Miss Truth Hurts: Advice That Rocks by Carrie Borzillo-Vrenna

Too embarrassed to talk to your friends about your furry fetish? Not sure when to tell your partner about those, um, nasty genital warts? Are your friends sick and tired of you running to them every time that frenemy of yours pisses you off? Not sure how to get your foot in the door of that fab new career you want? I got you covered. Miss Truth Hurts is here to answer all of your love, life, sex, career, and relationship questions. Ask anything. I've been there/done that (except for the warts) and I've dished out advice to readers just like you through the pages of my advice book/lifestyle guide, Cherry Bomb: The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a Better Flirt, a Tougher Chick, and a Hotter Girlfriend, and to Living Life Like a Rock Star.

Send your questions, dilemmas, and conundrums to email: misstruthhurts@suicidegirls.com. Alternatively, SG members can send a message via the site to MissTruthHurts.



Q: I get depressed or just low around the holidays. I don't know why. What can I do to snap out of it?

— Sad in Salt Lake City

A: First of all, it's really normal to get depressed around the holidays. There's a lot of stress with having to see family and attend parties that you might not want to go to and everyone else seems happy but you. I get it. I talked to Shirley Manson recently during an interview about depression a bit and she had some great advice on the topic.

The first thing she said was that we sometimes get caught up in our feelings, but feelings aren't necessarily the truth. For example, maybe you feel unloved or unwanted, but the truth is that you are not unloved. Your family loves you and wants you around. So the first thing to do when that dark cloud starts looming overhead is to really take stock of what you are feeling. Stop yourself and ask honestly if what you are upset or depressed about is your twisted take on things, or if it's really real.

Shirley Manson explained it best when she told me, "You can make your thoughts change. Someone once told me, 'Shirley your feelings are highjacking your brain. It's holding a gun against your head and you are paralyzed by your feelings. Nobody cares about your feelings. Your feelings don't mean shit.' And it took a mile for that penny to drop. And she's right. She said, 'You keep running up against the wall, banging your head against the wall, turning around and you're all bloody and you're wondering why nothing has changed. You need to change your mind and you need to walk behind the wall. Just change your mind, walk around the wall. The wall won't change. You change."

If that doesn't snap you out if, then Shirley Manson suggests this as one small step to feeling better: "Find what turns you on and do it. And maybe you don't know what turns you on and it's your job to figure that out. But the point is, do something."



Q: I'm recently sober, in AA, and I'm not comfortable going to parties yet and being around alcohol. It's especially hard with all of the holiday parties. Should I avoid the parties totally or go and just drink my soda or what?

— Sober in South Detroit

A: The holidays can be rough for sober people. I have a few in my life and for those who have sober long, it's not a problem. For those who are newly sober, it's a bit more difficult. I think you should talk to your AA sponsor about this for the best answer. In addition to that, maybe you can host your own sober holiday party with your AA buddies and other sober friends that you trust so you can still partake in the festivities without any fear. You can also find like-minded people with similar issues by joining SG's own Sobriety Group. Good luck!



Q: I want to buy my girlfriend a vibrator or something sexy for Christmas but I'm not really sure if she'll think it's selfish or what I should get. Any suggestions?

— Lusty in L.A.

A: Sex toys are great stocking stuffers! If you buy right, you'll soon you'll be stuffing more than her stocking! But, give her a romantic, sweet, cool, or cute gift too. If you just give her sex toys, she will have nothing to tell her family about!

Here are some ideas:

Sex Wear
My pal Tera Patrick has some cute lingerie and girlie Ts. You can order her Mistress Couture line HERE. The SuicideGirl's shop also has some seXXXy and fun bed and play attire.

Sex Games
Sexpert Dr. Ava Cadell's Tantric Lovers Game is a lot of fun. So is a good old-fashioned game of Twister, if you're wearing the right outfit –– or nothing at all. X-Rated Rules say: You get to lick whatever your tongue can hit!

Sex Toys
Guest SG columnist Margaret Cho is in love with her Hitachi Magic Wand, so if you're feeling generous you may want to give your girlfriend this Cadillac of vibrators, which Good Vibrations are selling for $52 right now. And for the cutest little vibrator of all, the small pink pocket rocket is the way to go (and a steal at under $10 on Amazon.com).



Carrie Borzillo-Vrenna is Suicide Girls' sex, love, and life advice columnist. She is an entertainment journalist, rock wife, and author of Cherry Bomb: The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a Better Flirt, a Tougher Chick, and a Hotter Girlfriend, and to Living Life Like a Rock Star and Eyewitness Nirvana: The Day-by-Day Chronicle.

www.myspace.com/carrieborzillovrenna
www.carriebv.com

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