.. sometimes you get to the top of the mountain, the quiet, the stillness, the air... all of it creates a small sense of serenity that humans have to experience from time to time. THIS is where I find my peace. THIS is my church. Nobody can take THIS from me. Not now.... not ever...
So I feeling like I'm chasing my own ass right now. I am in the midst of a week where I'm working an extra shift and I'm kind of surviving on very little sleep. The good news is the extra cash will come in handy with my birthday a couple weeks away. The thing that sucks is that it seems to be a busy time for everyone and most of my friends are either working or going to be out of town during the weekend of my BDay (the 27th), and even my parents are headed back to Oklahoma during that time. There is someone who may be able to hang out that day, but its still up in the air as to if she can for sure or not. Hmmmm...not sure I've ever spent a BDay alone, but there are worse things to do I guess huh?
So last weekend rocked. I had my little girl. She is at such a fun age and its awesome to watch her learn and grow. She's totally a handful, but I wouldn't change her for the world. She's my little Ninja, and that being said, we spent the weekend wrestling around and me basically being beaten up by a two yr old. She is such a fun little kid. I had a brain storm the other day, and contacted Amina, asking if KYODT is able to make custom leather belts for little ones. Amina is a rad chick and got right back in touch with me, letting me know she is totally capable of doing them. So with that in mind, my little one wil soon have her own belt form KYODT with the name "MEAN BEAN" on the back. She will be totally stoked, as she thinks Amina has some of the baddest tattoos she has seen.
My MEAN BEAN with the smile that wraps me around her little finger:
Other than that, I got another tattoo. It's another nautical star on my left arm to fill in a big bare spot on my shoulder. Now that is done, I think I have all the stars in place and the next thing will be shading in between all of them. After that I may start on a chest piece before going on to my lower arm, but who knows. I may finish my left arm before that.. hmmmm, decisions, decisions.
My newest addition to my arm:
So that is me right now. Just flowing. My weekend starts tomorrow morning at 7AM, so I'm stoked to have a couple days off, maybe have a couple drinks of Sailor Jerry's and Coke, hopefully chill with someone I have been missing a lot of recently and just relax.
But before I go, I thought I'd kick some props/love to the awesome girls of SG....
A couple Hopefuls of interest:
JEMerlies, get over to her profile, open her set and do the right thing. SHOW HER SOME LOVE. She's a rad chick and I am sure would appreciate it
Barish has a new set coming out the end of Feb., like the 26th or so I think. Keep your eyes peeled fr it. It was shot by the talented Lorelei, and the couple of teaser pics I have seen are incredibly HOT. A peek:
And we can't forget the awesome SGs who make this site worth it day in and day out:
Kraven
Quinne
and Lovely
... are just a couple, bt some of the ones that jump to mind.
Until next time kids....
LATE!
So last weekend rocked. I had my little girl. She is at such a fun age and its awesome to watch her learn and grow. She's totally a handful, but I wouldn't change her for the world. She's my little Ninja, and that being said, we spent the weekend wrestling around and me basically being beaten up by a two yr old. She is such a fun little kid. I had a brain storm the other day, and contacted Amina, asking if KYODT is able to make custom leather belts for little ones. Amina is a rad chick and got right back in touch with me, letting me know she is totally capable of doing them. So with that in mind, my little one wil soon have her own belt form KYODT with the name "MEAN BEAN" on the back. She will be totally stoked, as she thinks Amina has some of the baddest tattoos she has seen.
My MEAN BEAN with the smile that wraps me around her little finger:
Other than that, I got another tattoo. It's another nautical star on my left arm to fill in a big bare spot on my shoulder. Now that is done, I think I have all the stars in place and the next thing will be shading in between all of them. After that I may start on a chest piece before going on to my lower arm, but who knows. I may finish my left arm before that.. hmmmm, decisions, decisions.
My newest addition to my arm:
So that is me right now. Just flowing. My weekend starts tomorrow morning at 7AM, so I'm stoked to have a couple days off, maybe have a couple drinks of Sailor Jerry's and Coke, hopefully chill with someone I have been missing a lot of recently and just relax.
But before I go, I thought I'd kick some props/love to the awesome girls of SG....
A couple Hopefuls of interest:
JEMerlies, get over to her profile, open her set and do the right thing. SHOW HER SOME LOVE. She's a rad chick and I am sure would appreciate it
Barish has a new set coming out the end of Feb., like the 26th or so I think. Keep your eyes peeled fr it. It was shot by the talented Lorelei, and the couple of teaser pics I have seen are incredibly HOT. A peek:
And we can't forget the awesome SGs who make this site worth it day in and day out:
Kraven
Quinne
and Lovely
... are just a couple, bt some of the ones that jump to mind.
