So....I definitely pushed the issue too much with the girl I was interested in. She's called things off which has me down a bit but it's not a surprise. I'm not sure when I'll feel like dating again but it'll probably be at least a week or two. Live and learn I guess.
Round (date?) #3 today. So we hung out at a farmer's market and then took a bit of a walk through the city. It didn't feel like 5 hours but it also didn't feel nearly long enough. She bought some fruit and veggies then we decided to get some nice wine, cheese and bread at the ferry building and it was all quite good. We're still taking things slow which is fine although I really want to kiss her quite badly. I was thinking today that I can't remember ever going more than 3 dates before sleeping with someone....I'm not complaining that it's going slow because I don't want to rush her into something that would just cause tension, I'm just really attracted to her physically and I equally enjoy her company. She told me the other day that she likes me and is even attracted to me which I actually found a bit surprising. I guess I feel a bit apprehensive about moving in to kiss her because of the whole "take it slow" thing...it's just going to get harder to resist. I guess I just have to feel confident that I'll know when the right moment is and that trusting my instincts is the right thing to do. I'm not sure when I'll see her next so the wait is going to be tough.
She also just got a new job and I had the idea of getting her something for her desk as a decoration. At first I didn't have a clue....I wanted to tie it in with something we've talked about and something she enjoys and yet make it also something she'd probably never buy for herself (one of my theories are presents is that often what makes the best presents are things you like but wouldn't buy for yourself). So I was thinking that she has a transformers t-shirt that she wears a lot and then I tied that in with her love of mix-tapes (I made her a mix tape, well cd for our first meeting although I forgot it in my jacket but I did give it to her the second time) so I bought her a reissue of the old Transformer Soundwave, the guy that transforms into a tape player. If nothing else every guy she knows will think it's cool. I didn't want to go romantic or mushy just yet. I've realized that I've been really inconsiderate when it comes to gifts and just general thoughtfulness in my past relationships and I'm trying to get better with that. I think it's a good idea and a nice novel gift...hopefully she'll actually use it to decorate her desk. It won't arrive for a week so I'll have to wait for the reaction.
She also just got a new job and I had the idea of getting her something for her desk as a decoration. At first I didn't have a clue....I wanted to tie it in with something we've talked about and something she enjoys and yet make it also something she'd probably never buy for herself (one of my theories are presents is that often what makes the best presents are things you like but wouldn't buy for yourself). So I was thinking that she has a transformers t-shirt that she wears a lot and then I tied that in with her love of mix-tapes (I made her a mix tape, well cd for our first meeting although I forgot it in my jacket but I did give it to her the second time) so I bought her a reissue of the old Transformer Soundwave, the guy that transforms into a tape player. If nothing else every guy she knows will think it's cool. I didn't want to go romantic or mushy just yet. I've realized that I've been really inconsiderate when it comes to gifts and just general thoughtfulness in my past relationships and I'm trying to get better with that. I think it's a good idea and a nice novel gift...hopefully she'll actually use it to decorate her desk. It won't arrive for a week so I'll have to wait for the reaction.
Ah dating. Such a bizarre, fun and fucked up endeavor we put ourselves through. I went out for the second time with an amazing woman today. I think it's pretty obvious that we get along quite well, I'm just not sure if she's feeling the physical attraction that I am. When we first started talking (online) she made it clear that she wasn't interested in dating anyone right now (well that was a month ago) and I'm not sure how much things have changed. We talk quite regularly with emails and im's and she knows I'm really interested in her but she wants to take things slow and as friends for now. We hung out for 12 hours today and from early on I realized just how much I have a huge crush on her. It'll be interesting to see how patient I can be and to see how (if at all) her feelings develop for me. Well...I'm going to go smile myself to sleep 
Meeting number 2 in a little under 10 hours....I'm so nervous and excited, it's been awhile since I've felt like this and I really like it!
Vegans. A classic subject for me. I'm not going to talk about the validity or lack thereof of veganism. I was driving home tonight when I noticed that the BMW SUV in front of me that had a license plate that said "Go Vegan" on it. You'll never see a license plate that says "Go Omnivore" (okay smarty pants I know it has too many letters). In SF it's often that you'll see pro-vegan bumper stickers. t-shirts, even graffiti.
