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  • FRIDAY AUGUST 13 2004 12:00 PM

Best friend gone bad

To make a long story short, the guy I've liked for almost five years and I kissed. The thing is, he has a girlfriend, but we both agreed not to tell her because he "loves her" and they are going to "get married." The thing is, she is the most horrible woman on the face of the earth, and myself as well as other friends are concerned about how much she has changed him. I miss the funny, care-free guy. I'm hating the new guy who is always depressed when she is around. Is there any way I can save him from her, or is he doomed to spend the rest of his life with this depressing, annoying and hopelessly needy chick?

 
Comments
Al

Al

SUICIDEGIRL

Christmas Island

AUG 13, 2004 01:44 PM

Have you talked to him about how much she sucks and how crappy he's become? I mean, not in those words, but it's something I'd try. Get your friends together and have an intervention. How long have they been together? It can be really hard to get out of a relationship that's lasted a long time. You have to show him the light, man.

Felidae

Felidae

SUICIDEGIRL

United Kingdom

AUG 13, 2004 05:14 PM

Occasionally we have to deal with the fact that someone we love (platatonic or otherwise) has changed. Everyone changes, most notably as a result of outside influence through those around them. Ever introduced someone you knew to a band, only for them to utterly fall in love with said band? It's like that, only more pronounced. This effect only becomes heightened when introduced by a loved one. Naturally we all want to impress the ones we love, and equally we spend inordinate amounts of time with them, so, maybe this guy has simply changed during his time with this girl due to her influence, and maybe he doesn't see it as all bad. Look at it from his perspective.

Lolita

Lolita

SUICIDEGIRL

Oregon, USA

AUG 13, 2004 05:25 PM

as true as your cliams might be, you only have the power to tell him how you feel and not tell him what you think he should do.....poeple dont make decisions based on friends (who they have kissed~*the advice you give will seem biased) he will most likely get out of the relationship cuz it wont stop sucking. and if he has kissed you that seems to me that he has already, though maybe only subconsciencely, started to end it. dont worry, I doubt if she really depresses him that much and he is already got his lips on other girls, that it will last long.
bottom line you dont have the power to end it, but you can be a good friend and tell him what you see, and that you wish him to be happy, then stick with the friendship through his hard times, like good friends do!
good luck!

Ayla

Ayla

Petaluma, CA
February 2004

AUG 13, 2004 11:07 PM

I'll keep it simple: sometimes, it's better if you just let people go and let them discover for themselves.

All you can do is hope for the best.

NicoleLee

NicoleLee

SUICIDEGIRL

USA

AUG 21, 2004 01:55 PM

if he loves her and wants to marry her-- then he wouldnt be lip-locking with you in the first place. espeically if he didnt want to tell her.

ix-nay.

Tawnya

Tawnya

SUICIDEGIRL

California, USA

AUG 21, 2004 03:47 PM

He'll figure it out for himself. It might even take years. If you but in, he will most likely just get mad at you for trashing his lady love. Sit back and let him do the leg work himself.

Ryan

Ryan

SUICIDEGIRL

Greenland

AUG 21, 2004 04:53 PM

Ayla said:
I'll keep it simple: sometimes, it's better if you just let people go and let them discover for themselves.

All you can do is hope for the best.



word to that.

Mnislahi

Mnislahi

SUICIDEGIRL

Florida, USA

AUG 22, 2004 04:35 AM

Talk to him.. try to open his eyes about her. She's not good news.

Nic

Nic

SUICIDEGIRL

United Kingdom

AUG 24, 2004 04:13 AM

If he kissed you he's probably not that fond of her after all. Tell him you think she's a huge bitch.

Mle

Mle

SUICIDEGIRL

New York, USA

AUG 24, 2004 04:49 PM

let it go, he will see eventually and you will just end up looking like you are trying to win him over. been there done that, it doesnt work. find a better guy with no girlie and makeout with him, or hell just makeout with me! wink