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  • WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 18 2006 12:00 PM

Wil Wheaton's Geek In Review: The Real Revenge of the Nerds

In recent years, geeks have become accepted (assimilated?) into the mainstream. It's hard to pin down one specific reason, but as a life-long geek, I can attest to the difference in social attitudes toward those of us who can quote Holy Grail from start to finish, or scrape an entire porn website's open directories, organize the resulting files and burn them to a CD with an eighteen line Perl script.

Shows like Malcolm in the Middle and Freaks and Geeks feature characters that geeks can identify with without making us a punchline, and websites like Think Geek specifically cater to us with T-shirts and gizmos that proudly shout to the world, "I'm a geek, and I'm proud!" When did we gain this acceptance, and how did it happen?

Set the wayback machine to 1978 and watch Animal House. Then, jump ahead and watch Revenge of the Nerds and Real Genius. While you're in the 80s, check out The Dark Crystal, too (not because it's relevant, but because it's a pretty fun movie to watch, and since you're already there, you may as well go for it. Hey, if you were a geekling back then, you may even recall being terrified out of your fucking mind by the Skeksis like I was.)

Anyway, these films all have one common theme: misfits are persecuted by the establishment, misfits fight back using intellect and guile, win the war, and get the girl. Geeks were apparently paying attention back then, because we learned that even though we were physically awkward and less interested in kickball than we were in the Fiend Folio, we could somehow use our intellect to one day turn the tables on our tormentors; an entire generation of geeks, whether they were aware of it or not—and whether we'll admit it now or not—were motivated to reach levels of power and success as adults so we could get back at them. When the personal computer came into our homes with programming languages pre-installed and we saw that we could create things using our brains, the first step toward that ultimate revenge was taken.

Over the years, those of us who were laughed at and tormented by the cool kids fooled around with our personal computers and sought escape in worlds like William Gibson's Neuromancer where intellect was celebrated and rewarded, while the cool kids spent their time in a superficial world that rewarded feathered hair, flipped-up collars, perfect teeth and careful navigation of what was capriciously deemed "cool" by the hivemind of the moment.

When technology and information became highly-prized commodities in the 90s as we were all getting out of college, those of us who had spent much of the 80s alone in our darkened bedrooms, bathed in the green or amber glow of a personal computer's CRT while we "jacked in" at 300 baud to FidoNet and the few of us who were lucky enough to have access to the real Matrix (ARPANet) when 56k was but a dream for mortals had a head start on an entirely new world. While the popular kids continued what Lester Bangs called "the long journey to the middle," we were using our passion for computers and knowledge to found companies and change the way people communicated with each other. It wasn't long before we became our own demographic, and not just any demographic—a demographic that was inherently smart, and had a lot of disposable income. Suddenly, mainstream companies were marketing to us, and in the dot com boom, we finally threw the massive parties we were never invited to when we were younger. The geeks may not have inherited the Earth, but we certainly had arrived, and now we got a say in what was cool.

I knew some of the computer hackers of the late 80s who were described in The Hacker Crackdown; in the 90s, many of them went to work for AT&T, UUNet, or other backbone Internet providers. They joked that, after years of trying to own the phone systems and the Internet with social engineering and brute force cracking, it had finally happened legitimately. Today, many of them own multi-million dollar security consulting firms. While Google is one assimilation away from being the new Borg, Microsoft rightfully earned that description and embodied it for at most of the last two decades. There's a joke about how much it must suck to be the guy who was Bill Gates' bully, but there's a real kernel of truth to it. I know that if I had anything to do with it, there are a few people who would never be able to quite get that credit rating fixed. Yeah, it's petty, but it takes a long time to get the taste of locker out of your mouth, believe me.

Tony Montana was right when he said, "First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the women." We geeks just substituted computers for power, and, sadly, many of us have substituted home theaters for women . . . well, we are geeks, after all, and girls totally have cooties.

At least we're moderately cool, for the time being, and any cool kid who wants to argue with us better have a damn good firewall.

Wil Wheaton is the author of Just A Geek. His blog is pretty geeky, too.

 

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Comments
malkav11

malkav11

Saint Paul, MN
July 2003

OCT 18, 2006 04:03 PM

If my team was losing I was always the last one out in dodgeball. Dodging hard things impacting on one's face comes naturally to me. So, compared to sports where one was actually meant to interact with the ball, I loved it. I sucked at offense, though.

ninjatoes

ninjatoes

Newport, KY
August 2005

OCT 18, 2006 04:59 PM

yay for geek pride!

grave_chilling

grave_chilling

Bath, ON
September 2006

OCT 18, 2006 05:24 PM

We geeks just substituted computers for power, and, sadly, many of us have substituted home theaters for women . . . well, we are geeks, after all, and girls totally have cooties.



This is one of the funniest Wil Wheaton quotes EVAR!!!!! And a golden statement about STDs...

