if you are reading this, you can read.

if you are reading this and are not human, I'd love to meet you.

....

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here

I never seek validation from girls, cause I know girls can't handle it.
I'd rather reach as high as I can, and find a place in my mind where nobody can follow.

this is my church, validation is not required.



Shane Yost @ gravity games in Perth.

ni, I am not making this up.



I love you, too.

perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.



there was a girl on this site with a huuuuuuge list of movies.. I knew most of them but wanted to find her again so I could get my own list in order. but alas, I have lost her blog in the ocean and you can't search blogs can you... bugger.

SG Interviews Liam Lynch???? this guy is one of my favorite artists and even answered one of my stupid questions on his show... I haven't read the interview yet but do go check out his podcast at his site liamlynch.net. episode 12 or 13 is good

my girlfriend is in Germany, I haven't seen her in 6 months and I just realised something strange. I couldn't figure it out until recently, a strange thing has happened... I smell like myself.

not to say I never strayed from my original scent, but I usually smelled of myself plus one.
myself plus Kaori, myself plus Chantal or Nathalie... and so on. but at the moment, I smell like myself.. and I haven't smelt like this since I was 17 perhaps.. in between the communal jostling smell of co-ed highschool and my first girlfriend.

I only noticed because I am reading perfume... if I wasn't reading that in this moment, I might never figured out why I felt so strange these last few months.

I've been thinking a lot about Suicide Girls, for better or worse.

When any of you girls contact me, I cannot bring myself to look at your sets... I read your blogs with more interest perhaps, but this hardwired extension of vanity between "friends" persists (something you apparently have overcome by being here in the first place).

Suicide.

Such a strong word. Even the name is a forgiven meme for any ensuing images of hedonism. More perhaps, a final fling for the self propelled terminal existence, be it decided by circumstance or understanding regardless. This might be true of many girls here, however, there are those that still have hope in their eyes and could be here merely because this is what is working right now. Working, as in, how the straight cut dresses of post WWII worked when the returned service men felt less comfortable with the curves of the traditional female (their mothers?) after being so long in the trenches with a male population.

My feelings tell me we returned from the trenches of feminism and, more constructively, the heterosexual-female revolution, and what is working right now is disdain towards males and faux-lesbian displays. Hard to get?, perhaps, but this is apparently what gets guys excited. Despite the fact what might good for the average male imagination might not translate well into actual human experience and interaction (keep it real sisters).

Given that I am only human, and subject to circumstance of my own, am I simply a man and cannot perceive alternatives past my own instincts? Or am I onto something?

Your all beautiful.

peace,

- O