News > Celeb > Michael Vick: The Ultimate Celebretard

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THURSDAY JULY 26 2007 8:00 PM

Michael Vick: The Ultimate Celebretard

Submitted by Rahodeb

Edited by Rahodeb

Tags: Michael Vick Dog Fighting Pit Bull

By now we've learned that many celebrities (or celebretards, as I like to call them) don't exactly demonstrate the sharpest judgment skills. We've gaped and gawked at the lame excuses they've offered for their astonishing stupidity: Paris "didn't know her license was suspended," and Lindsay "was wearing someone else's pants." Uh huh.

But Michael Vick claiming that he "didn't know" what was happening on his property and pleading "not guilty" to dog fighting charges today is too much. His Nov. 26 trial date can't come soon enough. No matter which name you call him by, Michael Vick (AKA Ron Mexico, AKA Ookie) is a fucking celebretard of the highest order.

His 10-year, $130 million contract and (quickly dwindling) $7 million yearly endorsement portfolio have obviously warped his brain and led him to believe that he's above the law. His incredible stupidity and gall would almost be comical if not for the numerous dogs that he forcibly bred, trained to be killers, tortured, injected, tethered to car axles, starved, shot, electrocuted and drowned.

Dan Shannon of the People for Ethical Treatment of Animals, said lack of prosecution is [a] reason why dog fighting has not grabbed headlines.

"Unfortunately, it doesn't get brought to justice that often," he said. "People don't hear about it because there's not a lot of high profile cases."

The potential silver lining here is that as a celebretard, Michael Vick's fame has brought to light (and hopefully will bring to an end) the cruel and barbaric activity of dog fighting.

Mr. Vick faces a maximum penalty of six years in jail and a $350,000 fine if convicted. The N.F.L. could also take punitive action against Mr. Vick, perhaps jeopardizing the 10-year, $130 million contract he signed with the Falcons in 2002.

Not to mention probable, upcoming charges of racketeering based on the gambling aspects of dogfighting.

Do they have rape stands in prison?

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Comments

FearTheReaper

NEWSWIRE

I'm lost

JUL 27, 2007 12:50 PM

thefreak said:

FearTheReaper said:
I have never killed a dog in a video game.

So, never played Wolfenstein 3D or Resident Evil?

-TM

They were zombie dogs! Big difference.

sarahg

USA

November 2004

JUL 27, 2007 01:05 PM

this makes me a bad person, but, i hope he dies. i don't care how.. i just want one less animal abusing scum bag on this planet. fucking piece of shit excuse for a human being.

sarahg

USA

November 2004

JUL 27, 2007 01:27 PM

benhasglasses said:
if i was a billionaire i'd totally have people killed, or take part in bloodsports. what is there left to do? buy more houses, bone more woman? im only half kidding.

Hunt people all you want, because we're fucking rotten. These dogs didn't do SHIT to deserve this.

bean

STAFF

Los Angeles, CA

JUL 27, 2007 01:34 PM

benhasglasses said:
end of insane rant meant to cause people to get pissed.

Go the fuck away, troll.

Rafi

Santa Monica, CA

January 2003

JUL 27, 2007 01:37 PM

DevilsReject said:
Nothing is going to happen to him.

His money and his popularity will carry him through this. Bad people don't get punished. It's a part of our life, it's a part of our justice system.

Vick will use this to gain popularity, and pull people to his side, he will probably write a book about it. Kind of like drink milk because O.J. will kill you!

I am a total cynic when it comes to people getting what they deserve, bad people win every day. get used to it, the trend doesn't change.

I am just sad because dogs had to die.

I agree. The cynic in me says that people's idiotic worship of fame and celebrity will trump their affection for dogs. I hope I'm wrong.

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH

February 2007

JUL 27, 2007 01:49 PM

FearTheReaper said:

If he killed a person I would agree with you because we are so desensitized to murder as a society. We read about murder everyday, watch it on tv, see it in the movies. I kill many people on a weekly bases in video games. MANY.

I have never killed a dog in a video game.

He will have to find a jury of 12 people who do not own animals - and probably are allergic to them. (allergic people often hate animals - and they are weak) I don't think it will be possible to find a jury that will let him off. Possibly a hung jury - but you just don't fuck with people's animals.

I agree with you...almost

Murder isn't the only thing that society has desensitized itself to. The way people act anymore, it's fucking horrible.

There is no respect anymore. No one wants to turn the other cheek. Everyone has to fight for what they believe in, they can't accept that other people are alive and don't see things their way.

And what tops it all off in this society is that money talks more than actions. Money talks much louder than actions. Dick Cheney Shooting a hunting partner in the face, companies that are still in existence after breaking, many, many laws simply paid fines.

You are not responsible for your actions if you have the funds to pay your way out of the actions.

I hope you're right FTR, i like your point of view on a lot of things, i just, i guess have lost faith in humanity.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

sarahg

USA

November 2004

JUL 27, 2007 01:56 PM

DevilsReject said:

There is no respect anymore. No one wants to turn the other cheek. Everyone has to fight for what they believe in, they can't accept that other people are alive and don't see things their way.

this is very true. always looking for a struggle, always having to prove someone else is wrong and you (not YOU, but general populus you) are right.

decency is gone forever.

obee_one

Fowlerville, MI

December 2003

JUL 27, 2007 02:11 PM

a little fire.. but i just pulled out my handy dandy pocket version of the Constitution of the United States of America..

Amendment 5 says "... nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law;..".

Amendment 6 states "In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State..."

and from what i have read so far, a lot of us are wanting to throw out the Constitution, and lynch him.. if i were in his shoes, i would appeal all the way up the courts on the grounds that my right to a speedy, public trial, by an impartial jury was not protected.

thank god Bush has basicly thrown out the Constitution, God Save the King!! and the Dogs!!

good luck to all involved..

Adroitbeing

I'm lost

September 2003

JUL 27, 2007 02:13 PM

This piece of shit Vick is dead. The feds have announced their intent to file a superseding indictment next month, indicating that they could include charges of racketeering, dogfighting (not in the original indictment), and the "Travel Act" (prohibits interstate travel or use of an interstate facility in the aid of a racketeering or an unlawful business enterprise).

They fired their first shot over Vick's bow to see how he would react on the strength of the limited grand jury testimony that has been released. Vick boned up being the honest guy that he is and hired the best legal counsel that NFL money could buy and entered a plea of not guilty. The feds however do not want a long protracted legal battle that highlights their own shortcomings in the prosecution of this despicable crime. No, they intend to overwhelm Vick and his legal counsel with evidence and further charges that practically demands he cop a plea.

Unfortunately, Vick will likely avoid jail time. However, his plea bargain will force the NFL to find him in violation of its rules and his life will unwind slowly, painfully before his eyes. Perhaps not enough punishment, but somethingI am going to enjoy watching.

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