"That's a sexy outfit you have on there."
"Hey, baby... Fucking bitch, I was talking to you."
"Hello, precious [reaches out to touch my hair]."
It's baffling how many times that I have people talk at me when I'm walking down the street. It's also unfortunate how many people don't understand that this is a huge problem that many women (and men, too) face constantly. I now live in a place where I often take public transit and walk to get around town. This means I'm exposed to many more people on a constant basis than I was when I drove myself everywhere.
On average, I have someone say something lewd and unsolicited to me about two to three times every morning on my way into work when I'm walking by myself. About once or twice a month, I experience someone getting extremely angry because I didn't respond to the "Hey, baby," that they mumbled under their breath as I walked by, as if it's my given name. It's typical for me to be harassed one of two times a week when going to lunch with a group of my four coworkers, one even being male. I've been cat-called while walking hand-in-hand with my boyfriend, albeit that is much more rare. Sometimes even security guards that are on the job harass me as I walk by.
Why am I talking about this? I really hope that I can bring some sort of awareness to this issue. Regardless of how much skin I show on the internet (or what I wear as I walk down the street), I feel utterly uncomfortable and unsafe when i get harassed. Not to mention that it happens even when I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt, because it has nothing to do with what I wear.
I'm quite tired of being told to get used to it because "men are just like that," or to "take it as a compliment." I occasionally go through days where I feel like I'm being a bitch, and that it's really just me. Then someone will come up and talk to me like I'm a real person, they will be genuine, and speak to me in a respectable manner. That's when I realize that I'm not to blame for being annoyed and fearful; for ignoring people that demand a response from me just because they said "Hi, baby."
I don't owe any random stranger anything. Not because I'm wearing red lipstick. Not because I'm wearing black lipstick. Not because my hair is purple. Not because it's hot outside, and I'm wearing shorts. Not because I have tattoos. Not because I am female.
My name isn't baby, and I definitely don't owe a response to it being thrown my way.