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Wil Wheaton's Geek in Review: Pac-Man Fever

WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 7 2007 12:00 PM

Submitted by WilWheaton. Edited By erin_broadley.

TAGS: classic games, arcades, 1980s

I was born in 1972, and came of age in the 1980s, which means that I am of the video game generation. Though my family started with the Odyssey2 before moving to the Atari 2600 and Atari 400 (membrane keyboards FTW!) much of my gaming took place in various arcades, or local businesses — pizza parlors, drug stores, bowling alleys, liquor stores and even a head shop — and they played such an important role in my life, I still have all kinds of very clear and powerful memories associated with certain games and the places I played them. It's good that I do, because arcades in America are vanishing like rainforests.

Come with me, for a moment, back to the days when a quarter really meant something, and take a look at some of those games and places . . .

Donkey Kong will forever be associated with Verdugo Bowling Alley in La Crescenta, because that's where I first saw it. In fact, I thought it was some weird bowling game because the barrells on level one look like bowling balls, if you're nine years old and in a bowling alley. Donkey Kong Junior, on the other hand, will always remind me of my Aunt Val's house, where my cousin Jack's outrageously rich absentee father had actually bought him a stand up Nintendo cabinet of his own.

Another Nintendo staple, Punch Out!!, takes me back to Malibu Grand Prix, a Southern California staple in the pre-lawsuit-as-lottery '80s where adults could race cars around a twisty track while their kids played mini golf outside or tons of video games inside. I was never any good at Punch Out!!, but for some reason when I played it at Malibu Grand Prix in Northridge, I could make it all the way to Bald Bull, which isn't particularly impressive if you didn't suck at it, but still makes me feel like I accomplished something. One time, I even knocked him down once before he turned me into moosh.

Centipede will always be tied to the smell of mojo potatoes and the din of some sporting event I didn't care about on a projection television at Shakeys Pizza in Tujunga, where this young couple in their 20s with really awesome '70s hair that was beginning to turn into unfortunate '80s hair let me play their last man at the cocktail version because their pizza was ready.

Ms. Pac-Man will always be associated with the head shop in Sunland, where I got to the pretzel level the first time I ever played the game while my mom was, uh, shopping, in that area behind the saloon doors that was just for grown-ups.

Super Pac-Man, Defender, Gyruss, and Mouse Trap drop me through the worm hole into Sunland Discount Variety, a sort of family-run grocery and hardware store that pre-dates minimarts. I can close my eyes right now, and hear the old mechanical cash register and whirring Slush Puppy machine (ten pumps of syrup, please.) I can feel the cool dusty linoleum tiles beneath my bare feet when I stopped on my way back home from the community pool over several childhood summers, the chlorine burning my eyes and lungs, always afraid that the old Chinese man who worked there wouldn't accept my soaking wet dollar bills from my soaking wet pocket, or would enforce the "no shirt, no shoes, no service" policy announced on the front door.

Crystal Castles, Demolition Derby (did anyone ever get to see more of that girl between levels?), and Journey conjure up images of a Bally's Alladin's Castle at the mall in Eugene, Oregon, during the filming of Stand By Me, where my mom took me on my days off. Burger Time and Tutankham will always remind me of the smell of chlorine and concrete from the basement-level pool at the Eugene Hilton where we lived that summer. Lunar Lander reminds me of this Holiday Inn in Redding, California, where we stayed during the filming of Stand By Me's train trestle sequence. It was another indoor pool, but this one had a tropical theme with a giant waterfall, and if you didn't mind a mild electric shock, holding your wet hand over the coin slots gave you free credits.

I really miss those days when Chuck E. Cheese's had more than an assortment of ticket-dispensing coin suckers, I could find arcade games wherever I went, and every mall worth visiting had both a video arcade and an ice skating rink. But the video arcade's days were numbered as soon as home computers and console systems started to catch up to their arcade counterparts. Sadly, in their efforts to keep quarters flowing, I believe arcade owners and video game manufacturers hastened their own demise.

