Secret Photoshop Agent and resident Fashion Icon Zoetica often has the staff at SGHQ asking, "What's Zo Wearing?" Her unique and eccentric style is a rallying call to those who suffer from mainstream malaise. Each week, she tells us how she's combined ordinary items to create her extraordinary look. Undaunted by unusual combinations, "What's Zo Wearing" is SG's answer to middle-of-the-road makeover shows.

















In honor of the break from overt frills I decided to take a major step. I bought jeans.

My first pair in over something like 13 years! It's been so long that I can't quite recall exactly why I decided to hate jeans in the first place. In a day [or several decades] when jeans have become nothing short of a uniform for the bland, it's easy to see why I hesitated. Now it matters not, for I am over it! I have vowed not to default to jean-based outfits on the less-inspired days, and to treat this gunmetal blackish grey acquisition as any other pair of pants, a wardrobe item to be respected and properly accessorized. And...Ilove them.

The process of shopping for these was an adventure in itself. On advice of courtneyriot I risked it all and went to Urban Outfitters in that god-forsaken town known as Pasadena. Pasadena, where the frat boys roam free, drunk on testosterone and pussy excess. And just drunk, really. At least they were by the time I was finished the somewhat excruciating process of jean-shopping!

I tried on no less than seven pairs, becoming more confused and frightened with each one. Everything was somehow too big, which, as a girl with 37" hips, is not a problem I often face when it comes to pants. When clothes shopping, I want efficiency. By no means do I enjoy being trapped in hostile fluorescent zones of "cool," struggling to break free from a towering pile of denim accumulating in a small dressing room. Is there no real sizing standard? Why should I have to walk away with a pair of pants marked as a 28?! I demand my efficient 32! ARROOOGH!! In any case, I was , eventually, victorious, and celebrated the spoils with some sweet, sweet Piraat in a great little pub called Lucky Baldwin's. Thanks, Pasadena! And thus it is confirmed once more -- just try it on. And find a pub, after.

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Jeans: Urban Outfitters
Grey 3/4 sleeve top -- Urban Outfitters
Vest: H&M
Shoes: electriqueboutique.com
Bag: any Monokuro Boo purveyor should have these. i love it because the exterior pockets are perfect for my phone and compact
accessories: eBay

Zoetica Ebb is a painter, SG style technician, alt. model, photgrapher & occasional cosmonomad. For further details, visit Zoetica's member page, or her portfolio website, BioRequiem.