i watched the sun sink into the pacific from the bo-fax road this evening and reflected on the lifetime, the genealogical trail that led me here and such, and i noticed a finger of fog had severed pt. reyes from the continent and it looked like an island floating in a cloud, and i realized that i also felt disconnected from exsistence by a fog, and my heart sank with the sun as a tear for lost love rolled to dry ground of tamalpais...i got pulled over by the highway patrol on the 580 and the chip told me straight up he should take me in on a felony and i wouldn't see a judge for 5 days but he decided to write me the misdemeanor ticket intead and i replied "what's wrong, the paperwork gettin to ya?" and he laughed, cuz he knew i was right, i am too much paperwork for a guy who spends all day in the hot sun patrolling the the most congested interchanges in america, my friend who just got out of santa rita did not aqppreciate my humor, he was very uncomfortable with the situation and felt i made it worse by talking back, but in the end you got to call when the cards are dealt up....i hate feeling sick in hot weather, sick just seems to go with the cold, rainy time better...i broke into a summer vacation house last night and had sex in a hot tub and got drunk on wine that had been stolen from the wine cellar, i got to stop runnning around with teenage girls from the halfway house....i sharpened every knife i own and cleaned every firearm this morning, i must have been subconciously anxious about something...i am in a bar right now that has been open since 1851, i am drunk and the ghosts of the past derelicts welcome my soul in a way that seems to let me know there is a place for me, the computer is 5 bucks an hour and the drunks don't ever notice me...i am going to play poker with an ex-c.i.a. operative, a record producer, a dread from blue mountain, jamaica and an 80 yr. old italian anarchist...we are all out of luck so it will be interesting to see who wins.....