Arrested Development: The Movie!
SUNDAY FEBRUARY 10 2008 6:00 AM
Submitted by TheCoolerKing. Edited By erin_broadley.
Yes, it's not just wishful thinking. According to this recent and widely reported article, the gloriously dysfunctional Bluth famliy that introduced us to the "never nude" is back. Chocolate-dipped, frozen banana stands, Segway treks and ambitiously amateur street illusions gone awry ... It's not just back, but it's tempting the silver screen.
Jason Bateman has just confirmed to me that the creative minds behind Arrested Development (Mitch Hurwitz and Ron Howard) have put the wheels in motion toward a major motion picture of the Fox TV comedy so many of us adore. I'm told by insiders that Jason and other Bluth family members have received calls from producers (Hurwitz and Howard) asking if they would be willing to shoot a movie.
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Jeffrey Tambor also revealed on XM Radio's the Ron and Fez Show that he has been approached by Ron Howard to see if he's willing to do an Arrested film.
And, maybe, for the two or three of you who feel the show ran its course, said all it needed to say and that anything more would be an amalgamated bit of excess, there's this:
Insiders also tell me that while creator Mitch Hurwitz does not yet have a script, he has a good, solid understanding of what he'd like to do for the movie, and Universal is very much interested.
Amazing. That is easily the best news I've heard all week. (Sorry "newborn son," that's just how I feel. Maybe some day you'll be able to give me the joy and laughter that that show delivered for three seasons... but, let's be honest, that's pretty unlikely.)
More than amazing, that news has entered into legit, "too good to be true" territory. And yet, there it is, in print, with quotes and everything. Part of me just wants to "wait" for the movie. Do nothing but sit there and pine for the impending wave of incredible. An overreaction, you might say, if this were a conversation. Well, can you think of better entertainment related news? I tried to, and in spite of the initial, head-exploding factor I managed to tamp down, here's what I came up with.
Things That Come Close to Being as Exciting as the News of an Arrested Development Movie
-- The announcement of a new show consisting of nothing but Dennis Farina punching people in the face. Specifically, Dennis enters a bare room, walks over to the chair, then punches the person seated in the chair. Maybe 10 of these per show? I bet they could even work out some sort of product placement for different chairs. Dennis punching Jon Cryer on a Barcalounger! Dennis decking the guy from "Survivor" on a folding chair! Dennis clobbering this fellow on a lyre-backed dining chair!
-- Carlos Mencia getting deported. Ahh, the sweet, sweet irony. "Carlos" finally forced to reveal his non-Mexican lineage, yelling in vain about actually being a German/Honduran, whose name is actually Ned Holness...
-- "The Wire" getting another season... and then another... One more, after that, who's up for it? Infinity?
-- Jay Leno's upcoming retirement. Actually, the week before his retirement, for him to suffer the same fate "cops in movies" suffer the week before theirs. No, not death, merely a hospital stay that invigorates some new hotshot out to avenge him, coupled with the utterance of the phrase, "I'm getting too old for this shit."
-- The announcement of no more "Bud Light: Real Men of Genius" ads. Let's be honest, making piss-poor swill for undemanding types to suck down during happy hour is a full-time job. Stick to it, and leave the warmed over comedy to Jay Leno. (Not technically entertainment news but, they seem to find themselves pretty entertaining, so they're on the list.)
Things Equal in Excitement to the News of an Arrested Development Movie
-- A "Deadwood" movie. Or, at the very least, the two HBO movies we were promised.
-- Joss Whedon getting a new show. A show which is (not to get greedy) actually promoted and then aired in the correct order.
-- The WGA strike ending. This one looks close to happening. At last.
However, make note: The fact that this happened (is happening?) should not in any way increase your hope of the prior entrant in this category also happening. The odds are still less than those of Floyd Mayweather ever fighting someone with a pulse.
-- The part of my brain that retains the memory of Juno, getting plucked out by a skilled and covered-by-my-insurance surgeon. He then uses that brain sliver to clone a beast that will seek out and destroy the ridiculously named screenwriter responsible, preferable before she can write so much as a grocery list. (A list no doubt filled with vintage Mr. T cereal and neon shoe-laces. Hah!) He will not record her last "quirky, deadpan" reference. Perhaps something hilarious involving Conrad Bain! And M.A.S.H. notes! And remember that other thing!)
Things Greater in Excitement to the News of an Arrested Development Movie
-- The ghosts of Steve McQueen and Lee Marvin coming back from the dead to, um, make more movies, fight robots and crime and um... also, uh, shit, I'm blanking... Er, yell at terrorists and, like, hang out and shit!
--Nothing else.
TheCoolerKing is proud to celebrate his 17th SG reference to Mr. Lee Marvin
















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