So I had this weird fucking dream just now, and when I woke up, I figured i'd share it with you all :-P
I went, for some reason, to see this guy Dave that I used to hang out with a bit (Yeah, that's right, YOU. Don't take this in a weird way, m'kay? Dreams are like that. Ahem.)
Anyway, I show up and he's not there, but the door's unlocked. I then seemed to remember him telling me something about going on a short vacation. Me being the nosy beotch I am, I go inside, and I find a pack of cigarettes that're really expensive, and, of course, I swipe one. mmm...
I don't quite know how, but the next thing I remember, I'm stripping my clothes off in the middle of his living room, when all of a sudden I hear an urgent knock at the door. Obviously I'm a little freaked because I'm half naked in the middle of someone else's living room that I don't have permission to be in, so I go over and hold the door shut and say "whaaaaaat?!" in a panicky voice through the door. It's Dave, of course :-P
He says "I knew it was you, I've been following you around for weeks...I didn't really go on vacation because I knew you'd come here". I, as per my usual reaction, tell him he's full of shit. He repeats his original statement in a slightly modified form, and this goes on for a while. Eventually I'm half-convinced that for some reason, Dave's been following me around, and I ask him to let me get dressed before he comes in.
I could actually FEEL myself blushing at that point. Odd. Heh.
Anyway, I'm barely starting to get dressed when he walks in anyway.
Detailed hot and dirty things followed. Yes, man, you were good. Anyway, in the midst of the aforementioned hot-and-dirty-things, I hear another fucking knock at the door. I'm a little peeved about it, but go and see who it is. Guess who? It's my fuckin' boyfriend. I spend a moment wondering how he knew where I was, before I get back to the moment and notice that he doesn't seem to be bothered at all by my buck-nakedness or obvious healthy flush :-P
I turn back around, and am not entirely pleased to find that nekkid Dave has turned into this chick I slept with a couple of years ago. Yeah. I did forget her name. Let's move on...
I just ran into her irl the other day for the first time since our escapade, so it's understandable that she popped up... I'd had this thing with her when she was very, very pregnant, with a completely shaved head... shaved everything for that matter, and it involved punk rock boys and a lot of fun. But I digress.
Anyway, this chick (decidedly UN-pregnant, AND fully clothed) was who was now standing in the living room of the house. He smiled at her and then walked right in to hang out. She invited me out for one of them expensive cigarettes, and I walked out onto the porch, still buck-fucking-naked.
I was a little uncomfortable because college kids kept walking by and gawking at me, and then she told me to hide behind a bush because her dad was about to walk up the footpath. She told me he wouldn't get mad at me for being naked, but that he'd be rude. We stayed out there for a bit, then I noticed a huuuuuuge crowd of people trying to get into the house next door. A party of some sort, apparently. People were dressed up... I saw a Captain Condom, one of those Pirate Ghosts from Scooby Doo, and a bunch of other shit. Eventually it became apparent that they couldn't get in, so the chick lets them in through a secret passage in the house WE were at while I wait outside, not wondering why I can't see a visible passage from that house to the party house.... So all these people are tramping by my naked self into the house and over to the house next door. Guess who was going to the party?
Ashes and Chloe. Fucking weird.
Anyway, the people stop coming, the door shuts, and I'm out there alone as the sun goes down. I notice that people can go right into the house next door after a while, and the strangest costumes keep popping up... a bunch of raver kids dressed as farmers, leading real livestock on leads. A cow, a sheep, a large hunting dog, you get the idea. I decided it would be funny to yell "SooooooEEEE!" when the farmer raver kid with the pig on a leash passed by, so I did. Then I notice it's completely dark, and a little creepy outside. There's a field right next to the house, and I notice two big black crows getting it on in the middle of it (what the HELL is wrong with me?). I go over and run after them to get them away from the house, and they fly away from each other, not turning into two sorely dissapointed crows as one woould expect, but several small crows. I think I counted five. weird. Running after morphing crows naked. I'm so smooth.
Anyway, I finally realize it's been a while since I've seen the chick, so I walk back into the living room, grab a shirt, and look up. My boyfriend and the chick are sitting on the couch with their arms around each other, beckoning me to come sit with them. I have an odd twinge of jealousy, then hormones, I start to walk towards them, and then I wake up.
Fuckin' analyze this.
---------Looked at this, chortled, and decided to take it down. Aaaanyway...
I went, for some reason, to see this guy Dave that I used to hang out with a bit (Yeah, that's right, YOU. Don't take this in a weird way, m'kay? Dreams are like that. Ahem.)
Anyway, I show up and he's not there, but the door's unlocked. I then seemed to remember him telling me something about going on a short vacation. Me being the nosy beotch I am, I go inside, and I find a pack of cigarettes that're really expensive, and, of course, I swipe one. mmm...
