Those Are Some Bad-Ass Dolphins

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What should you do if you're surfing and a great white shark appears out of nowhere and starts chomping on your leg? You should summon your roving pack of bottlenose dolphin pals to form a protective ring around you, ensuring your safe return to shore with whatever is left of your leg.

This actually happened to a surfer by the name of Todd Endris in Marina State Park just off the coast of Monterey, California. In addition to successfully eating the flesh off of Todd's leg, the great white shark peeled the skin off of his back.

The shark, estimated at 12 to 15 feet long, hit him first as Endris was sitting on his surfboard, but couldn’t get its monster jaws around both surfer and surfboard. “The second time, he came down and clamped on my torso — sandwiched my board and my torso in his mouth,” Endris said.

The third time, the shark tried to swallow Endris’ right leg, and he said that was actually a good thing, because the shark’s grip anchored him while he kicked the beast in the head and snout with his left leg until it let go.

Back on shore some lifeguards stood around utterly helpless.

… including some lifeguards who told his friend, Brian Simpson, that Endris wasn’t going to make it.

Cut to: the dolphins! I picture that the dolphins were huddled up trying to figure out what to do. The head dolphin leads the charge just like Samuel L. Jackson in Snakes on a Plane. "I'm tired of these mother-fucking sharks eating these mother-fucking people!"

The dolphins, which had been cavorting in the surf all along, showed up then. They circled him, keeping the shark at bay, and enabled Endris to get back on his board and catch a wave to the shore.

The Whale and Dolphin Conservation Society has a few stories about dolphins helping humans. The first story dates back to the musician Arion in ancient Greece nearly over two-thousand years ago. The most recent story involves a group of fisherman in South Carolina and their sunken boat. They were surrounded by sharks and a group of dolphins told the sharks to scram and babysat the fishermen all night.

There is no conclusive evidence as to why dolphins are such sweeties. It could be that they think we're just another sea creature like them or they are some miraculous, other-worldly creatures with amazing consciences. You decide!

I love the unpredictability of sharks. They are totally ruthless predators in some situations. If you're Sharkman, you can seduce them into tonic immobility and have them eating out of the palm of your hand, rather than eating your hand.

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