I've been dating this incredible guy for almost a year now, and the relationship is genuinely good. It's not perfect, but nothing ever is. Our personalities mesh well together, we take care of each other, the sex is incredible, and he's there when i need him. He just makes me happy. He loves me more than he's ever loved anyone else before, and I know that. The problem is that I'm just not sure I'm in the same boat.

A long time ago (I'm talking years and years) I dated a man who I can't seem to get over. I like to think that I've moved on. It's been ages and I've dated many other people, and I've been in love again. But things always seem to go back to him. I think I set the standard for my relationships to what our relationship was, and it seems like everybody keeps falling short of that goal. Things were not perfect with him--far from it, and to be quite honest I think that we've changed so much in the period of time that we've dated that we could probably never really be together again. I imagine it would be quite a train wreck.

How do I know if I'm just suffering from 'the grass is always greener on the other side' syndrome? I don't want to settle, but I don't want to spend my life chasing impossible ideals, either. Where is the line between realistic desires and wants and completely unrealistic dreams? And how do I try and balance those with my current relationship?

I just feel lost, and confused, and I don't want to hurt this incredible man because I can't get my head straight.