I don't quite know how, but the next thing I remember, I'm stripping my clothes off in the middle of his living room, when all of a sudden I hear an urgent knock at the door. Obviously I'm a little freaked because I'm half naked in the middle of someone else's living room that I don't have permission to be in, so I go over and hold the door shut and say "whaaaaaat?!" in a panicky voice through the door. It's Dave, of course :-P
He says "I knew it was you, I've been following you around for weeks...I didn't really go on vacation because I knew you'd come here". I, as per my usual reaction, tell him he's full of shit. He repeats his original statement in a slightly modified form, and this goes on for a while. Eventually I'm half-convinced that for some reason, Dave's been following me around, and I ask him to let me get dressed before he comes in.
I could actually FEEL myself blushing at that point. Odd. Heh.
Anyway, I'm barely starting to get dressed when he walks in anyway.
Detailed hot and dirty things followed. Yes, man, you were good. Anyway, in the midst of the aforementioned hot-and-dirty-things, I hear another fucking knock at the door. I'm a little peeved about it, but go and see who it is. Guess who? It's my fuckin' boyfriend. I spend a moment wondering how he knew where I was, before I get back to the moment and notice that he doesn't seem to be bothered at all by my buck-nakedness or obvious healthy flush :-P
I turn back around, and am not entirely pleased to find that nekkid Dave has turned into this chick I slept with a couple of years ago. Yeah. I did forget her name. Let's move on...
I just ran into her irl the other day for the first time since our escapade, so it's understandable that she popped up... I'd had this thing with her when she was very, very pregnant, with a completely shaved head... shaved everything for that matter, and it involved punk rock boys and a lot of fun. But I digress.
Anyway, this chick (decidedly UN-pregnant, AND fully clothed) was who was now standing in the living room of the house. He smiled at her and then walked right in to hang out. She invited me out for one of them expensive cigarettes, and I walked out onto the porch, still buck-fucking-naked.
I was a little uncomfortable because college kids kept walking by and gawking at me, and then she told me to hide behind a bush because her dad was about to walk up the footpath. She told me he wouldn't get mad at me for being naked, but that he'd be rude. We stayed out there for a bit, then I noticed a huuuuuuge crowd of people trying to get into the house next door. A party of some sort, apparently. People were dressed up... I saw a Captain Condom, one of those Pirate Ghosts from Scooby Doo, and a bunch of other shit. Eventually it became apparent that they couldn't get in, so the chick lets them in through a secret passage in the house WE were at while I wait outside, not wondering why I can't see a visible passage from that house to the party house.... So all these people are tramping by my naked self into the house and over to the house next door. Guess who was going to the party?
Ashes and Chloe. Fucking weird.
Anyway, the people stop coming, the door shuts, and I'm out there alone as the sun goes down. I notice that people can go right into the house next door after a while, and the strangest costumes keep popping up... a bunch of raver kids dressed as farmers, leading real livestock on leads. A cow, a sheep, a large hunting dog, you get the idea. I decided it would be funny to yell "SooooooEEEE!" when the farmer raver kid with the pig on a leash passed by, so I did. Then I notice it's completely dark, and a little creepy outside. There's a field right next to the house, and I notice two big black crows getting it on in the middle of it (what the HELL is wrong with me?). I go over and run after them to get them away from the house, and they fly away from each other, not turning into two sorely dissapointed crows as one woould expect, but several small crows. I think I counted five. weird. Running after morphing crows naked. I'm so smooth.
Anyway, I finally realize it's been a while since I've seen the chick, so I walk back into the living room, grab a shirt, and look up. My boyfriend and the chick are sitting on the couch with their arms around each other, beckoning me to come sit with them. I have an odd twinge of jealousy, then hormones, I start to walk towards them, and then I wake up.
Fuckin' analyze this.
---------Looked at this, chortled, and decided to take it down. Aaaanyway...
So I'm babysitting. Means I missed the little get together at joyrider's, and that makes me a saaaad panda. *sigh*...
Anyway, it's nice. he's a very very chill kid, just about ready to start walking.... he's like a crawling wind up toy, it's really odd. I just got him to bed, and I'm staring at his angelic little face by the light of my monitor. awww. makes me almost *like* mammals...
Anyway, it's nice. he's a very very chill kid, just about ready to start walking.... he's like a crawling wind up toy, it's really odd. I just got him to bed, and I'm staring at his angelic little face by the light of my monitor. awww. makes me almost *like* mammals...
new tattoo today, guys. Done at Rose City tattoo, by some guy whose name sounded like "George".... that picture's absolutely abysmal quality, but you get the idea. there's a lot more detail in it, though, and I'll take a better photo soon.
