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  • TUESDAY NOVEMBER 14 2006 7:00 PM

Feds: No Fucking on Planes

Submitted by legionnaire

Edited by legionnaire

Tags: planes, sex

Becoming a member of the mile high club is a staple fantasy of virtually every frat boy in the nation. While the prospect of getting it on in a cramped, smelly airplane bathroom or underneath a dingy blanket on uncomfortable seats with an armrest up one's butt is hardly appealing for most air travelers, it has nevertheless not deterred many intrepid explorers from attaining this avionic sexual merit badge. But it seems that era may be coming to a close, with the federal government apparently cracking down on the more egregious attempts of people to enter into this exclusive organization.

California couple are facing federal charges after allegedly refusing to stop "overt sexual activity" on a flight to Raleigh, North Carolina.

Carl Warren Persing, of Lakewood, California, and Dawn Elizabeth Sewell, of Huntington Beach, California, were indicted on charges of interfering with flight crew members during their September 15 Southwest Airlines flight from Los Angeles.

According to court documents, flight attendants saw Persing and Sewell kissing, embracing and "acting in a manner that made other passengers uncomfortable" while the plane was stopped in Phoenix.

A flight attendant asked them to stop. They obeyed initially but resumed the behavior during the flight from Phoenix to Raleigh, authorities said.

When the flight attendant again requested them to stop, Persing allegedly told the flight attendant: "I'm going to give you one warning to get out of my face."


This would seem to fall into the "don't they have anything better to do with their time?" category. Certainly even a ham sandwich can be indicted (which is where the case, U.S. v. Carl Warren Persing and Dawn Elizabeth Sewell, currently stands) but directing a US attorney to prosecute individuals who wouldn't stop making out when a flight attendant asked them and then tells the attendant to go away seems like a somewhat ridiculous usage of a law passed to ensure airline security.

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Comments
Dejoured

Dejoured

Sainte-anne-de-bellevue, QC
October 2006

NOV 15, 2006 09:57 AM

damn, ive always wanted sex on a plane....

dan_e_boy

dan_e_boy

USA
April 2003

NOV 15, 2006 10:01 AM

...uh, anyone else thinking of the bus scene in Dogma?

SGrizzy

SGrizzy

Tampa, FL
January 2004

NOV 15, 2006 10:04 AM

Is doing the deed in a rented Cessna good enough to join the mile high club?

I suppose it's hard to fly while getting your wig-wang squezed and not spill your drink.

NickFaust

NickFaust

USA
April 2004

NOV 15, 2006 10:34 AM

mrpenbrook said:

NickFaust said:
I agree with the both of you in principle, however, giving wait staff the power of Federal law and 20 year prison sentences seems a bit much, eh?



The problem is, you can't call the cops on a plane. Maybe there's a marshall on board and maybe not. It's not a perfect system but it seems that giving the "wait staff" some kind of lawful authority is the best compromise. The couple certainly would have gotten in trouble for disobeying a lawful order from a police officer and issuing a similar threat. I hope these people do get fined at the least.

I mean, come on. "Stop groping each other in public" is a pretty reasonable request.



Didn't say it wasn't. It's just not a crime - nor should it be. This law essentially makes the wait staff on the plane law officers. If they are going to be law officers then train them and pay them to be law officers and stop calling them "attendents."

I have seen these people almost accuse a man of "non-compliance" because they were talking so fast he couldn't understand them.

No, sorry - disobeying the wait staff should not be a crime. This law was meant to address reall threats to safety and security. Not doing what the stew says does not automoatically become a threat to safety and security.

lilcupcake

lilcupcake

Kitchener, ON
June 2006

NOV 15, 2006 10:34 AM


TheGringo said:
MUCH further. According to the flight attendant's afidavit, the guy, "had his face pressed against her vaginal area."

I mean...I'm down for PDA but there IS a limit with what's cool...especially in an airplane. Besides, the same principals apply to this situation as they did back in grade school: You have to bring enough to share for everyone.




Yeah cause this is so what I want my kids to see on a flight to visit Grandma, I am no prude but they should have showed some respect for other people on the plane, they sound like a bunch of morons.

Morgan

Morgan

SUICIDEGIRL

Illinois, USA

NOV 15, 2006 10:44 AM

As much as I know the more extreme charges won't stick, I'm still happen to see that some entitlement bitch airline customers acting like asshats got called out. Seriously, customers who are rude to people who are paid to be nice to them are just...stupid.

StarBelliedBoy

StarBelliedBoy

Philadelphia, PA
December 2003

NOV 15, 2006 10:53 AM

NickFaust said:
agree with the both of you in principle, however, giving wait staff the power of Federal law and 20 year prison sentences seems a bit much, eh?



That's 20 years MAX or a fine. You know all they'll have to do is pay a fine.


camalot said:
Fucking prudes. Get over yourselves.



What are you so pissed off about? Were you the guy? whatever

bean

bean

STAFF

Los Angeles, CA

NOV 15, 2006 12:14 PM

Sean said:
best headline in forever, reaper better watch out



I dunno, I might be biased, but I think Shalome has always been the master of totally awesome headlines...

