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  • WEDNESDAY JANUARY 3 2007 8:00 PM

World's Greatest “Fuck You” Ever

Submitted by FearTheReaper

Edited by erin_broadley

Tags: Keith Ellison, Virgil Goode, Bible, Koran, Virginia

In November, Keith Ellison of Minnesota became the first Muslim elected to Congress. Ellison then told the press that he would swear his oath on a Koran and all hell broke loose.

Conservative commentators went ape shit because they incorrectly believe the oath should be taken on something called The Bible. The controversy swelled when a fellow Congressman, Virgil Goode, declared:


"When I raise my hand to take the oath on Swearing In Day, I will have the Bible in my other hand. I do not subscribe to using the Koran in any way. The Muslim Representative from Minnesota was elected by the voters of that district and if American citizens don't wake up and adopt the Virgil Goode position on immigration there will likely be many more Muslims elected to office and demanding the use of the Koran."


Ellison was born in the United States and his family roots in this country can be traced back to 1742. None of that mattered to Goode, who became a hero on Fox News where he claimed that he stands for the principles upon which this country was founded. Goode represents the same Virginia county where Thomas Jefferson was born in 1743.

Which is probably why Ellison decided to shove Goode’s morals down his ignorant throat throat with a little American history. Today Keith Ellison announced he would take his oath of office on a Koran that was owned by Thomas Jefferson.


Jefferson's copy is an English translation by George Sale published in the 1750s; it survived the 1851 fire that destroyed most of Jefferson's collection and has his customary initialing on the pages.


It survived the fire because God wanted it to be used in a future “go fuck yourself” moment. Goode has no comment.

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Comments
Chainlink

Chainlink

Key West, FL
August 2005

JAN 07, 2007 07:40 AM

kaosmaker666 said:
Freedom of religion is a right.......be it the Koran, the Bible, the Book of Mormon, whatever........Teddy Roosevelt took his oath on a law book!!!
I don't see it as a "fuck you", I see it as a right!!!

Ellison can trace his roots to 1742??? I find that had to believe......unless he is related to Alex Haley.



Tracing your roots to the mid 1700's is not that big a deal. I hung out with my great grandfather. He was born in 1882. Finding out about who was who a few more generations back is not too hard.
Just because YOU don't even know who your father was don't presume it's something incredible.

skeptik

skeptik

New Orleans, LA
February 2004

JAN 07, 2007 09:59 AM

chainlink said:

kaosmaker666 said:
Freedom of religion is a right.......be it the Koran, the Bible, the Book of Mormon, whatever........Teddy Roosevelt took his oath on a law book!!!
I don't see it as a "fuck you", I see it as a right!!!

Ellison can trace his roots to 1742??? I find that had to believe......unless he is related to Alex Haley.



Tracing your roots to the mid 1700's is not that big a deal. I hung out with my great grandfather. He was born in 1882. Finding out about who was who a few more generations back is not too hard.
Just because YOU don't even know who your father was don't presume it's something incredible.



Yeah, but Ellison's black!

That must mean that he couldn't have known anything about his personal history - except possibly that his ancestors were slaves. Right? And they were all entirely anonymous and irrelevant to history, y'know ...

I mean, I've never even heard of people like Crispus Attucks, Phillis Wheatley, Benjamin Banneker, Prince Hall, or Frederick Douglass - they just couldn't have known anything about themselves except whether or not they were slaves!

Sheesh!

OctoberSeven

OctoberSeven

Downers Grove, IL
December 2002

JAN 07, 2007 07:47 PM

Clearly Thomas Jefferson was a goddamn dirt terrorist.



In all seriousness I believe that our presidents, lawmakers, and judges should be sworn into office by taking an oath with hands on a copy of the constitution.

Gringo

Gringo

Spokane, WA
May 2006

JAN 07, 2007 07:57 PM

Penfold said:
In all seriousness I believe that our presidents, lawmakers, and judges should be sworn into office by taking an oath with hands on a copy of the constitution.


Or whilst hooked up to a polygraph machine......while monitoring the results during said oath.

malkav11

malkav11

Saint Paul, MN
July 2003

JAN 07, 2007 08:59 PM

Polygraph machines aren't especially reliable.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

I vote we suck out their brains with tubes and place them into a powerful computational device for thorough and comprehensive analysis. Plus, someday we might figure out how to put their brains back in! Win-win for everyone. smile

Zarth

zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

JAN 07, 2007 09:40 PM

chainlink said:

kaosmaker666 said:
Freedom of religion is a right.......be it the Koran, the Bible, the Book of Mormon, whatever........Teddy Roosevelt took his oath on a law book!!!
I don't see it as a "fuck you", I see it as a right!!!

Ellison can trace his roots to 1742??? I find that had to believe......unless he is related to Alex Haley.



Tracing your roots to the mid 1700's is not that big a deal. I hung out with my great grandfather. He was born in 1882. Finding out about who was who a few more generations back is not too hard.
Just because YOU don't even know who your father was don't presume it's something incredible.



That was absolutely fucking flawless, chain. Well done.

SoEffinHappy

SoEffinHappy

Philadelphia, PA
April 2003

JAN 10, 2007 05:47 PM

Guys this is absolutely insane. Why is there a burden of proof at all? Trying to prove religious beliefs to someone else is not only futile but a little insulting. They're called beliefs because they can't be proven. How on earth would I possibly prove to someone like Zarth or NickFaust that God exists? The religious man looks at the world and sees miracles in everything, the atheist looks around him and sees only the world. All this talk of delusion and stupid and bigoted and proof and every other damned thing is ridiculous. Religion is (or should be) a personal decision, based on your own personal evidence. It certainly isn't something to be proven.

NickFaust

NickFaust

USA
April 2004

JAN 10, 2007 06:17 PM

SoEffinHappy said:
Guys this is absolutely insane. Why is there a burden of proof at all? Trying to prove religious beliefs to someone else is not only futile but a little insulting. They're called beliefs because they can't be proven. How on earth would I possibly prove to someone like Zarth or NickFaust that God exists?



Well, gee that's easy. Provide some empirical eveidence of the existance of a (any) god.

The religious man looks at the world and sees miracles in everything, the atheist looks around him and sees only the world. All this talk of delusion and stupid and bigoted and proof and every other damned thing is ridiculous. Religion is (or should be) a personal decision, based on your own personal evidence. It certainly isn't something to be proven.



Agreed. So why then are so many people seeking to claim that the bible describes the scientific realty of our universe. Why are they trying to force their "personal decison" on others.

Druggist

Druggist

Gainesville, FL
November 2006

JAN 12, 2007 03:48 PM

buahaha

MrCrisp

MrCrisp

I'm lost
August 2004

JAN 12, 2007 04:06 PM

Zarth said:

wildswan said:
I think what's being asked for is apodictic proof.



Well, the fact is that I'm right and my opponents are wrong, and if they can't see that, they're somehow defective. God as I have defined him cannot exist because it is impossible for God as I have defined him to exist by the terms of existence as I have defined them. Frankly, I don't even know what's to be argued about.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
It's been a pretty typical religious discussion, I guess.


SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Made you look.



head asplode

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