wow christmas was sooo great, good food, good times with the family, and a nice ending with food shared with great friends, i usually see christmas as just another day but this year it was great.
on another note i want school to start back i feel like i'm accomplishing nothing with my life since break started.
on another note i want school to start back i feel like i'm accomplishing nothing with my life since break started.
well i got a crackberry and im completely obsessed
this one
o and the end of the semester is coming near which is fucking with me hard.
this one
o and the end of the semester is coming near which is fucking with me hard.
yesterday was my birthday but i was out and didn't have time to say so,
lately ive been pretty busy, im went back to school for a business degree and attempting to get my mess of a life back together, and it's all working out pretty well.
lately ive been pretty busy, im went back to school for a business degree and attempting to get my mess of a life back together, and it's all working out pretty well.
eyyy, haven't been here for a while, funds were insufficient.
but im back
welcome back me
but im back
welcome back me
the restaurant i worked at went out of business today, sweet the only thing i had going for me. PEACE.
hello everyone! gradually getting happier.
i was supposed to go see killwhitneydead tonight but they fucking sold out before i got off work WTF. there not the greatest band but they put on a great show and there shows are always very violent =], plus i havent been to a show in months. ah well.
works going good, im getting to know all my coworkers pretty well, which is good it takes me a long time to get to know people.
i can't wait till the first of the year im gonna look for a second job, i love work atm because i have nothing better to do haha. hopefully i will find something not in the restaurant business.
i kinda wanna go back to college but have no car. =/
later
i was supposed to go see killwhitneydead tonight but they fucking sold out before i got off work WTF. there not the greatest band but they put on a great show and there shows are always very violent =], plus i havent been to a show in months. ah well.
works going good, im getting to know all my coworkers pretty well, which is good it takes me a long time to get to know people.
i can't wait till the first of the year im gonna look for a second job, i love work atm because i have nothing better to do haha. hopefully i will find something not in the restaurant business.
i kinda wanna go back to college but have no car. =/
later
ive been doing good, I have a new ipod, and im trying to enjoy life more, peace!
edit: ill tell more about what happened on christmas tomorrow, im fucking wiped
edit: ill tell more about what happened on christmas tomorrow, im fucking wiped
i've done a lot of thinking today, i have to much time on my hands to think, its getting to me, to much thinking will eventually drive me crazy, anyway to the point.
I really miss Wilmington, I miss my friends, I miss my life, I miss having something to do, but i've come to the conclusion, that more than anything, i miss drugs.
I feel like I'm only 18 years old, and I will never ever escape this lifestyle, I've seen friends die because of it, go to jail, get completely fucked, ruin there lives, and whatever else. Does this sound appealing to you, me either, but for some reason i can't figure out why I love it all so much. Its the only thing im educated about, its the only thing i feel REALLY comfortable talking to a group about, its the only thing I've dedicated the last 4 years of my life to and i feel like i want to change, but its the only thing i know. its not normal to be subject to all these feelings at 18, i mean when i look back and think about the past couple years, iv drugs at 16 years old? was i fucking crazy? no just depressed and angry and it was there...and maybe with a little crazy wrapped up somewhere in the middle.
I've been clean for 2 months, but I honestly haven't gone a day without thinking about heroin, how i feel when im on it, trying to feel like im on it. to no avail of course.
sry for the bad grammar and run-on sentences. i hate putting rants in my journal but i feel the need to sometimes, i have noone to talk to in this godforsaken town except for my fucking keyboard.
I really miss Wilmington, I miss my friends, I miss my life, I miss having something to do, but i've come to the conclusion, that more than anything, i miss drugs.
I feel like I'm only 18 years old, and I will never ever escape this lifestyle, I've seen friends die because of it, go to jail, get completely fucked, ruin there lives, and whatever else. Does this sound appealing to you, me either, but for some reason i can't figure out why I love it all so much. Its the only thing im educated about, its the only thing i feel REALLY comfortable talking to a group about, its the only thing I've dedicated the last 4 years of my life to and i feel like i want to change, but its the only thing i know. its not normal to be subject to all these feelings at 18, i mean when i look back and think about the past couple years, iv drugs at 16 years old? was i fucking crazy? no just depressed and angry and it was there...and maybe with a little crazy wrapped up somewhere in the middle.
I've been clean for 2 months, but I honestly haven't gone a day without thinking about heroin, how i feel when im on it, trying to feel like im on it. to no avail of course.
sry for the bad grammar and run-on sentences. i hate putting rants in my journal but i feel the need to sometimes, i have noone to talk to in this godforsaken town except for my fucking keyboard.
