• rumor
  • SUNDAY NOVEMBER 5 2006 3:00 PM

The Scarlett Letter: Mystery Sex Tape Stirs Controversy

Submitted by Alyk

Edited by Alyk

Tags: Lindsay Lohan, Sex Tape, Scenes From a Car

A good old-fashioned rumor circulated throughout the internet world for the past few weeks. A website called scenesfromacar.com offered for sale an audio tape a sex act performed by someone they refer to as “a regular in Us Weekly, high seven figure salary per film.“ The description of the scene got bloggers everywhere guessing which star could have uttered such brilliant dialog as, “Yeah, cum.”

It all started when I was walking near the sound tent and my buddy waived me over, smiling and chuckling to himself. He handed me a pair of headphones and informed me that (the actresses) mic was still on … she gets into a vehicle and shares some sweet talk with a guy. I thought she had a boyfriend, but I don’t recognize this guy’s voice … There is some rustling, then the vehicle door opens … She reclines the seat and gets back in. Skip ahead, here is some more sweet talk, then some more rustling, then they start kissing and so forth … THEN, for twelve minutes and forty seven seconds, she gives him the sexiest blow job I have ever heard capped off by the words “Yeah, cum”.


Lucky listeners guessed Lindsay Lohan must be the smoky-voiced star. After the Lohan rumor made the rounds, scenesfromacar.com wanted to make it clear Lohan was not the broad on the tape. They issued a clue for those playing along.

Well, that almost makes it too easy for us. It doesn’t exactly take a Nathaniel Hawthorne expert to figure this one out.

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_Elichrusos

_Elichrusos

Australia
November 2004

NOV 05, 2006 08:00 PM

_DictionaryGirl_ said:

AndrewB said:
Am I missing something or does that website not mention the word "Scarlett" at all? It is only in the title of the news story here on SG.



Have you read the book The Scarlet Letter? Because that's what's implied by what the did post:



Shhhhhhhhhhhh!

So, who's the most recently famous adulteress?

toothpickmoe

toothpickmoe

Los Angeles, CA
May 2004

NOV 05, 2006 09:01 PM

*pounds head against ground*

PRockGirlScout

PRockGirlScout

Portland, OR
October 2005

NOV 05, 2006 09:11 PM

Sick said:

What guy is going to take almost thirteen minutes to cum if Scarlett Johanssen is giving him a blowjob? I mean, really. It's just not plausible.




First of all, much of it depends on the guy. Some guys qumb in seconds, some in minutes, some in 15 minutes. Secondly, IMO a really good blowjob isn't just about the payoff, it's about the experience. The best compliments I've gotten from glassy eyed victims have been from fellatio where I intentionally drew things out.

Oh and please God let this be Scarlett. I'm sexually wired more auditory anyway. Add in Scarlett and gaaaah love

toothpickmoe

toothpickmoe

Los Angeles, CA
May 2004

NOV 05, 2006 09:20 PM

PRockGirlScout said:

Sick said:

What guy is going to take almost thirteen minutes to cum if Scarlett Johanssen is giving him a blowjob? I mean, really. It's just not plausible.




First of all, much of it depends on the guy. Some guys qumb in seconds, some in minutes, some in 15 minutes. Secondly, IMO a really good blowjob isn't just about the payoff, it's about the experience. The best compliments I've gotten from glassy eyed victims have been from fellatio where I intentionally drew things out.

Oh and please God let this be Scarlett. I'm sexually wired more auditory anyway. Add in Scarlett and gaaaah love



I just qumbed.

PRockGirlScout

PRockGirlScout

Portland, OR
October 2005

NOV 05, 2006 09:36 PM

toothpickmoe said:

PRockGirlScout said:

Sick said:

What guy is going to take almost thirteen minutes to cum if Scarlett Johanssen is giving him a blowjob? I mean, really. It's just not plausible.




First of all, much of it depends on the guy. Some guys qumb in seconds, some in minutes, some in 15 minutes. Secondly, IMO a really good blowjob isn't just about the payoff, it's about the experience. The best compliments I've gotten from glassy eyed victims have been from fellatio where I intentionally drew things out.

Oh and please God let this be Scarlett. I'm sexually wired more auditory anyway. Add in Scarlett and gaaaah love



I just qumbed.



qame. duh.tongue

otaku

otaku

USA
January 2004

NOV 05, 2006 09:48 PM

Any hopes of it being SJ are probably more wishful thinking than anything else. JS perhaps, or PH, or even someone who's Legally Blonde? (I'm guessing it ain't HM).
Or this could just be pure bullshit. skull

Not2Bright

Not2Bright

Sumter, SC
July 2006

NOV 05, 2006 10:01 PM

PRockGirlScout said:

Sick said:

What guy is going to take almost thirteen minutes to cum if Scarlett Johanssen is giving him a blowjob? I mean, really. It's just not plausible.