DrChaos

DrChaos

Lafayette, CA
May 2004

OCT 18, 2006 07:06 PM

I resemble that article! biggrin

And it's sweet, very sweet, to be at a party and when someone asks "So what kind of work do you do", to answer truthfully: "I'm a rocket scientist." biggrin biggrin biggrin

Remember also that some geeks have done things like helping to establish and maintain a
website called suicidegirls. How fucking cool is that?! wink

ninetysevencents

ninetysevencents

Rochester, NY
August 2003

OCT 18, 2006 07:41 PM

For the most part, I would say that you're spot on. It has been not so unbearable being a geek now than it might have been in days past. I admit that it feels kind of good when I'm waiting in line at the bank to deposit a check and some guy who used to be an asshole to me in high school is at the window wearing the same stupid baseball cap he did back then while he makes another payment on his car loan. Ok, so it only happened once, but it was pretty sweet.

Still, I wonder whether geeks are actually taken seriously or just seen as a source of revenue. In a country that devotes an enormous amount of money and effort to the entertainment industry, it can be argued that the content of the entertainment might somehow reflect our values. In the 90's we had Star Trek galore, X-files, Quantum Leap, etc. But now...Enterprise: cancelled, Farscape: cancelled, Firefly: cancelled and more. All that's really left is Battlestar Galactica and a sci-fi network that seems to have gotten the ideas for half its programming from those mad scientists on MST3K. I've even noticed on my tri-weekly drool session at Best Buy that they've reduced the sci-fi DVD section to half a rack. It now has to share with anime and horror. Yeah, both are extremely geeky, but when I turn around I see a family section that has its eyes on that top row of anime. It's only a matter of time. Maybe the market is just adjusting as we're moving our attention to things like filling up iPods, reading online comic strips and multi-player online gaming, but it seriously sucks that the only way I find myself watching decent sci-fi on television is by slipping a DVD into the player.

*Shrug* So maybe it's not all going our way, but when was it ever? I suppose that as long as circuits continue to follow Moore's Law and TV resolutions increase to ridiculously high levels we can consider ourselves happy until reaching that big wedgie-free geek con in the sky.

geekgurl

geekgurl

Philadelphia, PA
June 2003

OCT 18, 2006 07:42 PM

*tilts head in direction of username*

jonzes

jonzes

Madison, WI
July 2003

OCT 18, 2006 08:04 PM

I gotta agree, if you said you were a fan of Spider Man, LOTR, teh internets and killing murlocs with your warlock a few years ago folks would assume you lived in your parents basement. Now you can get that shit at McDonalds.

The amazing thing is I'm starting up a d&d game with some buddies recently... and STILL getting poon-tang! It's a dream come true!

r3v

r3v

San Jose, CA
March 2003

OCT 18, 2006 08:22 PM

Well worded, Will. As a sometimes reader of your blog, this was exactly what I was epecting it to be. Which is to say, funny and spot on. ARRR!!!

genshi

genshi

South Pasadena, CA
May 2003

OCT 18, 2006 10:29 PM

Coming full circle... I was a geek/musician back in the day watching and identifying with some of those movies, and now as a geek musician/ toy-maker the funny thing is, they (the studios) are currently in production on the remake of the Revenge Of The Nerds movie and my toy, the Broken Heart Robot is going to be featured in the movie as the main character's favorite toy in his dorm room! How strange is that!

flyonwall

flyonwall

London, ON
October 2004

OCT 19, 2006 12:03 AM

WilWheaton said:
God, I still fucking hate dodgeball.



wait... there are people in the world that like it?

baudot

baudot

Oakland, CA
February 2004

OCT 19, 2006 12:45 AM

One theory I like is that geeks took over because geekery is actually a hell of a lot of fun, and as time went by, more and more people had to admit they'd thrown a 20 sider or played a computer game, and they liked it. Nowadays there's more of us and fewer of them, and we're still converting.

BlastProcessing

BlastProcessing

USA
OLD SKOOL

OCT 19, 2006 01:43 AM

One day, I hope to do something with my life which allows me to be as brazenly tongue-in-cheek as Wil Wheaton making an "assimilating" joke.

eleven26

eleven26

Brooklyn, NY
August 2003

OCT 19, 2006 05:05 AM

That was goddamn beautiful biggrin

Ahhh, I remember my 300 baud modem. Got it for free from a friend who had just upgraded. *dreamy sigh*

jonze

jonze

Willimantic, CT
December 2005

OCT 19, 2006 09:15 AM

*sniff sniff* I remember mowing lawns so I could get telnet time and play MajorMud.....brings me back....

MadScience_7

MadScience_7

Golden, CO
June 2004

OCT 19, 2006 12:10 PM


Tony Montana was right when he said, "First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the women." We geeks just substituted computers for power, and, sadly, many of us have substituted home theaters for women . . . well, we are geeks, after all, and girls totally have cooties.



And that is precisely why I have suffered for 4 years at the Colorado School of Mines. Though I do plan on getting the women after I get my boat. wink

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