my mom died a year ago at around 10 or 11 pm, april 15th.
i'm not doing well with this.
i vomited last night (i never do that) for absolutely no discernable reason. i wonder if i'm holding my emotions in too much.
my anxiety is at a higher level than usual... i can't breathe well, and i'm shaking a lot. i still feel pukey...
maybe if i just had a good cry i'd feel better? but i've spent so much time shoving that grief back down because no one around me wants me all weepy all the time.
i don't know what to do with my life anymore.
why couldn't i keep her alive?
~soma~
i'm not doing well with this.
i vomited last night (i never do that) for absolutely no discernable reason. i wonder if i'm holding my emotions in too much.
my anxiety is at a higher level than usual... i can't breathe well, and i'm shaking a lot. i still feel pukey...
maybe if i just had a good cry i'd feel better? but i've spent so much time shoving that grief back down because no one around me wants me all weepy all the time.
i don't know what to do with my life anymore.
why couldn't i keep her alive?
~soma~