I've been felling withdrawn and cutoff from the world of late. I'm just sinking deeper and deeper into myself. All introspective and selfdepracating. I have no real friends no one I can hang out with. No buddy who's going to get me stoned and drunk and drag me to a titty bar on my birthday. Fuck no one to even wish me a happy birthday except for my girlfriend and her mother. No one to play Rock Band with or any video games for that matter.

I miss having friends. It just seems the older I get the harder it is to make new ones and all the ones i had have all gone away. When you have really good friends it feels like they'll be around forever. You feel like your whole. Like your normal even.

But I'm not. Normal... or whole.

I have a gapping maw inside of me, stronger and deeper than the largest super massive black hole in the universe. Sucking in all light, all happiness, all hope. All that is left is the empty shell of a man who never even came close to living up to his potential.