Though the great Home Video Game Crash is widely accepted to have happened in 1983, It was in the early '90s that arcades started to really fall apart, as unique games like Tempest, Robotron, Tapper and Gorf were steadily replaced by games that were all essentially derivative of Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat. While it took entirely different skills to beat Vanguard than it took to beat Crazy Climber than it took to beat Galaxian than it took to beat Dragon's Lair, a fighting game was a fighting game was a fighting game. Jump and leg sweep, mash the buttons, and repeat. Oh! A fatality. Awesome.

In my local arcade, which was called The Enterprise (no relation) and then The Cone Factory (when waffle cones ruled the world around 1985) it started when the sit-down Spy Hunter and Mach 3 were pulled out and replaced with two identical Mortal Kombat machines. Don't get me wrong; those games were fun and I'll still drop the occasional quarter into MKII and see how far I can get, but did we really need an arcade full of them? Where's my Bump-n-Jump? Where's my Wizard of Wor? And who let the damn dogs out? Who? Who? Who?!

As arcades became neglected and the games all blurred together into a beige collection of copycats, home consoles and PCs outpaced their cabinet cousins, and I had a hard time coming up with a good reason to even bother leaving the house. Who wants to go spend a dollar a minute on some fighting game when you can spend forty dollars once for a hundred hours of well-developed story and characters you can get emotionally attached to right at home? I'm bored out of my mind with FPS games now, but when they came out, Doom and Quake were new, and different, and fun. After I grew tired of them, I moved on to RPGs like Fallout 2 and Planescape: Torment, and I didn't miss the arcade experience at all; by the time Vice City came along, quarters were, for the first time in a decade, primarily used in parking meters.

But in the back of my mind, and on long lonely drives where a melancholy saxophone solo seemed to come out of nowhere to accompany me, I'd think about Tron, and Star Castle, and Mr. Do! and Zaxxon. I'd hear the jukebox playing Journey and Judas Priest and Asia and Van Halen. I'd smell the waffle cones and feel the quarters heavily banging against my thigh as they weighed down the pocket of my two-toned corduroy OP shorts, and I wouldn't miss the games as much as I'd miss the places where I played them.

If you're a Generation Xer like me, odds are you have at least one specific arcade you can recall, where you probably spent your weight in quarters every summer. Don't you miss it? Sure, it's fun to play games like Guitar Hero, and the computing power in one Xbox 360 probably exceeds the total computing power of everything combined in Captain Video circa 1982, but wouldn't it be great to walk into a real arcade and choose from thirty or forty different games, all of them unique?

I think the current generation of gamers, though they have access to more actual players than we did, are really missing out on the social and community aspect of the video arcade. Where I would spend my time haunting Discount Variety or the 7-11 with Super Mario Brothers and Gyruss, (and occasionally taking a trip to the Pac Man arcade in Pasadena, a video game Shangrila for those of us who grew up in Sunland/Tujunga) my kids and their friends just play online, and never even see the people they're playing with.

My kids' generation, with their online gaming and its associated sense of anonymity and unaccountability, aren't getting the same social workout that we all got when we were kids. When I played a two player game against another kid and I beat him, if I taunted him mercilessly and made explicit references to his mother's sex life and my role in it, he would have justifiably kicked the everliving shit out of me; so I learned that it was always a good idea to be gracious in victory and defeat. Contrast that with the foul and profane behavior exhibited in today's online gaming worlds, by players who are old enough to know better, or young enough not to care. It takes a lot of fun out of the gaming experience, and eventually results in something out of Lord of the Flies. This type of anti-social behavior spills over onto online communities and has been the subject of funny-because-it's-true comics by Penny Arcade and xkcd.

Yes, arcades were dark and loud and smelled funny, and they probably confused our parents the same way MySpace confuses me, but they were real places where we could escape into countless different worlds, and challenge our friends (and the occasional stranger) for nothing more important than getting our initials on the high score list (it's strange how so many of us had the initials ASS, XXX and SEX isn't it?) Because they were real places, staffed by real people, we had to conduct ourselves with a certain amount of respect, because there weren't rotating proxies and anonymous gamer tags to hide behind. It wasn't about spawn camping or kill-stealing or chat flooding or any of the other childish bullshit that makes so many online games and communities barely tolerable; it was about the interaction with our friends and the challenge these different games presented to us. I'm pretty sure it was about the fun, too.

