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  • THURSDAY MARCH 4 2010 9:31 PM

Are You a Net Neanderthal?

Submitted by nixiepixel

Edited by nixiepixel

Tags: chat, internet politics, chatting, e-penis

With the dawning of the Internet, it has never been easier to get in touch and establish relationships with those you otherwise would have never met. Yet, what about the ignorant strangers lurking about the inner sanctums of the Web? Such people inspire me and make me want to poison the water supply at the same time. So how would I hook up with these elusive Net Neanderthals? Omegle, a new program and iPhone application which does just that. Fun!



Okay, I'm embellishing a bit; I did have a blast with this. However, it is not for the weak of humour. The concept of Omegle is randomly connecting one thinking, feeling individual with another by a simple click of a button, and it has glorious potential. When you enter the website or hop on from your approved Apple device, you are quickly prompted by a cheery online atmosphere and an easy-to-find "Start Chat!" button.

Now watch in awe as the hilarity grows like a virus and instantly instills in you that good ol' love/hate feeling. Kind of like how you feel about mullets and pro wrestling.



Four hours later you'll start doubting this whole "blind date on the net" thing. Not that this will stop you. Numerous "strangers" will ask you if they can 'oh please have sex with you' and you may just chime in: (completely outside your character, of course) "Sure thing, duder! Throw in your bloated, sore-laden, puss-ridden mother and you have yourself a deal!" HEY MAW!



The fantasy of carrying on intellectual conversation when spontaneously connecting two people that initially know nothing about each other is not unique to Omegle. For example, see the AIM Fishbot Phenomenon. We're sure the project developers have the best of intentions. However, Uncle Ben got it right; "With great power, comes great responsibility."


When given the choice of hiding behind the veil of anonymity and unleashing your inner creep, or showing your true intellectual self, which would you choose? Which do you choose?





Keyboard photo courtesy of Christopher Saccaro

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Comments
Bellica

Bellica

Mexico
February 2007

MAR 04, 2010 11:03 PM

Enjoyed the read biggrin

Accuser

Accuser

Dana Point, CA
October 2006

MAR 04, 2010 11:10 PM

I can never intentionally be a creep. It always happens by accident. frown

No, seriously, I always try to be nice. I have a ridiculously overdeveloped sense of empathy. I feel bad being mean to NPCs in RPGs. I can never play evil characters.

sick

sick

Minneapolis, MN
June 2003

MAR 05, 2010 05:07 AM

Another reason to add to my list of why the Internet will destroy the human race.

hor

hor

I'm lost
June 2005

MAR 05, 2010 06:25 AM


Well that was completely unexpected. I clicked the link fully expecting a barrage of instant disconnects and cock queries.

Instead, I ended up having a 60 minute conversation with my first click - a Norwegian high school kid named Lars. We talked about college, vikings and of course, metal! Though he admitted preferring hip-hop. I learned when Norway's Constitution Day is (May 17th), and we even conversed in Spanish for a while. Crazy.

Mr_Matt_

Mr_Matt_

Pompano Beach, FL
July 2005

MAR 05, 2010 07:14 AM

Some stranger said hi to me. I ran away. whatever

mydogfarted

mydogfarted

Oakland, NJ
June 2003

MAR 05, 2010 07:33 AM

So, this is the iPhone version of Chat Roulette?

Otoki

Otoki

SUICIDEGIRL

Minnesota, USA

MAR 05, 2010 07:41 AM

mydogfarted said:
So, this is the iPhone version of Chat Roulette?



Totally what I was thinking. Especially after last night's Daily Show.

brazenfait

brazenfait

I'm lost
June 2009

MAR 05, 2010 09:55 AM

also got a norwegian kid, wonder if its the same one?
turns out all connections are to a college campus in norway. the newest way to go a viking.

FitzSimmons

FitzSimmons

Saint Paul, MN
January 2008

MAR 05, 2010 01:53 PM

This was the extent of my 3 attempts at a conversation:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi smile
You: hi
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hello
Stranger: from?
You: St. Paul Minnesota
You: you?
Stranger: belgium
Stranger: m or f?
You: m
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: Where are you from?
Stranger: indonesia
Stranger: u?
You: USA
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Awesome. whatever

Shal

Shal

Los Angeles, CA
October 2002

MAR 05, 2010 03:34 PM

Wow. Just like online chat rooms, circa 1994.

surreal

NathanialBlood

NathanialBlood

United Kingdom
August 2006

MAR 05, 2010 03:40 PM

awwwwwww talks me back to searching by intrest on Yahoo messenger biggrin

ReAct

ReAct

Boston, MA
October 2009

MAR 05, 2010 04:41 PM

I wonder if the results would be any different if I just started randomly trying this in real life...? How many people would just open up to a "Howdy! So where are you from?"

-ReAct
"How to make friends and alienate people."

sick

sick

Minneapolis, MN
June 2003

MAR 05, 2010 04:49 PM

Shal said:
Wow. Just like online chat rooms, circa 1994.

surreal



Alas! How I long for the days when I could pretend to be a thirteen year old girl.

AlienHeep

AlienHeep

I'm lost
August 2008

MAR 05, 2010 05:18 PM

These are the types of sites and apps that the "internet is making people stupider" people love to use in their experiments.

motorfirebox

motorfirebox

Pittsburgh, PA
March 2004

MAR 05, 2010 05:25 PM

AlienSheep said:
These are the types of sites and apps that the "internet is making people stupider" people love to use in their experiments.


Yeah.

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