News > Politics > How To Piss Off and Insult an Asian Dude

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FRIDAY APRIL 21 2006 1:00 PM

How To Piss Off and Insult an Asian Dude

Submitted by FearTheReaper

Edited by Rahodeb

Really, really good day for the White House yesterday. The Chinese President, Hu Jintao, stopped by for a visit. It was considered a very important trip as the US and China are having some serious trade disagreements.

And this is how the White House handled it.

China wanted a formal state visit such as Mr Jiang got, but the Administration refused, calling it an "official" visit instead. Mr Bush acquiesced to the 21-gun salute but insisted on a luncheon instead of a formal dinner, in the East Room instead of the State Dining Room. Even the visiting country's flags were missing from the lampposts near the White House.

When Bush visited China recently he received a state visit and dinner. But this is a one way street.

No can do the formal state thing, sorry Honcho. Slap in the face number one. How about we do lunch stead o dinner? Huh? Slap in the face number two. Couldnt find yer flag, its red or somethin, right? Slap in the face number three.

Those were the decisions made BEFORE he arrived. Now for the exciting, Day of Face Slaps. Let us start with the press conference, where our Vice President took a little nappy.

Slap in the face number four. And it goes on and on...

The visit began with a slight when the official announcer said the band would play the "national anthem of the Republic of China" - the official name of Taiwan. It continued when the Vice-President, Dick Cheney, donned sunglasses for the ceremony, and again when Mr Hu, trying to leave the stage via the wrong staircase, was yanked back by his jacket. Mr Hu looked down at his sleeve to see the President of the United States tugging at it as if redirecting an errant child.

Oh, shit, that was your enemies name, not yours, right? Slap in the face number five. Sorry about Dick and the glasses, hes beat. Slap in the face number six. Hey, hey, dont go that way, stupid! Slap in the face number seven.

We need a BIG FINISH, come on, what can top that...

The White House had given press credentials to a Falun Gong activist who five years ago heckled Mr Hu's predecessor, Jiang Zemin, in Malta. Sure enough, 90 seconds into Mr Hu's speech on the South Lawn, the woman started shrieking "President Hu, your days are numbered!" and "President Bush, stop him from killing!"

Mr Bush and Mr Hu looked up, stunned. It took so long to silence her - a full three minutes - that Bush aides began to wonder if the Secret Service's strategy was to let her scream herself hoarse.

Then, why not get all pissy...

The meeting in the Oval Office brought more of the same. In front of the cameras, Bush thanked Hu for his "frankness" -- diplomatic code for disagreement -- and Hu stood expressionless. The two unexpectedly agreed to take questions from reporters, but Bush grew impatient as Hu gave a long answer about trade, made all the longer by the translation. Bush at one point tapped his foot on the ground. "It was a very comprehensive answer," he observed when Hu finished.

Its just one day but it really sums up this Presidency.

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Comments

FreakPirate

Canada

November 2002

APR 22, 2006 05:36 PM

UpTight said:

I wasn't

Oh. Cool.

Thanks.

elysianfielder

Los Angeles, CA

March 2003

APR 22, 2006 05:37 PM

smithers_jones said:
I think the brain trust at the Bush Administration stumbled onto something here: substitute empty symbolic gestures of disrespect that appeal the president's domestic base in lieu of a coherent policy on China. It serves no rational policy objective, but hey, it will play well on Fox News and Rush will love it.

You hit the nail on the head. Does anyone really believe these gestures of disrespect came out of the Administration's concern for human rights in China? After six years of happily letting all our manufacturing jobs flee there? (And yes, I know, Clinton did the same thing).

These periodic expressions of xenophobia/homophobia/religious fundamentalism, etc are in fact meant as winks to the morons who still might be willling to support Bush... even if that support is totally contrary to their economic interests.

fiendish

USA

December 2002

APR 22, 2006 07:42 PM

Goth said:

zoton said:
The worst part was the fact that the chinese president got better treatment from microsoft than from the white house.... classic url

That may help explain the poor treatment from the administration. Didn't the Chinese President visit Bill Gates before the White House?

wouldn't you?

ASSH0LE

Las Vegas, NV

June 2003

APR 22, 2006 09:45 PM

FreakPirate said:

Aya said:

I actually think that FearTheReaper has pissed off an asian dude with his apathy, for what its worth.

I'm full of rage. RAGE!!

Hmmmm... if I were the one trying to piss you off, I'd have posted that movie of you wrestling with the stuffed animal in your underwear.

Andvari

Calgary, AB

April 2005

APR 22, 2006 09:48 PM

FreakPirate said:

Aya said:

I actually think that FearTheReaper has pissed off an asian dude with his apathy, for what its worth.

I'm full of rage. RAGE!!

So much burning rage that his shirts just burn right off.

ASSH0LE

Las Vegas, NV

June 2003

APR 22, 2006 09:57 PM

elysianfielder said:

I'm leaning more towards general cluelessness, and perhaps a bit of arrogance in the impatience during the press conference. Bush isn't one for unscripted press conferences, unless that male prostitute "journalist" is lobbing him underhand softballs.

I see our continued trade (and even the job migration there) as a good thing. There's always a hope that as their financial situation improves, the Chinese people may move on to having other wants. And to some degree, it's been happening there for some time. People are tending to speak out about local politicians. Not to say that they hate the party, but to gripe about this or that thing that's happened locally.

And so long as we have common economic interests, chances of war are greatly diminished.

With regards to the people pushing for recognition of the PRC, that's something with did for about thirty years, then Nixon gave it up as useless symbolism. The PRC is largely irrelevant. We can do much better for them, and their eventual peaceful reintegration with the rest of China through quiet diplomacy. Making grandstanding statements isn't the best way to get things you want from the Chinese.

The only reason we have diplomatic relations at all with Vietnam is because they are now a valued trade partner. We had a war there that didn't go so well for us. A very touchy issue. Were it not for them having tons of great low-wage workers there, we probably never would have risked reopening that wound by talking to them.