Can you tell what it is?
Can you tell what it is?
It's my boyfriend's 23rd birthday today.
We went to see his grandparents, which always makes me vaguely uneasy. His grandmother's very nice to me, but she just seems to *ooze* vague religious themed dissaproval from every pore. Asriel's grandfather was just sent an old photo album by his sister, the thing must've been at least a hundred years old, filled with old sepia-toned photos of people he mostly didn't know....he showed it to us, pointed out the pictures of his father and brother working a horse drawn plow... pointed out the pictures of his grandparents and mother, showed us a picture of his two younger brothers and told us how they were both currently dying of cancer. His voice shook. I wish I could've hugged him.
Old pictures are amazing things, I could've looked at that album for hours, imagining the history behind every photograph.
His grandparents are getting very old... they try so hard to keep it all together, but every time I see them, I know the effort that's put into making themselves and the house presentable for us, and I remember when they were both ill and in the hospital, much worse off than they should have been because they didn't ask for help. I remember his granddad collapsed and stuttering and trying to keep his dignity while they put a diaper on him, and I remember all of us being shocked by the news that his grandmother had had a hysterectomy and a mastectomy in the past, and that she'd been a ward of the state way back when, tossed from foster home to foster home and being hurt. Both said to me in the hospital, "I lost my daughter, I miss her"....but put on their brick wall faces once their medications wore off.
So I was thinking about all that, and Asriel's very sad because birthdays make him think of his mother... that daughter they lost. She died a few years ago, when he was still in his teenage "fuck off, mom, you're not cool" stage, and he feels unbelievably guilty for not being closer to her at the end.
Birthdays are 'supposed' to be a celebration of life and joy and growing wisdom and all that jazz,
but from what I know, and what I see, they're more of an excuse to yearn, to mourn, to feel guilty for what you haven't done before now, to feel hopeless about what you can accomplish in whatever amount of time you've got left...
We went to see his grandparents, which always makes me vaguely uneasy. His grandmother's very nice to me, but she just seems to *ooze* vague religious themed dissaproval from every pore. Asriel's grandfather was just sent an old photo album by his sister, the thing must've been at least a hundred years old, filled with old sepia-toned photos of people he mostly didn't know....he showed it to us, pointed out the pictures of his father and brother working a horse drawn plow... pointed out the pictures of his grandparents and mother, showed us a picture of his two younger brothers and told us how they were both currently dying of cancer. His voice shook. I wish I could've hugged him.
Old pictures are amazing things, I could've looked at that album for hours, imagining the history behind every photograph.
His grandparents are getting very old... they try so hard to keep it all together, but every time I see them, I know the effort that's put into making themselves and the house presentable for us, and I remember when they were both ill and in the hospital, much worse off than they should have been because they didn't ask for help. I remember his granddad collapsed and stuttering and trying to keep his dignity while they put a diaper on him, and I remember all of us being shocked by the news that his grandmother had had a hysterectomy and a mastectomy in the past, and that she'd been a ward of the state way back when, tossed from foster home to foster home and being hurt. Both said to me in the hospital, "I lost my daughter, I miss her"....but put on their brick wall faces once their medications wore off.
So I was thinking about all that, and Asriel's very sad because birthdays make him think of his mother... that daughter they lost. She died a few years ago, when he was still in his teenage "fuck off, mom, you're not cool" stage, and he feels unbelievably guilty for not being closer to her at the end.
Birthdays are 'supposed' to be a celebration of life and joy and growing wisdom and all that jazz,
but from what I know, and what I see, they're more of an excuse to yearn, to mourn, to feel guilty for what you haven't done before now, to feel hopeless about what you can accomplish in whatever amount of time you've got left...
got to give the public what they want.
here, hastily created for your viewing pleasure/horror...
a picture of my hair.
here, hastily created for your viewing pleasure/horror...
a picture of my hair.
Your claw gashes Love!
Love is DEAD!!
You receive 0 experience points.
You hear Love's death cry.
mmm.
by the way, the chosen colors were fuschia and blue.
Love is DEAD!!
You receive 0 experience points.
You hear Love's death cry.
mmm.
by the way, the chosen colors were fuschia and blue.
it's hard to update one's journal every day when there's nothing to write ABOUT, dammit.
I really need a job. If anyone's got any Portland-area leads they could pass on, I'd be really grateful.
Psyche's doing well. she's eating and filling out again.
My hair turns colors tomorrow. we'll see what color it ends up being. wanna place bets?
I really need a job. If anyone's got any Portland-area leads they could pass on, I'd be really grateful.
Psyche's doing well. she's eating and filling out again.
My hair turns colors tomorrow. we'll see what color it ends up being. wanna place bets?
