• news
  • FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 10 2004 10:00 AM

You Might Be a Redneck If...

Submitted by KaraLynn

Edited by _Sarah_

....you attack your girlfriend with an alligator.

A Port Orange, FL man pleaded no contest to misdemeanor charges of battery and illegal possession of an alligator.

David Havenner was keeping the animal in his tub. When a spat broke out between him and his girlfriend, Nancy Monico, the alligator became the most obvious weapon, along with empty beer bottles.

Havenner told investigators that Monico bit his hand because she was upset that they had run out of alcohol.

  • PERMALINK
  • PRINT
  • Digg This
  • Email To A Friend
 
Comments
KaraLynn

KaraLynn

Beverly Hills, CA
April 2004

SEP 10, 2004 10:32 AM

Bawahahahahahaha..........

Everyone here just but bumped up the white trash ladder by this guy.

For future reference folks reptiles attack with a sideways snapping action of the neck. Head on isn’t an option. So the next time someone comes at you with a reptile remember that. Forget the rub it’s belly shit.



[Edited on Sep 10, 2004 10:39AM]

SurfBetty

SurfBetty

Atlantic Beach, FL
December 2003

SEP 10, 2004 10:34 AM

yeah that was on the CE board a month or so ago....the guy just got charged/convicted of it yesterday or something though.....



i was gonna say....you might be a redneck...if you are in my family...haha, kidding...kinda tongue

KaraLynn

KaraLynn

Beverly Hills, CA
April 2004

SEP 10, 2004 10:37 AM

SurfBetty said:

i was gonna say....you might be a redneck...if you are in my family...haha, kidding...kinda tongue



Even so, you just got bumped up by this guy.

Now that I think about it, I don't think there is any might to it. You Know You are a Red Neck if you attack someone with an alligator.

edited for poor spelling

[Edited on Sep 10, 2004 10:38AM]

brainlesswonder

brainlesswonder

Pitman, NJ
September 2004

SEP 10, 2004 11:01 AM

ahh.. rednecks. The only group that liberals didn't throw under their PC umbrella.

Although this does create a funny image of what a redneck self defense course for women might look like.

- alligator defense
- how to dodge a flying Coors Light can
- unload his shotgun when he is sleeping

Lain

Lain

Astoria, NY
April 2004

SEP 10, 2004 11:29 AM

Wasnt this already posted on foxnews.com about 3 weeks ago?

_Sarah_

_Sarah_

Kalamazoo, MI
January 2003

SEP 10, 2004 11:32 AM

Lain said:
Wasnt this already posted on foxnews.com about 3 weeks ago?


Possibly. This is the follow-up.

KaraLynn

KaraLynn

Beverly Hills, CA
April 2004

SEP 11, 2004 05:44 PM

He got his sentencing. That is why it came to the news again. A 6 month jail sentence.

featured interviews