News > Culture > Comedians Arrested For Telling Lawyer Jokes

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THURSDAY JANUARY 13 2005 3:00 AM

Comedians Arrested For Telling Lawyer Jokes

Submitted by Noctua

Edited by Christopher

Q: "How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?"
A: "His lips move."

This oft-told joke was the first salvo of lawyer jokes told by Harvey Cash and Carl Lanzisera, a pair of comedians, while passing time in line to get into a courtroom in New York state. A lawyer ahead of them in the queue took umbrage at the subject of their humour, reportedly saying, 'Shut up, I'm a lawyer.'

The pair continued with several follow-up jokes before the the offended lawyer complained to court officers, who promptly arrested them for disorderly conduct. (Yahoo! News source) The men describe their arrest experience:

"They put the handcuffs on us, brought us into a room, frisked us, sat us down and checked our driver's licenses to see if there were any warrants out for our arrest," Lanzisera said yesterday. "They were very nasty, extremely nasty."

The comedians are founders of an organization called Americans for Legal Reform.

Americans for Legal Reform monitors the courts and uses confrontational tactics to push for greater access for the public. The pair said that for years they have stood outside courthouses on Long Island and mocked lawyers.

Some of the jokes they are said to have told that got them in trouble:

Q: What do you say to a lawyer with an IQ of 50?

A: Good morning, Your Honor.

Q: How do you tell if a lawyer is lying?

A: His lips are moving.

Q: Why do they bury lawyers 100 feet into the ground?

A: Because down deep, they're good people.

Q: What's the difference between a vulture and a lawyer?

A: Wing tips.

[The editor believes that the two men arrested are the real life inspiration for Waldorf and Stadler.]

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Comments

HenryTMensch

New York, NY

December 2004

JAN 13, 2005 03:06 AM

They were behaving like Waldorf and Stadler in a courthouse.

randomcharacters

I'm lost

August 2004

JAN 13, 2005 03:13 AM

ugh. those jokes are older than the paper that protects their right to tell them

Testm0nkey

I'm lost

March 2004

JAN 13, 2005 03:22 AM

why dont sharks eat lawyers? professional courtesy!
HIYO

...ok fine there goes my act

[Edited on Jan 13, 2005 by Testm0nkey]

D0BERMANN

Quebec, QC

May 2004

JAN 13, 2005 03:26 AM

You think they would have arrested Seinfeld already.

lock

United Kingdom

December 2003

JAN 13, 2005 03:27 AM

what do you call 100 dead lawyers?
A good start!

boom boom

D0BERMANN

Quebec, QC

May 2004

JAN 13, 2005 03:29 AM

What's black & brown and looks nice around a lawyers neck?

SomethingStupid

North Hollywood, CA

March 2004

JAN 13, 2005 03:30 AM

How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?

Take your foot off his head!

The great thing about that lame old joke is that you can apply it to absolutely any person or group you don't like.

That whole thing is pretty funny/asinine though. Although while they shouldn't be arrested for it, they really were being dicks.

[Edited on Jan 13, 2005 by TedKoppel]

abracadabra

Seattle, WA

April 2004

JAN 13, 2005 03:50 AM

"what would Brian Boitano do???"

BurningLeviathan

Australia

January 2005

JAN 13, 2005 04:39 AM

he'd make a plan and he'd follow through

[Edited on Jan 13, 2005 by BurningLeviathan]

Cash

USA

OLD SKOOL

JAN 13, 2005 04:46 AM

HenryTNoob said:
They were behaving like Waldorf and Stadler in a courthouse.

They were behaving like Statler & Waldorf in a courthouse lobby.

Adelayde

Ellicott City, MD

September 2004

JAN 13, 2005 04:54 AM

maybe i could understand, if they were actually in the courtroom, in front of the judge... but in a fucking lobby? jesus christ. people need to stop taking offense to everything someone says. a joke is a joke.