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  • SUNDAY AUGUST 31 2008 6:00 AM

All Hail Frog Jesus

I'm not sure what it says about your belief system or religion, when it can't weather even the tiniest of insults. Shouldn't the one true way be stronger than that? Shouldn't the rantings of idiots be easily dismissed and ignored?

Not according to the Catholic Church, angered by another in a long line of seemingly harmless stunts/pranks/arts. (Yes, I'm far from the first to point this out and it is far from groundbreaking or even noteworthy... I realize that, and yet, it still kinda has to be said.)

An art museum in northern Italy said Thursday it will continue displaying a sculpture portraying a green frog nailed to a cross that has angered Pope Benedict XVI and local officials.


Angered? Because someone, somewhere doesn't believe what you believe and in fact, finds it laughable? Do you try to fight everyone who disagrees with you, or only people who target things important to you? Do you try to go after everyone who ever called your country dumb or your mom fat? That's a lot of fights to fight, no?

The board of the foundation of the Museion in the city of Bolzano voted to keep the work by the late German artist Martin Kippenberger, the museum said in a statement.
Earlier in August the pope had written a letter to Franz Pahl, the president of the Trentino-Alto Adige region that includes Bolzano, denouncing the sculpture.
It "has offended the religious feelings of many people who consider the cross a symbol of God's love and of our redemption," Pahl quoted the pope as writing in the letter.



People should not be protected from being offended.

Also, I think they're missing the point here. I'm not so sure this was really an art piece. Think about it, if this guy was chosen to be the messenger of our new frog god, and he came right out and said it, he'd be a laughing stock. He had to claim it's art.

But I've got a feeling this is real... After the false messiah that was Kermit we're all a little hesitant to believe, but he's here to show us the way! I mean, with global warming melting the ice caps and causing the oceans to rise, who better than an amphibious god to lead us to our watery, moss-covered promise land!

Yay Frog God!! Going green suddenly makes so much sense! And man do I feel bad for the French... Frog God leaps higher than all the other gods combined! And he'll get you high if you lick him! Top that, other gods!

Pahl himself has long opposed the display of "Zuerst die Fuesse" ("First the Feet" in German), even staging a hunger strike this summer and saying he would not seek re-election unless it was removed.
In a telephone interview with The Associated Press on Thursday, Pahl said he was outraged by the museum's decision to keep the work, which he claims "pokes fun at the Catholic population and offends religion and the pope."


How'd that hunger strike go? Maybe he only dined on flys? Something we'd all better get used to, I'm guessing.

The 1990 wooden sculpture shows the crucified frog nailed through the feet and hands like Jesus Christ. The frog, eyes popping and tongue sticking out, wears a loincloth and holds a mug of beer and an egg in its hands.


Beer and breakfast... you gotta like that. I've prayed for both on many occasions, good to see new god has his priorities in line with my own.

The museum said the 3-foot (1-meter) -tall sculpture has nothing to do with religion, but is an ironic self-portrait of the artist and an expression of his angst.
"With humor and a tragicomic sense, which belongs to art since the times of Greek tragedy, Kippenberger ... faces his condition of suffering, which he expresses in many works, also, for example, in a video in which he crucifies himself," the museum said in a statement.


Wow, now I really hope he's shepherding in the new Frog era and not uh... making pretentious bullshit.

Please Frog God... show me a sign! I want to believe! Put a lilly pad in my bath tub or... well, I'll leave it up to you. (Moments later TCK goes to his closet for a towel and is hit with a falling diver's flipper - then collapses on the ground in tears and prayer.)

Born in Dortmund, Kippenberger moved from painting and sculpture to work in all mediums, often combining elements of Neo-expressionism, Pop and Dadaism. His art has been displayed across the world, including Zurich, Paris, Jerusalem, London and New York.



Jerusalem!? Isn't that where, ahem, someone else was from? Or visited? Something? Eh, I've never been a fan of those other religions, but sign me up for beer-drinking, hoppy god asap...





TheCoolerKing is equally annoyed by both sides of this story.

Check back each Sunday for more from TheCoolerKing.

 
Comments
McDougal

McDougal

Zion, IL
August 2006

AUG 31, 2008 08:35 AM

I am offended that my frog god has offended. I'm thinking that we, the followers of frog god, must go to war with those offended. It's the only course of action that makes any sense.

Drake

Drake

SUICIDEGIRL

I'm lost

AUG 31, 2008 11:25 AM

The museum said the 3-foot (1-meter) -tall sculpture has nothing to do with religion, but is an ironic self-portrait of the artist and an expression of his angst.

"With humor and a tragicomic sense, which belongs to art since the times of Greek tragedy, Kippenberger ... faces his condition of suffering, which he expresses in many works, also, for example, in a video in which he crucifies himself," the museum said in a statement.




Wow, now I really hope he's shepherding in the new Frog era and not uh... making pretentious bullshit.



Come on... portraying yourself as a beer-drinking frog is like the exact opposite of pretentious!

Kleio

Kleio

Winona, MN
January 2006

AUG 31, 2008 11:34 AM

I wouldn't go so far as to call Kermit a false messiah. Prophet, quite possibly, and if nothing else a charming ambassador sent to spread the love of our dear and froggy Lord.

fingerbo

fingerbo

New York, NY
January 2003

AUG 31, 2008 04:20 PM

What's doubly stupid and thin-skinned about the Holy Papa's reaction is that Jesus wasn't the only guy to be crucified. It was a common method of public execution. So, this is just some crucified cartoon froggy.

My bigger issue is the "art" looks like something you'd buy at a novelty store, but that's a matter of defining what is "art," and that's a whole other can o' worms. An intangible one.

TheCoolerKing

TheCoolerKing

NEWSWIRE

Los Angeles, CA

AUG 31, 2008 05:11 PM

Kleio said:
I wouldn't go so far as to call Kermit a false messiah. Prophet, quite possibly, and if nothing else a charming ambassador sent to spread the love of our dear and froggy Lord.


Good point... Like the Frog Moses maybe...

Azadeth

Azadeth

Fairport, NY
August 2006

AUG 31, 2008 05:39 PM

"Maybe he only dined on flys?"

I think you mean "flies."

SoulRiver

SoulRiver

Columbus, OH
January 2005

AUG 31, 2008 07:12 PM

TheCoolerKing said:

Kleio said:
I wouldn't go so far as to call Kermit a false messiah. Prophet, quite possibly, and if nothing else a charming ambassador sent to spread the love of our dear and froggy Lord.


Good point... Like the Frog Moses maybe...



He croaked for our sins.

Mythos_

Mythos_

Germany
March 2008

AUG 31, 2008 11:34 PM

The Esoteric Order of Dagon knew it all the time.

Accuser

Accuser

Scottsdale, AZ
October 2006

SEP 01, 2008 03:24 AM

I think I'm going to nail my Buddy Jesus to a cross. I'm sure that's somehow offensive.

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

SEP 01, 2008 03:46 AM

i dunno, i read the first couple paragraphs, and after reading about angry pope, this:

Pope Benedict XVI ANGRY!, Pope Benedict XVI SMASH!

kept running through my head, with the image of the pope all green and muscly, with a torn and tattered pope hat on, and i couldn't concentrate on the rest of the story.

flabajaba2213

flabajaba2213

Plymouth, MA
July 2006

SEP 01, 2008 06:29 PM

666Irish said:
Pssshhh.

Everyone knows the the Newt is the one true amphibious God!



LIES! You are just trying to deceive us from the glory that is our froggy lord!