I know I'm not the first parent to hit his mid-thirties and start demanding that the damn kids get off his lawn — I'm sure my parents were sad as drive-ins were torn down to make way for strip malls, and I'm sure they complained that we were playing in video arcades instead of riding bikes, and watching video tapes instead of going to the movies. I'm sure that my kids will one day complain that my grandkids immerse themselves alone in the holodeck rather than killing boars in the forest or charging into battle with Leeroy Jenkins.

But I do believe that this moment in time is unique, because video arcades are closing all over the place, and this enormously important part of my generation's coming of age will probably be gone forever, unless some billionaire (I'm looking at you, Mark Cuban) decides to open a chain of truly classic 1980s video arcades, complete with Journey and Rush on the jukebox, and dispensers that give us five tokens for a dollar. Hey, there was a resurgence of '50s diners in the '80s, so why not a resurgence of classic '80s arcades in the new millennium? Hell, it could even be a place where the damn kids today and curmudgeons like me could find some common ground.

I call first on Defender.

Wil Wheaton has Pac-Man fever, and the only prescription is more tokens.

 

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swedrock

swedrock

Louisville, KY
October 2005

FEB 07, 2007 02:22 PM

Great piece! This dates me alot, my sons are in their late 20's. We always went to the arcades at the movies on the weekends, but I had Apple IIs at my office and we always had games to play on them. Chop Lifter, Apple Invader, later a Pac Man. In any case last Christmas I brought one of the old Apple IIs out of the basement, cleaned it up and slowly switched in on and off. Finally got it to start. Booted from one of the game floppys and after Christmas dinner everyone played their favorate games from that period of 1979 to 85. Really brought back alot of memories of the kids as they grew up. I'm still good at Choplifter! Must be like riding a bike...

whiteyford

whiteyford

Clermont, FL
February 2005

FEB 07, 2007 02:26 PM

For me...Karate Champ with my best friend at the Time Machine across from the movie theatres in Merritt Island. We'd waste one another heads-up and then watch a movie and troll the mall.

(my high-score moniker was DEF)

+wf+

Oh, and four-player Gauntlet was always a party!!

"wizard needs food badly!!"

MschfMayhemSoap

MschfMayhemSoap

Phoenix, AZ
April 2006

FEB 07, 2007 02:38 PM

I remember a 7-11 with Street Fighter 2...... I was all over that machine for a summer. I always got so pissed when some chode would use Blanka cause of a really cheap combo... Roundhouse-roll attack-Jump kick-dizzy-bite-repeat. GGGGGRRRRRR!!!!!

AceT

AceT

Portland, OR
April 2004

FEB 07, 2007 03:15 PM

Jace said:
The best part in my opinion, being that I'm a huge pinball fanatic, is that the entire second story of the place is devoted to pinball. Most of the machines are older, and they even have some really old and interesting ones like Haunted House and an original Black Knight! This is one of the best places I've ever encountered for pinball, especially older pinball.


Portland also has a pinball league that meets regularly to play there.

I like the Dr. Who and original Star Trek machines.

KidMorlock

KidMorlock

Indianapolis, IN
October 2003

FEB 07, 2007 03:38 PM



1985. Godfather's Pizza Shop. Star Wars coin-op. That summer, I destroyed the Death Star at least a thousand times over. What's weird is that that Pizza shop eventually became a video store that I managed for five years. New releases partly occupied what I called the Star Wars Corner. It actually caught on with the other employees.

Thanks, Wil. I haven't thought about that game in ages. smile

MarginWalker2002

MarginWalker2002

San Diego, CA
April 2004

FEB 07, 2007 05:00 PM

Wasted Youth was where I learned the joys of Xevious, Gauntlet, Wizard of Wor and Robotron 2084. Even better was that my cousin boaught a stand up console of Robotron so everytime we visited Philidelphia, there was much human saving robo-destroying havoc to be had.

Excellent piece, Will. Thank you for the nostalgia.

zyryx

zyryx

Tyler, TX
April 2004

FEB 07, 2007 05:09 PM

it was the time and the arcades that made those games so special. I've played a few of the old classics on XL/360, and it's just not the same...