Until next time kids....
LATE!
So the Saints did it!!!!! You have to love the story of an underdog beating the odds and pulling through. Was that not an awesome game? After their typical slow start, the Saints really poured it on and took it to the Colts. I did think it was unfortunate that Manning walked off the field as time expired and didn't have the class to congratulate Brees. That was pretty unfortunate, to say the least.
And with the ending of the game, just like that, the weekend was over. I had a hectic weekend, and it went by WAY to fast. I had a dinner business meeting on Friday. It was a laid back affair, just dinner and drinks at the Hard Rock, but was worth the time and effort as it looks like the MountainMafia will have a new title sponsor as of March 1. Its nice to see years of hard work starting to pay off. I know the guys I ride with all deserve it and they are all stoked to see this finally coming true.
Once Saturday hit, it was spending time with my little girl... the Ninja... my little Mean Bean. She and I headed out to do some shopping. I let her pick out some clothes, some toys, and some new bedroom stuff so she was pretty stoked. On top of that, she discovered some little action figures of the Disney Princess characters, so she was totally into those. Its hard not to drop a few extra dollars when the pay off is a smile like this.....
After some shopping it was off to get her haircut. She is VERY particular about her hair and clothes, so she let me know as we walked in that she ONLY wanted her bangs cut, and that she is letting her hair grow out. Tell me she's not 2 going on 22! So after like 3 mins in the chair, she bolted with a new haircut:
Once we got home, it was dinner together and then an entire evening of laying in bed and wrestling. She is so rough and loves to wrestle... the rougher, the better for her. Unfortunately, with the Super Bowl and her mother's plans, her trip this visit was cut short, and we had to leave NoCo for Denver as early as noon. It seemed like her visit was just a little blink of the eye this time, and I hate that. So now, back to the grind stone, waiting for the work week to start, and missing my little girl.
It looks kind of busy with some of th new sets coming out. Vice has a couple sets in MR, so go show that CO girl some love, and JEMerlies is still waiting to go pink, so do your part and help her out! Also, keep an eye peeled for a new set from Barish to come out on Feb 26th I think. She is another one that deserves to go pink.....
Until next time....
LATE!
And with the ending of the game, just like that, the weekend was over. I had a hectic weekend, and it went by WAY to fast. I had a dinner business meeting on Friday. It was a laid back affair, just dinner and drinks at the Hard Rock, but was worth the time and effort as it looks like the MountainMafia will have a new title sponsor as of March 1. Its nice to see years of hard work starting to pay off. I know the guys I ride with all deserve it and they are all stoked to see this finally coming true.
Once Saturday hit, it was spending time with my little girl... the Ninja... my little Mean Bean. She and I headed out to do some shopping. I let her pick out some clothes, some toys, and some new bedroom stuff so she was pretty stoked. On top of that, she discovered some little action figures of the Disney Princess characters, so she was totally into those. Its hard not to drop a few extra dollars when the pay off is a smile like this.....
After some shopping it was off to get her haircut. She is VERY particular about her hair and clothes, so she let me know as we walked in that she ONLY wanted her bangs cut, and that she is letting her hair grow out. Tell me she's not 2 going on 22! So after like 3 mins in the chair, she bolted with a new haircut:
Once we got home, it was dinner together and then an entire evening of laying in bed and wrestling. She is so rough and loves to wrestle... the rougher, the better for her. Unfortunately, with the Super Bowl and her mother's plans, her trip this visit was cut short, and we had to leave NoCo for Denver as early as noon. It seemed like her visit was just a little blink of the eye this time, and I hate that. So now, back to the grind stone, waiting for the work week to start, and missing my little girl.
It looks kind of busy with some of th new sets coming out. Vice has a couple sets in MR, so go show that CO girl some love, and JEMerlies is still waiting to go pink, so do your part and help her out! Also, keep an eye peeled for a new set from Barish to come out on Feb 26th I think. She is another one that deserves to go pink.....
Until next time....
LATE!
