This is one of those developments that reaffirms my belief in the impossible.

Holy shit. How do you even react to news that incredible? "Oh really, you invented an invisible tank, huh? Cool, so, uh, should I just give you all my money and belongings or...?"

I pity the guy standing across from him at the next cocktail party. "What have I been up to? Oh... this and that... not too much, really... Annnd, I built an invisible tank. A tank, remember how kick-ass they are? Giant gun, armor, etc... Sure you do, well, I said, why not mix that with, 'invisible'? Ahem, how about you? How's that whole "not building an invisible tank" thing working out for you? Oh, that's too bad."

There are just certain things that, despite my wishes to the contrary, I absolutely do not believe are possible. World-conquering robots, spider-strength, zombies, a funny Dane Cook bit... And then along comes something that throws it all into turmoil. Yes, prior to today, 17 minutes ago, to be precise, the idea of "invisible tanks," sounded fairly fucking preposterous to me... and yet, now we got 'em.

2012 ... I can totally make it 'til then.

This sounds like the explanation I'd have heard at the age of 11 from that one kid whose Halloween costume was "army man" every single year. I'd have thought it sounded good but figured it was bullshit.

Even now, two paragraphs back, if you'd asked me to explain how I thought we got invisible tanks I'd have said,"Well, it's simple, someone in the British government has befriended a sorcerer. A 'good-guy one', if he's offering to help us." My second guess would've been, "Hmmm, as far as I know, invisibility is often delivered via a serum... I'm gonna say, someone spilled the serum on a tank and voila! Invisible tank. No? Oh, I'm an idiot? Cool, I'll sit down now...

Excuse me, I'm going take a quick break to pen an open letter.

Dear This Article - Please stop blowing my fucking mind. If you keep being so awesome, the rest of my world will begin to fade in comparison. Thank you for understanding.

Okay, I'm back... To sum up, in a few years we'll have invisible tanks running around our planet. What this means is, for the rest of my life, I can no longer scoff at ridiculous theories and ideas... A friend could tell me he built a time machine out of a can-opener and when I laughed he'd hit me with, "Okay, laugh it up, 'guy who didn't believe we could make invisible tanks. Hah, shows what you know... Now I'm off to ancient Atlantis to bet on crab races and I'm not even taking you!" What a rip-off.

Happy Halloween, Jerks!!!


TheCoolerKing asks that if you love comics like Sarah Silverman, Bob Odenkirk and Dana Gould, and feel like helping out a friend of his in need, you should check out the upcoming benefit here: Tom Sharpe Benefit Info. Many thanks.