"The Ultimate Fighter" is the Best Reality Show on TV

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It is and I'll tell you why.

Despite what people say, reality shows are not about singing, fashion, being the best, watching someone follow their dreams, or surviving. Nope.

Reality shows are about assholes. Spotting assholes, watching them develop, and then rooting against them. That's really it. Whether it's Survivor, Apprentice, Top Chef, or even Project Runway, that's ultimately what it's about. And on most shows, the crowning moment, the best you can hope for, is waiting for that asshole to get kicked off the show, and maybe, yelled at in the process.

On The Ultimate Fighter, that asshole gets punched in the face, and you get to watch it. Then he gets kicked in the neck, dropped on his head, submitted, aaaannnnd then he gets kicked off the show.

It's the only reality show where the one thing we're all dying to see, is pretty much guaranteed to happen. And it is awesome.

Sure, sometimes that guy wins, but then a week or two later he's gotta fight again. And even if he wins then, and somehow goes on to win the show, that just means he'll be pitted against a UFC veteran, who will in all likelihood, pummel him. You get to follow this person's career and root against them for the rest of their life, and eventually, you get to see them lose. It's a satisfaction no other show can deliver.

Wouldn't you like to watch Omarosa from Apprentice get yelled at in some boardroom two years from now? How about Mr. "Not here to make friends," himself, Howie from Top Chef? Wouldn't you like watch some restaurant owner chew him out before chasing him from the kitchen and onto the dining room floor with pots whizzing by his head? Oh, trust me, it'll happen to the ole "Vanilla Gorilla," but you won't get to see it.

On the other hand, last month I got to watch Ultimate Fighter season one villain, Josh Koscheck, lose his undefeated record and get thoroughly dismantled by the most devastating welterweight on Earth, Georges St. Pierre. (For the record, even though with a name like "Georges" it sounds like there's more than one of him, and despite Koscheck's battered face telling another story, he's just one man.)

Way back in season one, Koscheck, and castmate Chris Leben got into a brief skirmish in the house. The producers pulled them aside in order to decide on a course of action. The moment on any other show where one guy would be asked to leave or assigned sessions with a psyhchiatrist. The solution on this show? "I don't care who started it, you're both gonna fight and the loser goes home." Yeah, that's a pretty good reality show and it has no equal.

The Contender? Sure, it has fighting, too. It also has edited matches, bad sound effects, and melodramatic music piped in for everything from fight walkouts to a guy making a sandwich. Where TUF is exciting, this show is dramatic... and heartwarming... and triumphant... and... whatever other emotion they decide you should be feeling at that moment.

Survivor? Is this show still on? It shouldn't be. If I wanted to look at a douchbag in a canvas cowboy hat blow into a conch shell I'd... I'd have bigger problems than what to watch on TV.

The Apprentice? The Ultimate Fighter has the advantage here in that Donald Trump isn't on The Ultimate Fighter. That's usually the mark of a good reality show, Trump's absence. Oh, and businessmen are boring and shouldn't be on TV.

Top Chef? Any show that features Anthony Bourdain mocking people is okay in my book, but he's only been on two episodes.

American Idol? Just... No.

Project Runway? Pretty good, but I notice a flaw. Maybe you've noticed it too, very rarely does host, Tim Gunn, choke anyone unconscious. Disappointing. If he had, specifically last season's winner, Jeffrey Sebelia, maybe I'd rank it higher.


The Ultimate Fighter debuts on SPIKE TV tomorrow. Feel free to watch it and tell me I'm wrong. 16 fighters, 1 UFC contract, and too many punches and kicks to count.

Most of which will be landing on an asshole.






TheCoolerKing has never actually watched The Apprentice, and yet, still feels fine judging it.

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