First of all, much of it depends on the guy. Some guys qumb in seconds, some in minutes, some in 15 minutes. Secondly, IMO a really good blowjob isn't just about the payoff, it's about the experience. The best compliments I've gotten from glassy eyed victims have been from fellatio where I intentionally drew things out.

Oh and please God let this be Scarlett. I'm sexually wired more auditory anyway. Add in Scarlett and gaaaah love



Um, I'll be back, I gotta find a sock.

darkcharge

darkcharge

Portland, OR
June 2006

NOV 06, 2006 12:53 AM

A is for Angelina

Markus001

Markus001

United Kingdom
November 2004

NOV 06, 2006 01:25 AM

SucksAtPhotoshop said:

PRockGirlScout said:

Sick said:

What guy is going to take almost thirteen minutes to cum if Scarlett Johanssen is giving him a blowjob? I mean, really. It's just not plausible.




First of all, much of it depends on the guy. Some guys qumb in seconds, some in minutes, some in 15 minutes. Secondly, IMO a really good blowjob isn't just about the payoff, it's about the experience. The best compliments I've gotten from glassy eyed victims have been from fellatio where I intentionally drew things out.

Oh and please God let this be Scarlett. I'm sexually wired more auditory anyway. Add in Scarlett and gaaaah love



Um, I'll be back, I gotta find a sock.



I am right there with ya buddy.

_DictionaryGirl_

_DictionaryGirl_

NEWSWIRE

San Diego, CA

NOV 06, 2006 01:33 AM

Anyone know if Bea Arthur has a boyfriend right now? She's pretty husky-voiced, as I recall. shocked

toothpickmoe

toothpickmoe

Los Angeles, CA
May 2004

NOV 06, 2006 02:03 AM

_DictionaryGirl_ said:
Anyone know if Bea Arthur has a boyfriend right now? She's pretty husky-voiced, as I recall. shocked



You've been watching too many Comedy Central Roasts.

darkcharge

darkcharge

Portland, OR
June 2006

NOV 06, 2006 03:40 AM

_DictionaryGirl_ said:
Anyone know if Bea Arthur has a boyfriend right now? She's pretty husky-voiced, as I recall. shocked


Maybe that was the receiving end smile

Crivelli

Crivelli

United Kingdom
January 2005

NOV 06, 2006 04:07 AM



It's a 3 2 1 clue.

The "clue" said 'For those that wanted a hint (infer what you want from this): A', and that's 12 words + the letter 'A' so are you looking for a person who's name has 13 letters and begins with an A? -

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Angelina Jolie



"For those that wanted a hint...." is this someone without a clue? -

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
This doesn't really help as there are far too many celebrities without the sense that God gave a billy goat but Paris Hilton is particularly dumb.



"(infer what you want from this)"

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Ok, I've run out of steam on this and have better things to do.



sick

sick

Minneapolis, MN
June 2003

NOV 06, 2006 05:10 AM

PRockGirlScout said:

Sick said:

What guy is going to take almost thirteen minutes to cum if Scarlett Johanssen is giving him a blowjob? I mean, really. It's just not plausible.




First of all, much of it depends on the guy. Some guys qumb in seconds, some in minutes, some in 15 minutes. Secondly, IMO a really good blowjob isn't just about the payoff, it's about the experience. The best compliments I've gotten from glassy eyed victims have been from fellatio where I intentionally drew things out.

Oh and please God let this be Scarlett. I'm sexually wired more auditory anyway. Add in Scarlett and gaaaah love



I never thought so many people would take this comment for anything other than what it was: tongue-in-cheek.

sick

sick

Minneapolis, MN
June 2003

NOV 06, 2006 05:49 AM

PRockGirlScout said:
[Serious response telling me why I'm wrong and my joke was ineffective, and didn't make people say, "ha ha ha!" as I intended]



Let my try again, now that I've had my Lucky Charms. What I should have said was, "If it were me getting a blowjob from Scarlett Johannson, I certainly wouldn't last thirteen minutes. Because she's just that hot. But since I clearly have an abnormal of sexual stamina, I must project my sexual inadequacy onto everyone else in order to make myself feel better. Therefore, no man could last nearly thirteen minutes, and this tape must be a hoax."

wink


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