I'm excited.



I am also quite thrilled at the concept of gangs of gay people roaming the streets, killing at will. It's like a bad 70's sci-fi movie, only fabulous.



Dude I hurt my self laughing at the fabulous remark.

Rafi

Rafi

Santa Monica, CA
January 2003

AUG 13, 2007 02:22 PM

Zarth said:

Uncognitive said:

Zarth said:
It's pretty exciting. I'm excited.


I am also quite thrilled at the concept of gangs of gay people roaming the streets, killing at will. It's like a bad 70's sci-fi movie, only fabulous.


Come to think of it, that would be kind of cool.



The O'Reilly prophecy has come to pass!

OhSoOrdinary

OhSoOrdinary

New York, NY
July 2006

AUG 13, 2007 03:30 PM

FearTheReaper said:

MessyJessy said:

graphicsman77 said:
how you can right an article



I have no idea...



You actually missed this:

graphicsman77 said:
Oh and by the way, Mitt Romney one the fucking straw poll....how you can right an article





You guys... we're aren't supposed to make fun of retards. It's not nice. They can't help their mental disability or their political party...

NickFaust

NickFaust

USA
April 2004

AUG 13, 2007 03:39 PM

graphicsman77 said:
This article shows just how little understanding you have of the Iowa Straw Poll, or the Republicans in general. I'm amazed at how a community that prides itself on tolerance and acceptance, can be so jaded and intolerant of others political views....quite to the point of ridicule. That is unacceptible, and I think you need to consider an apology to those of us who happen to be Republicans. Our money spends just as easily as anyone else's. I don't think that we paid our membership dues to come here and have our views disparaged daily by individuals who have the faintest notion of what they speak.

Frankly, I think you'd be better served monitoring your own side of the aisle, and covering the lightweights in the Democratic race. mad



Funny thing is, even the Repuglies know the field sucks. As FTR said there were 14,302 total ballots cast were down substantially from the 23,685 in 1999. linky

So, it seems to me that your problems are in your own party. Not with folks pointing out how fucked up your party is.

NickFaust

NickFaust

USA
April 2004

AUG 13, 2007 03:43 PM

Error

Zarth

zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

AUG 13, 2007 03:46 PM

oyaji said:

alpha22 said:

bean said:

alpha22 said:


Finally, we get to the root of what you're really trying to say.


Thats true, If you don't have anything nice to say, Don't say anything at all.


A better rule of thumb would be: "if you don't have anything intelligent or amusing to stay, don't compensate by being an inveterate troll."


But then who would we flame?

You haven't really thought this through, have you?

OhSoOrdinary

OhSoOrdinary

New York, NY
July 2006

AUG 13, 2007 03:50 PM

oyaji said:

alpha22 said:

bean said:

alpha22 said:


Finally, we get to the root of what you're really trying to say.



Thats true, If you don't have anything nice to say, Don't say anything at all.



A better rule of thumb would be: "if you don't have anything intelligent or amusing to stay, don't compensate by being an invetebrate troll."



High fucking five.

Zarth

zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

AUG 13, 2007 03:52 PM

oyaji said:

Zarth said:

oyaji said:

alpha22 said:

bean said:

alpha22 said:


Finally, we get to the root of what you're really trying to say.


Thats true, If you don't have anything nice to say, Don't say anything at all.


A better rule of thumb would be: "if you don't have anything intelligent or amusing to stay, don't compensate by being an inveterate troll."


But then who would we flame?

You haven't really thought this through, have you?


There is no way he's going to listen to me, yaar.


I'm sorry, what?

heartattack59

heartattack59

Cleveland, OH
July 2007

AUG 13, 2007 04:45 PM

There was a LOGO debate last week and can anybody tell me how many Republicans showed up?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

Big... Fat... Goose Egg.

Tiger_Fodder

Tiger_Fodder

Braintree, MA
June 2007

AUG 13, 2007 07:43 PM

oyaji said:

heartattack59 said:
There was a LOGO debate last week and can anybody tell me how many Republicans showed up?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

Big... Fat... Goose Egg.



That sucks and all, but how is that relevant to this particular thread?



Since when do posts need to be relevant to a thread? You must be thinking of the WSJ Blog.

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