BennyMac

BennyMac

Barrie, ON
November 2002

FEB 07, 2007 05:18 PM

Go to Dave and Busters, you can play classic games eat pizza and get smashed, all for the low price of about 150 dollars...

Amitiel

Amitiel

USA
October 2006

FEB 07, 2007 05:24 PM

1982- Battlezone in the basement of Sears at the Orange Mall while listening to "Dark Side of the Moon" on one of those early walkmen that were oh-so-large. Played Asteroids, Galaxian, and Galaga in the same place.

1984/85- Playing Tron at the Disneyland "Starcade" during the summers. (Disneyland was super cheap to go to for locals back then).

1987- Playing Gauntlet my freshman year at Cal Poly SLO. "Blue Valkyrie needs food badly!" and for my partner in crime, "Green Elf is about to die . . ."

Good times

smile

Cigarette

Cigarette

Cleveland, OH
April 2004

FEB 07, 2007 05:27 PM

BennyMac said:
Go to Dave and Busters, you can play classic games eat pizza and get smashed, all for the low price of about 150 dollars...



My D&Bs has two retro cabinets and about five hundred thousand FPSs, fighting games, and racing games. And Star Wars.

The four arcade games that will always stick in my mind are:
The Simpsons
X-Men (six players, all fun)
Off-Road
Moonwalker. If only for Super Mike and Bubbles.

thefreak

thefreak

NEWSWIRE

Gardner, MA

FEB 07, 2007 06:18 PM

Both Crystal Castles and Centipede are the shit.

-TM

WilWheaton

WilWheaton

Los Angeles, CA
June 2005

FEB 07, 2007 06:41 PM

Amitiel said:
1984/85- Playing Tron at the Disneyland "Starcade" during the summers. (Disneyland was super cheap to go to for locals back then).

My best friend and I had APs all the way back in 1987 or 1988, and we went there every weekend for at least three years, mostly just to hang out at that arcade.

It makes me so sad that the upper level is a storage room now, and the bottom level is filled with -- big surprise -- DDR and button-mashing games.

OctEgon

OctEgon

Tustin, CA
July 2005

FEB 07, 2007 08:35 PM

My local arcade was Tilt at the Laguna Hills Mall in South OC. Still there, bless it's heart.

But the closest place for video games was 7-11 until the mid 90s. They used to pack at least 2 arcades and a pinball machine at every store. Mine was next door to a baseball card shop and across the street from my comic shop. Triple Threat!

I played the old school games like star wars and centipede, but I didn't make it part of my lifestyle until the Capcom/SNK Fighter Craze of the early 90s. That was when my family would go to Vegas. I remember my parents dropped what seemed like $100 in quarters on my 3 brothers n' I and let us run loose in the Luxor Video Arcade. Nothing could bring a tear to my eye quicker than seeing the official Turbo Street Fighter being played on a giant 12-Screen Monitor.

My big concern though, with arcades going the way of the DoDo, is what's to become of pinball machines? I briefly owned one called Amigo when I was about 12. Got it off a neighbor having a garage sale. Taught me a real appreciation for the game but some faulty wiring put an end to that.

Pinball was where I really shined at 7-11. Plus, they seem to be the exception to the rule that a movie can't make a great game. Dracula, Indiana Jones, Batman, Star Wars. Those were amazing!

Cigarette

Cigarette

Cleveland, OH
April 2004

FEB 07, 2007 08:49 PM

OctEgon said:
My big concern though, with arcades going the way of the DoDo, is what's to become of pinball machines? I briefly owned one called Amigo when I was about 12. Got it off a neighbor having a garage sale. Taught me a real appreciation for the game but some faulty wiring put an end to that.

Pinball was where I really shined at 7-11. Plus, they seem to be the exception to the rule that a movie can't make a great game. Dracula, Indiana Jones, Batman, Star Wars. Those were amazing!



The places I still see pinball machines are bars and concert clubs.

OctEgon

OctEgon

Tustin, CA
July 2005

FEB 07, 2007 10:38 PM

Cigarette said:
The places I still see pinball machines are bars and concert clubs.



That sounds about right. But when was the last time you saw a new pinball game? For me it was that last generation of video/pinball hybrids. Star Wars and some Mars Attacks! ripoff. They were cool, but that was at least 5 year ago.

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