Jon Bon Jovi- You've Seen a Million Faces... And Been Mocked By Them All

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We have a deal with Bon Jovi... And because of that deal I'm not sure Jon Bon Jovi gets to complain about anything...

He was huge in the '80s, made a bunch of hits. The climate changed, he became a joke... Acted in a film here and there... Years go by, and now he somehow make tons of money on the road, selling out shows to people who peaked when he did... Not a bad life...

He's sorta this goof-ball relic who's still having a good time... People smile when you mention him and most admit enjoying "Wanted Dead or Alive" when it comes on the radio. I doubt he fully understands his "laughable" status and that's probably for the best.

Back to my opening line. We, as a people, made a deal with Bon Jovi. A gentleman's agreement, if you will. And this deal came about due to an indisputable theory:

Jon Bon Jovi should have to take more shit than us.

I'm not even sure why this is. Though I believe it 100%, to the core of my being. Not because he's rich... or handsome... or clearly a lucky guy that hit the jackpot... not even because it's funny to picture him getting robbed. Think about it. Right? It is.

"Hey man... hey man, c'mon, I'm Jon Bon Jovi... please man... don't take the watch... ahh, not the watch..."

Maybe all these reasons together play a part, maybe not. I don't know, I'm not a specialist. My point is, it's... just true. And you may not have known it before now, maybe you never thought about it, but now that you hear it I defy you to deny it. You know I'm right.

Evolution. Relativity. Big Bang. All concepts, theories, proven to varying degrees through research and experimentation... and one day, among them will sit the theory that Jon Bon Jovi should take more shit than the rest of the world. Car stolen? Property vandalized? Guy yells some shit at you out a car window? Suck it up, Jon. Let it slide.

He seems like a nice dude, and he gets to live and pop up on VH-1 now and then blissfully unaware of how most of the world sees him... That's the deal. Keep your head down, play "Living on a Prayer," again, don't bother anyone and remember the rules... Abide by the theory.

He must've forgot.

Jon Bon Jovi wants the owner of the Mijovi energy drink to change its name, arguing it is too similar to his famous moniker.

But Marcos Carrington says his coffee-based energy drink is named after his girlfriend, whose name is Jovita, not the 45-year-old rocker.
You stupid son of a bitch... You're going to ruin everything. What's the more ridiculous assumption here, that the word "Mijovi" in any way reminds one of Jon Bon Jovi or that, in the year 2007, Jon Bon Jovi thinks the quickest way to make a name for yourself is to hook your wagon to the blazing star that is Jon. Bon. Jovi. I mentioned the year, right?

In a Jan. 22 letter, Los Angeles lawyer Peter Laird, representing Bon Jovi, objected to the word "Mijovi" as well as other words "itsmijovi" and "itsmilife" that appear in the company's marketing materials and on the can. Rather than use Carrington's spelling, the letter used the phrases, "It's My Jovi" and "It's My Life."

"As you should be aware, one of Bon Jovi's most popular songs is entitled `It's My Life,'" the letter states. "We hereby demand that you immediately cease and desist all further use of the name `Mijovi' and `It's My Life.'"

Carrington said the words "itsmijovi" and "itsmilife" are meant to mean "it's my jovial life." The full phrase on the can is "itsmienergy.itsmijovi.itsmilife."

"It is just unfair," Carrington, 37, told the Asbury Park Press for Thursday's newspapers. "It is unfair because Mijovi has nothing to do with Bon Jovi."
Not even the point, Marcos. Not even the fucking point. Under the prior agreement, you probably could've gotten away with calling it "JBJ's Mullet-juice," if you so desired... He shouldn't have been able to bat an eye... But the fact that he's targeting you, coming after you... For doing nothing!

Inexcusable. And now the deal has been broken.

God help you, Jon... This could get ugly.


TheCoolerKing is a proud native of the great state of NJ and feels some regret over this piece... but a deal's a deal.

web address: http://suicidegirls.com/news/celeb/21950/Jon-Bon-Jovi--Youve-Seen-a-Million-Faces...-And-Been-Mocked-By-Them-All/