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Music in Church is The Bomb?

THURSDAY FEBRUARY 22 2007 8:00 PM

Submitted by legionnaire. Edited By legionnaire.

TAGS: bomb squad, music, church

The past few weeks have seen one case of incredibly irrational police responses to something that only a completely delusional person would think represented any sort of a threat. Apparently that trend continued today, with police forces blowing up CD players hidden underneath church pews that were spewing "rock and roll" and "foul language" during a church service.

Three CD players hidden under a cathedral's pews blared sexually explicit language in the middle of an Ash Wednesday Mass, leading a bomb squad to detonate two of the devices.

Authorities determined the music players were not dangerous and kept the third one to check it for clues, said police Capt. Gary Johnson.

The CD players, duct-taped to the bottoms of the pews, were set to turn on in the middle of noon Mass on Wednesday at the Roman Catholic Cathedral Basilica of St. Francis of Assisi.

The recordings, made on store-bought blank discs, featured people using foul language and "pornographic messages," Johnson said. He would not elaborate because of the ongoing investigation.

Is the prank in poor taste? Yes. Is it offensive to a lot of people? Undoubtedly. (Hilarious to others? Probably.) Does it merit bringing in demolitions experts to rig explosives to completely annihilate the offending technology? I think most people would probably consider that just a tad excessive.

26 Comments

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HeyZeus

Oakland, CA

August 2006

FEB 22, 2007 08:11 PM

If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards it says "To my sweet Satan."

Subrosa

San Francisco, CA

July 2004

FEB 22, 2007 08:21 PM

Paul is Dead!

geo35

Minneapolis, MN

January 2003

FEB 22, 2007 08:48 PM

They kept the third device "to test it for fingerprints & DNA." Do they really believe that this was the work of hardened criminals whose fingerprints and DNA will already be on file? WTF?

Man, there's gotta' be a couple of 14-year-olds (and their girlfriends) laughin' it up in Santa Fe tonight.

ankiel66

Seattle, WA

June 2003

FEB 22, 2007 08:50 PM

At least they aren't blowing up new technology, like a zune.

SmellsLikeSciFi

Houston, TX

April 2004

FEB 22, 2007 08:56 PM

@ geo35:
Why do you think police departments have had such hard-ons for "child safety" registration?

First it started in the 80's with fingerprinting after John Walsh's kid got abducted and murdered. Now they're doing videos and blood tests. Where does all this information go? Into a database, that's where.

What I want to know is: what the fuck is a pornographic message? Is it something like: "Ooooooh, not really a virgin now, are we, Mary? I bet you like it like that don't you, you dirty little virgin?" Or maybe they were instructional, or commanding. I'll tell you what I would do if I were them...it would've been much funnier to see if they would've thought the voice of god was telling them to take off their underwear and do cartwheels.

As for the unnecessary demolitions, this is AMERICA! Where we've been brainwashed to be afraid of EVERYTHING

People in Boston freaked out and called the bomb squad over the moonenite lite brite's that were hung up as guerrilla marketing for the Aqua Teen movie.

PS-The offending lite brite's were swiftly sent to 80's fad toy heaven in a non-ceremonial fashion.

12AngryBadgers

Albany, NY

May 2004

FEB 22, 2007 09:03 PM

HeyZeus said:
If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards it says "To my sweet Satan."

"...if you've ever sat around playing your albums backwards, you are Satan." -- Bill Hicks

HeyZeus

Oakland, CA

August 2006

FEB 22, 2007 09:05 PM

12AngryBadgers said:

HeyZeus said:
If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards it says "To my sweet Satan."

"...if you've ever sat around playing your albums backwards, you are Satan." -- Bill Hicks

Uh, oh.

codyp

Camarillo, CA

January 2006

FEB 22, 2007 09:06 PM

umm i can't seem to grasp the reasoning of blowing them up.
I just don't understand how they come to the conclusion of them needing to explode.
Although if thats all it takes to get some explosions going on, im going to church this sunday.

goodpoltergeist

Auburn, AL

January 2007

FEB 22, 2007 09:22 PM

codyp said:
umm i can't seem to grasp the reasoning of blowing them up.
I just don't understand how they come to the conclusion of them needing to explode.
Although if thats all it takes to get some explosions going on, im going to church this sunday.

they had a rough day, they needed to unwind

catdad

Portland, OR

August 2002

FEB 22, 2007 09:30 PM

The terrorists have obviously already won against some people in this country.

And why aren't they calling them "hoax devices"?

goatboy23

Vatican City

November 2003

FEB 23, 2007 12:03 AM

Got their anti-terror training in Boston, eh?

Kudos to whomever pulled this prank. Way to go, kids! Nice work!

quagmirething

I'm lost

June 2005

FEB 23, 2007 02:02 AM

This really isn't much like the Boston thing. The problem with Boston was that they closed down a huge amount of stuff which couldn't possibly be affected, even had the signs been lined with top grade plastic explosive. When they came out looking exceptionally stupid the dick waving started.

No mess and no fuss, Santa Fe doing fine.

Cyric

I'm lost

October 2003

FEB 23, 2007 04:02 AM

what if the third one was really a bomb?

jason

USA

August 2002

FEB 23, 2007 05:28 AM

i am imagining a bunch of gung-ho guys who spend all day every day for years (since 9-11) training for shit that NEVER happens here. ever (i was downtown in manhattan on 9-11 so i guess im just not too worried about cd players in churches and lite-brites).

this reminds me of playing fetch with a dog that is trained to heel. you make a throwing gesture and the tension in the air hangs thick until you give it permission to run. although it would be nice to find a ball, the dog doesn't give a shit you actually threw anything or not.