"honey you mean a lot to me and I know that you're right- i should stop drinking and casual sex doesn't help anything. however, i'm not ready to stop just yet. Please keep me in mind if you need a friend, but i can understand if you don't want to see me this way. do you think i can give you a call to see how you're doing when i've settled down? I'd like to see us eventually be close again one day."

Dear Doormat,

My nice advice: Politely express your feelings about the situation - that you feel you are being treated unfairly without warrant. Tell her you never would have had that silly casual sex if you had known the repercussions it would have had on your friendship. Tell her how much she means to you and ask what would make her feel more comfortable about the whole matter. There's not much else you can do - it's in her hands.

What I would do: Tell her she's being ridiculous and possessive. And don't wait for her to call you back.

I agree that you should tell her that you don't like her unsolicited judgments, but I believe you may have just fallen back into the pattern of your relationship--you two probably need to spend more time apart,

I think that you should avoid seeing her. It soulds like you feel bad about yourself when you are together and she is probably putting you down to ease her own feelings of loss or insecurity.

You said yourself that you believe you have been a doormat. Value yourself and let her go. You do not need a lover OR a friend who constantly criticises or judges you. Advice is fine- condescension is not.

she is doing that girl thing where she doesnt want you but doesnt want to lose the "rights" to you. she wants you to be sitting at home thinking about her, and she wants to still be able to control you, but doesnt want you to have any say. i garentee that is you made any comment on her behavior she'd give you the "you're not my boyfriend" blow off. so tell her she's not your girlfriend and that she isnt being a very good friend to you. back off let her get over the break up and then maybe she can handle being friends with you without trying to walk all over you.

She's stupid and you're an idiot for going out with her in the first place. Face it; you're both losers. Next time be more careful about your pick for Pussy of the Month.

I think as hard as it can be to stop hanging out with someone who has been such an integral part of your life, you need to realize that right now this relationship is toxic. Backing away from it now and not seeing the person for a while doesn't mean you will never be friends again, but it sounds like you just can't be friends right now. You both need time to heal up old wounds, and when you are ready you will more than likely be able to be friends again, but it is nearly impossible to flow seamlessly from being lovers to friends without a major break in old habits, such as hanging out. Try rebuilding some old friendships that may have slipped through the cracks during your romance, and get out in different social settings, and you'll feel a lot better.

She sounds like she's sad that the relationship has gone up the Swanney and she's trying to compensate for it by being critical.
I think that staying away from her for the time being and letting her cool off would probably be the best course of action, and let her work out her bitterness on her own.

if she's always acted that way as you say then i say: dump her for good. at least until she can act like an adult. you guys are no longer in a relationship but she can't seem to give up that control factor over your life. fuck that. no one needs to be treated like that. no matter how good or long the firendship had been going on.

if you don't treat yourself with respect no one else will. stand up straight and tell that girl to get off your nuts unless she's planning on sucking them cause she has no right to tell you what to do.

and i KNOW that you don't want to lose her friendship or that closeness you once shared but damn... is it really worth it if all she ever does is treat you like shit?