Scipio, you fat idiot, why did you sell you position on the Dow Jones Industrial average yesterday when you knew that China was going to increase their money supply?
It was a day trade. We need the cash now.
Scipio, you fat idiot, why do you never make molten lava cupcakes for girls?
First, it is labor intensive. Second, if you do not get it pretty quick out of the oven, in my experience, it just does not work. Everyone loves devil's food with milk chocolate icing.
Scipio, you fat idiot, what were you saying about a Gentleman Bandit?
I could go two ways with this; Black Bart of Billy Minor. I will go with the latter. Once Black Bart was captured, he was never heard form again. Billy Minor was captured several times. He escaped every single time. He was born in Kentucky,but moved west to rob stage coaches. He was always very polite, and apologized for the delay. He never killed a man.
He went north to British Columbia to rob the Canadian Pacific Rail Road. Not a very popular institution at the time. The good people of Beautiful British Columbia cheered him on. Once the heard he was making his way through the cars with his revolver drawn, and the passengers started to take out money and jewelry, and Minor said "Thank you kindly, but I am not after your money. I am here for the rail road's money." He also learned how to use a telegraph, and know Morse code, so he could send trains where he wanted them to go. Always apologizing profusely to the operator of the telegraph relay he had taken over, of course.
Inevitably, he was caught. Ironically, he was taken to prison in a train, the sides of he track thronged with people waving ahd cheering. Inevitably, he escaped. He returned to the United States, and continued his career. He was never captured again. Robbing trains with a smile and elegance, polite to the last. Even in death, he escaped. His name was misspelled, and the headstone in the wrong place. Eventually, it was corrected.
Or was it?
Scipio, you fat idiot, that is a pretty good story. What kind of pants is your hot little number of a girlfriend who you completely do not deserve wearing right now?
Yoga pants. Yum. Goth, she looks good. I really need to attend to her right now.