Some Shit Blew Up in Outer Space
Space Station Astronauts Totally Fucked
Update: Astronauts Not Totally Fucked After All
Solar Flare Fucking Shit Up
Terrorism Paranoia Claims Life of Innocent Bicycle
The Senate is Full of Pussies
EU to Stick it in Microsoft's Dirty Ass
Mom! Venezuela and Mexico are Fighting!
Gay Penguin Pulls an Anne Heche
Don't Fuck With the Scots

etc....

smile

zyryx

zyryx

Tyler, TX
April 2004

NOV 15, 2006 05:05 PM

NickFaust said:

mrpenbrook said:

NickFaust said:
I agree with the both of you in principle, however, giving wait staff the power of Federal law and 20 year prison sentences seems a bit much, eh?



The problem is, you can't call the cops on a plane. Maybe there's a marshall on board and maybe not. It's not a perfect system but it seems that giving the "wait staff" some kind of lawful authority is the best compromise. The couple certainly would have gotten in trouble for disobeying a lawful order from a police officer and issuing a similar threat. I hope these people do get fined at the least.

I mean, come on. "Stop groping each other in public" is a pretty reasonable request.



Didn't say it wasn't. It's just not a crime - nor should it be. This law essentially makes the wait staff on the plane law officers. If they are going to be law officers then train them and pay them to be law officers and stop calling them "attendents."

I have seen these people almost accuse a man of "non-compliance" because they were talking so fast he couldn't understand them.

No, sorry - disobeying the wait staff should not be a crime. This law was meant to address reall threats to safety and security. Not doing what the stew says does not automoatically become a threat to safety and security.



they are not wait staff, they are the representatives of the captain/pilot and co-pilot. who ARE the law when the plane is sealed. this situation was handled exactly as it should have been. they were told to stop, they decided to harass and threaten the attendant. what should she have done? gone and brought the co-pilot back to attempt to put this asshat in place? no, she defused the situation by ignoring it and letting the police handle it when the plane landed.

jag58nm

jag58nm

Albuquerque, NM
November 2006

NOV 15, 2006 05:25 PM

Most of the comments on this topic seem to miss the real point. Sure they were assholes and deserve to be in some kind of trouble.

However, the use of anti-terrorism legislation to prosecute them is an ABUSE by the Dept of Homeland Security-- one of many abuses of the American people they are conducting in the name of their so-called war on terror. We need to wake up to this quick because pretty soon they will be executing people for jaywalking.

be_elzebe

be_elzebe

China
May 2006

NOV 15, 2006 05:44 PM

Hasn't it been illegal to fuck with/threaten/indimidate flight crew for a while???

be_elzebe

be_elzebe

China
May 2006

NOV 15, 2006 06:06 PM

This US Code was first codified on July 5th, 1994 but was amended in Oct., 2001 where they inserted the phrase attempts or conspires to do such an act


An individual on an aircraft in the special aircraft jurisdiction of the United States who, by assaulting or intimidating a flight crew member or flight attendant of the aircraft, interferes with the performance of the duties of the member or attendant or lessens the ability of the member or attendant to perform those duties, or attempts or conspires to do such an act, shall be fined under title 18, imprisoned for not more than 20 years, or both. However, if a dangerous weapon is used in assaulting or intimidating the member or attendant, the individual shall be imprisoned for any term of years or for life.



So if whatever homeboy-with-his-face-in-the-pie said to the flight crew counts as "intimidation," then I really don't think there's an argument for caps-locked ABUSE by the DHS, sorry. I don't feel badly at all for those inconsiderate horndogs.

NickFaust

NickFaust

USA
April 2004

NOV 15, 2006 08:29 PM

sportbikepilot said:
they are not wait staff, they are the representatives of the captain/pilot and co-pilot. who ARE the law when the plane is sealed. this situation was handled exactly as it should have been. they were told to stop, they decided to harass and threaten the attendant. what should she have done? gone and brought the co-pilot back to attempt to put this asshat in place? no, she defused the situation by ignoring it and letting the police handle it when the plane landed.



They are wait staff - and since they are now handing out credit card applications in flight, I would say they are far more representative of the company than the pilot.

However, do not blame them, per se - though many have copped a major attitide since this law was passed - the law itself and the atmosphere of overreaction is to blame. There are lots of ways to deal with this shit - tying up a federal prosecutor and the court system is pretty ridiculous.

Princelogos

Princelogos

USA
November 2005

NOV 15, 2006 09:59 PM

" Fuck Flying." ( yes it is a pun). biggrin

Gringo

Gringo

Spokane, WA
May 2006

NOV 15, 2006 10:49 PM

I think things can get a lot more volatile in a confined space such as an airplane than they can on say a bus where you can get off (no pun intended) or anywhere else where you aren't essentially stuck there.

The flight attendants have probably seen a lot more customers freak out or do things they wouldn't normally do or freak out over things they wouldn't normally freak out over if they weren't flying. You'd have to be an idiot to assume that passengers aren't more likely to get riled over something small when flying.

I guess in a way, the attendants act as "hall monitors" and do what they feel is necessary to keep the peace while forcing a plastic smile so you can't tell how disgusted with you they truly are. It's a shitty job and I sure as hell wouldn't want it. If/when there's a disaster...it's their jobs to save the same assholes on the plane who just caused unnecessary disturbances. They have a lot more duties assigned to them other than fetching you peanuts and refilling your drink.

If you feel you need total freedom while traveling - drive.

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