I was trying to think of other groups that are as blatant about recruitment. The only 2 I could think of were born again christians and the military. I'm not a vegan, I'm not a christian and I'm not in the military but I really hope this doesn't come off as a bias against them...I'm really just trying to look at the connection that these groups have in "recruiting" new acolytes. With christians, they're recruiting people because they genuinely believe that a persons eternal soul is at stake....pretty serious stuff by any account. The military want to get people to do a job that many people either consider the ultimate in noble sacrifices or crazy. Many people talk about giving their lives for their beliefs but few people actually make that commitment. When it comes to vegans though I'm having trouble seeing why they're so passionate in proselytizing for new people. Are they really so concerned about my weight or health? I think we all deserve the best in health care and education but I'm a firm believer in letting people make their own choices and living with the consequences. Maybe they're just better, more caring people than I am. Is it an animal rights thing? I can see that a bit but why go after people's food. Why not more of a push towards the rights and well being of animals instead of the more circuitous route by going after people's diets? The impression I get though and maybe it's bay area thing and maybe it's because I've only been exposed to many vegans that tried to give the the hard sell and subsequent guilt trip. I often get the feeling (and maybe I'm wrong) that their belief that going vegan is a matter of superior judgment, morality and education and I'm not just buying that. I know I'm not alone in feeling this from the omnivore front. If I'm wrong in this I'd sure like someone to explain it to me. Again, I'm not trying to argue the merits of the diet or lifestyle but why so many feel the need to recruit more vegans.
I was trying to think of other groups that are as blatant about recruitment. The only 2 I could think of were born again christians and the military. I'm not a vegan, I'm not a christian and I'm not in the military but I really hope this doesn't come off as a bias against them...I'm really just trying to look at the connection that these groups have in "recruiting" new acolytes. With christians, they're recruiting people because they genuinely believe that a persons eternal soul is at stake....pretty serious stuff by any account. The military want to get people to do a job that many people either consider the ultimate in noble sacrifices or crazy. Many people talk about giving their lives for their beliefs but few people actually make that commitment. When it comes to vegans though I'm having trouble seeing why they're so passionate in proselytizing for new people. Are they really so concerned about my weight or health? I think we all deserve the best in health care and education but I'm a firm believer in letting people make their own choices and living with the consequences. Maybe they're just better, more caring people than I am. Is it an animal rights thing? I can see that a bit but why go after people's food. Why not more of a push towards the rights and well being of animals instead of the more circuitous route by going after people's diets? The impression I get though and maybe it's bay area thing and maybe it's because I've only been exposed to many vegans that tried to give the the hard sell and subsequent guilt trip. I often get the feeling (and maybe I'm wrong) that their belief that going vegan is a matter of superior judgment, morality and education and I'm not just buying that. I know I'm not alone in feeling this from the omnivore front. If I'm wrong in this I'd sure like someone to explain it to me. Again, I'm not trying to argue the merits of the diet or lifestyle but why so many feel the need to recruit more vegans.
So being single has been.....well, boring. I've never been the most social person on Earth especially with people I don't already know. We'd all love to be with someone that makes us feels good about ourselves, that stimulate our senses and excite us but I'm just lacking the energy to look. I'm hoping serendipity will help out but good things seldom fall into my lap.
I'm really feeling the need to move into SF. Alameda isn't far away and it's quietness can be nice but it's just so damn dull (much like me?). I can't even consider it though until I get more stabilized career-wise which I thought I was until a month ago...hopefully things will work out there. I guess the theme of everything is that several massive parts of my life are in transition and any one of them can be a lot to handle but their combine effect is a little overwhelming.
I'm really feeling the need to move into SF. Alameda isn't far away and it's quietness can be nice but it's just so damn dull (much like me?). I can't even consider it though until I get more stabilized career-wise which I thought I was until a month ago...hopefully things will work out there. I guess the theme of everything is that several massive parts of my life are in transition and any one of them can be a lot to handle but their combine effect is a little overwhelming.
