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'Jane’ Magazine to Help Deflower 29-Year-Old Virgin

WEDNESDAY AUGUST 23 2006 11:00 AM

Submitted by PopMonger. Edited By PopMonger.

TAGS: Jane, magazine, virgin, Sarah DiMuro

A 29-year-old woman says she wants to lose her virginity before she turns 30... and she's asking Jane magazine for help.

Catholic-raised Sarah DiMuro says she "never went all the way before because I didn’t feel right." Clearly she’s over it. Sarah is trusting Jane magazine to hook her up with a few good men in the hope that one of them will ultimately get to home plate.

"Me, I haven't done so much with my life in terms of social stuff. So this is my adventure - with a kind of scientific method."

Sarah attributes her virginal state to a shy childhood, a pimple-ridden adolescence, and an all-girls' school education.

DiMuro, who says her first kiss with a boy didn't happen till she was 23, won't discuss her sexual experiences at the all-female Smith College ("What happens at Smith stays at Smith"), but has signed a legal document attesting to her chaste condition.

Sarah, who moonlights as a stand-up comic and writer, will chronicle her dating adventures on her blog.

Pressure’s on, though. Sarah turns 30 on November 7th.

The virginal Sarah

14 Comments

ShaggyVixe

New Orleans, LA

November 2005

AUG 23, 2006 11:07 AM

Oh boy! Couldn't she just sell it on eBay or Craigslist like a normal person......

zyryx

Tyler, TX

April 2004

AUG 23, 2006 11:10 AM

it's all about the 15 minutes. if it was about losing it, she could pick up some drunk guy at her local bar...

AndersWolleck

Astoria, NY

February 2003

AUG 23, 2006 11:18 AM

abracadabra

Seattle, WA

April 2004

AUG 23, 2006 11:23 AM

wow..people really lead sheltered lives huh?..shouldn't this be on the silliness board?..cause it's ridiculous..woah..that's scary

FunkySkunk

Gainesville, FL

July 2004

AUG 23, 2006 11:31 AM

Sorry.. had to do it

Edit: I know its not sized right, I'm too lazy to resize and I'm too stubborn to take it down altogether. We will just have to live with it.

Cyprian

Boulder, CO

November 2005

AUG 23, 2006 11:32 AM

America, if we can't give this girl some dick then the terrorists have already won.

Cyprian

Boulder, CO

November 2005

AUG 23, 2006 11:35 AM

I sense another reality TV show in the works: "Pimp my Hymen"

Maximus_73

Edmonton, AB

September 2003

AUG 23, 2006 11:43 AM

LOL

Argene

Columbia, SC

June 2004

AUG 23, 2006 11:48 AM

FunkySkunk said:

Sorry.. had to do it

Edit: I know its not sized right, I'm too lazy to resize and I'm too stubborn to take it down altogether. We will just have to live with it.

Have you seen American Dad? The episode when the CIA director (Patrick Stewart) starts sleeping with Stan's daughter?

"Promotion!"

EmperorNorton

Abington, PA

July 2005

AUG 23, 2006 12:42 PM

AndersWolleck said:

Runaway virgin!

Kabbiebar

Citrus Heights, CA

November 2002

AUG 23, 2006 12:48 PM

Is this really the kind of problem that the full weight of a national magazine needs to be thrown behind to solve?

The answer is no. no it is not.

FridgeMagnet

Chicago, IL

November 2004

AUG 23, 2006 01:15 PM

MaximumKabbalist said:
Is this really the kind of problem that the full weight of a national magazine needs to be thrown behind to solve?

The answer is no. no it is not.

Uh, it's Jane magazine not The Economist, those fuckers have nothing better to do.

And as for the chick, she needs to do a full on 18 page photo layout complete with Spread Teh Leg and PSFB, and then I'll decide if I'll grace her poon-tang with my man sword.