News > Geek > At Last, the Perfect Gift: Animatronic Chimpanzee . . . Head?

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TUESDAY NOVEMBER 8 2005 12:00 PM

At Last, the Perfect Gift: Animatronic Chimpanzee . . . Head?

Submitted by BurningKrome

Edited by WilWheaton

For those of us who loved Teddy Ruxpin...we have a new animatronic toy to warp and entertain our children! Meet Pan Troglodyte! An animatronic, life sized, life-like bust of a Chimpanzee from Hollywood "F/X" animatronics.

So real, it's unreal! "Alive" Chimpanzee (Latin name: pan troglodyte...if you can believe it) is a fully animated, life-size bust of the real animal; he has been painstakingly handcrafted to exacting standards. His appearance is uncannily lifelike with skin and hair and eyes that look and feel genuine. His head and neck as well as his face and eyes move as if "Alive" Chimpanzee were a living thing.

Keen senses. "Alive" Chimpanzee can see, hear and feel in ways that allow him to interact intelligently with you, your family, your guests...and with baffled strangers. His soulful eyes track movements using infrared "radar" vision; his ears have stereoscopic sound sensors; his skin reacts to contact with touch sensors all around. He also boasts "vocal chords" and realistically mimics the authentic sounds of a live chimp appropriately reflecting his emotions.

Emotional moods. The natural emotional state of your "Alive" Chimpanzee is "Curious" one of four distinctive moods; his other emotional states include "Happy," "Fearful" and "Feisty."

Using a myriad of sensors Pan can simulate curiosity, fear, happiness and feistiness (?), has eyes that will follow movement around the room, and will respond to being patted on the head and tickled under the chin. It also comes with a remote control so that you can shape the actions of this devolved talking head from as far away as thirty feet.

However, you only get the head of the living chimp. Apparently the body was a bit much for the designers (or, perhaps, the pocketbook of the clientele.)

And you thought the clown doll from Poltergeist was creepy in the dark.

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Comments

Keith

Oklahoma City, OK

August 2002

NOV 08, 2005 12:02 PM

...and somewhere, someone will try to have sex with it.

BlueCadet

Austin, TX

August 2003

NOV 08, 2005 12:13 PM

That thing is ugly and weird, I hate it.

catatac

San Diego, CA

June 2005

NOV 08, 2005 01:05 PM

PurePhase said:
That thing is ugly and weird, I hate it.

Seconded. Besides, what's the point of having a pet chimp that doesn't fling feces at houseguests?

BurningKrome

San Jose, CA

April 2005

NOV 08, 2005 01:30 PM

ClubsBabySeals said:

Keith said:
...and somewhere, someone will try to have sex with it.

...and end up in the hospital and thusly the story will end up here on these boards.

Karma and Dharma, working together.

[Edited on Nov 08, 2005 by ClubsBabySeals]

LOL

And I pray to God that I am the one to submit it!

pleasepleaseplease

Hooraydiation

Boston, MA

October 2005

NOV 08, 2005 01:36 PM

Those things have souls.

Cash

USA

OLD SKOOL

NOV 08, 2005 01:37 PM

pray...for...mojo

Snottlebocket

Netherlands

March 2004

NOV 08, 2005 01:39 PM

poor bastard can't even defend himself against the double eyepoke.

StarBelliedBoy

Philadelphia, PA

December 2003

NOV 08, 2005 02:37 PM

???

Someguysteve

USA

September 2005

NOV 08, 2005 03:16 PM

Reminds me of this happy little guy. I don't think I like the monkey version though, I can just imagine waking up during a lightning storm then having a flash of light reveal that its smiling and watching me when I remember turning it off. :shivers:.

tehpeanut

Houston, TX

September 2005

NOV 08, 2005 03:58 PM

that would give me nightmares

FrankMask

Saint Paul, MN

June 2003

NOV 08, 2005 05:13 PM

PurePhase said:
That thing is ugly and weird, I hate it.

I don't think hate is strong enough.

Chimp-Pyre is more what I had in mind. Nothing appeals to the my luddite roots like a good tech-burning.

Okay, so, cut the face off, re-apply a handmade latex skin, mount the whole thing on a nice body of some sort, and boom. Guard orc. You could even have re-program the voice circuit to make it cuss in welsh.

[Edited on Nov 08, 2005 by Frank]

PsychicGoldfish

HOPEFUL

Orono, ME

NOV 08, 2005 06:01 PM

*covet*

malkav11

Saint Paul, MN

July 2003

NOV 08, 2005 07:18 PM

Yes, that's definitely worse than the clown doll. That just means someone will do a clown version now.