Simple Simon, C'mon Why Man

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It’s always a mistake to assume because you’re the best at one specific thing, that you can then pick another thing at random and also be great.

A hilarious, often enjoyable to watch, mistake. Michael Jordan playing baseball, “Magic” Johnson hosting a talk show, Emeril starring in a sitcom. Russell Crowe releasing an album… Somehow, the list goes on and on.

It’s mostly athletes and performers who make this mistake. Rarely does a carpenter suddenly decide to try his hand at accounting. Nor do you often see a tow-truck driver attempting to perform spinal surgery. Part of this could be attributed to the fact that most tow-truck drivers don’t surround themselves with half a dozen hanger-ons spouting, “You’re the best!” every eleven seconds.

Despite these humiliating public examples more and more celebs continue to make this mistake.

"American Idol" star and reality TV producer Simon Cowell is venturing into features with a music-themed project tentatively titled "Star Struck."
Inspired by Alan Parker's 1980 film "Fame," "Star Struck" is set behind the scenes of a TV singing competition in the vein of "Idol" and the Cowell-produced British show "X-Factor" and follows 10 contestants trying to make it to the top.
Well, according to the above paragraph, Fame was already a movie. Perhaps you could try getting inspired by something that isn’t a film? Songs for example, sometimes they’re inspired by a woman. Or by an untimely death. Very rarely do you hear someone say, “Here is my new song, it is inspired by Led Zeppelin’s 'Stairway to Heaven.'”

"The story is told through the eyes of those 10 contestants," said Cowell, who will produce "Struck." "We want it to be the musical version of 'Rocky' -- an underdog story, a feel-good film."
Again, Rocky was already a movie. A great one. About a hundred other films have been “based” on it. Soccer, dancing, even singing, have all been forced into the Rocky mold with varying results.

A singing reality show is a perfect setting to make the story in the film relatable, Cowell said. "'Fame' was all about young people wanting to be famous, and in order to do that, they enrolled in a drama school," Cowell said. "The difference 25 years later is that everyone who wants to be famous today signs up for 'American Idol."'
Yes, those are some HUGE differences. This story needs to be told. And retold. I don’t watch American Idol but I’m guessing that those who do don’t sit there watching it, saying, “This is cool, but I’d love to see a campy, poorly-acted, version of it complete with a pre-determined ending.”

The ONLY reason people watch this show is to:

1) mock some nut-job

2) root for someone from their hometown

3) watch a genuine competition

4) listen to shitty songs

This movie will only be able to deliver number 4.

For authenticity, the leads in the film -- playing participants in a TV singing competition -- will be cast through nationwide open call auditions similar to those used on the reality shows. Cowell, who hopes to hold the calls early next year in seven or eight cities, believes casting unknowns for the leads is crucial.

"To enjoy the film, you've got to watch the actors and believe that they are contestants on a reality show," he said.
You know who I’d suggest for that job? Actors. Professional ones.

Just as he does as a judge on "Idol" and "X-Factor," Cowell will be at the auditions for the movie…

After meeting a number of writers early on, he picked British TV scribe Jonathan Harvey. On Wednesday, Cowell signed off on Harvey's synopsis for "Struck" and is moving forward with the film…
Of course. Who better to judge the nuances of the complex art forms that are acting and writing, than a guy who had an idea for a reality show.

"We always believed that a TV show like 'Idol' would be successful," Cowell said. "I have the same feeling about doing the movie."
Look out tow-truck drivers, surgeons and accountants; he’ll soon be butchering your vocations as well.




TheCoolerKing acknowledges that the title of this piece is the worst pun ever written... by far.

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