And life rambles on. Things have been hectic. Like CRAZY hectic. I spent the weekend with my little girl. She's 2 and-a--half now and it seems she is growing up way too fast. I really hate that, due to the divorce, I only see her every other weekend, but I totally try to make the most out of my time with her. My parents help me by watching her Friday nights while I work (props to them), and then its all me as far as taking care of her, and it should be that way. She is my responsibility. I picked her up Friday afternoon, and was exhausted. Its funny though, the moment I got her I totally forgot about being tired. I spent some time with her, then off to work. Its really hard to get my hands on her, only to have to leave for the night. I got home around 7AM to find her already up and at 'em. I had had two hours of sleep between Wed. morning and Saturday at that point. I grabbed two more hours (thanks to my mom babysitting a little longer) and then up for the day and playing with my little one. Here is a little glimpse into our weekend:
[VIDEO]
[/VIDEO]
She's probably the bets thing I have ever done... here's a shot of her from the past summer, modeling her tattoos:
Other than that, I have plans for more ink. I want to get more work on my left arm. I want to get one more nautical star on my upper arm, then more work lower and end up sleeved. I need a bunch of shading done between all the stars up top, and then some ideas for more stuff on my lower arm. It will come together.
I have met a couple new people at SG here. Its col that the majority of members here are so personable and friendly. Of course Kraven's blog is always informative and creative and fun to read, and if you haven't checked out Phecda's set, than do so NOW! She went pink in record time I think. And lastly, but not least by any means, go show some love to JEMerlies' set. She is a rad chick who deserves to go pink if there is any justice here.
So until the next update....
LATE!
[VIDEO]
[/VIDEO]
She's probably the bets thing I have ever done... here's a shot of her from the past summer, modeling her tattoos:
Other than that, I have plans for more ink. I want to get more work on my left arm. I want to get one more nautical star on my upper arm, then more work lower and end up sleeved. I need a bunch of shading done between all the stars up top, and then some ideas for more stuff on my lower arm. It will come together.
I have met a couple new people at SG here. Its col that the majority of members here are so personable and friendly. Of course Kraven's blog is always informative and creative and fun to read, and if you haven't checked out Phecda's set, than do so NOW! She went pink in record time I think. And lastly, but not least by any means, go show some love to JEMerlies' set. She is a rad chick who deserves to go pink if there is any justice here.
So until the next update....
LATE!
So, my work week starts tonight. Its going to be a crazy week, with very little sleep. I have my daughter this weekend, so that means I pick her up on Friday at 3pm. No big deal right? Well I work 7PM to 7AM, so once I go to work tomorrow night, I'm up until like Saturday morning sometime. I have to travel like 50 miles south to pick her up. So with drive time, errands, groceries, paying bills, etc. I;ll be cutting it close to get her by 3PM. Then we are off to No. Colorado... drive back up, get her situated for my parents to watch overnight for me, and then to work. UGHHHH!!!!! My little girl's mother's schedule changed, so when I used to pick her up on Friday and have her back on Tuesday... now I have to drop her off on Sunday afternoons. It drastically cut into my time with her, so I'll be sacrificing sleep to get the most pf out our time together. Speaking of my little ninja, here is a vid from her last visit, where she is bossing me around suing some of her sign language:
She is a handful to say the least, but I wouldn't change her for the world. She's all rough and tumble, and loves to play hardcore.
Other than that, I'm wishing I was spending time with someone special to me. Things are crazy... still off, from me fucking them up so bad. I'm not sure how to solve the situation, but I just want it fixed ya know?
Life is rambling on. I need to find a new job, a new place, and NEED to get up and go snowboarding SOON!!!!! Other than that, more work in the tattoo department to come in the near future.
Other than that... go check out Phecda's set in MR review today. She's a rad chick who deserves to go PINK, so go show her some love.
OK... that's all... I'm out.
LaTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She is a handful to say the least, but I wouldn't change her for the world. She's all rough and tumble, and loves to play hardcore.
Other than that, I'm wishing I was spending time with someone special to me. Things are crazy... still off, from me fucking them up so bad. I'm not sure how to solve the situation, but I just want it fixed ya know?
Life is rambling on. I need to find a new job, a new place, and NEED to get up and go snowboarding SOON!!!!! Other than that, more work in the tattoo department to come in the near future.
Other than that... go check out Phecda's set in MR review today. She's a rad chick who deserves to go PINK, so go show her some love.
OK... that's all... I'm out.
LaTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK, so don't you hate when you fuck up? I'm not talking about just kind of screw up, but I mean REALLY fuck up!!!! So, since I have got myself in the current situation I'm in, I blew off going out with my friends last night, grabbed some dinner alone, came home, had a cpl drinks and really did some soul searching. Let me break it down for ya....
I hurt somebody that I care about (and she professes to care about me) IMMENSELY! I mean REALLY hurt her. The kind of hurt that really fucks up a good thing that we had going. The really jacked up thing now is, I don't know how to completely fix it. I mean it is impossible to say a phrase, or perform some quick action to make all the pain and hurt disappear, and trust just magically return. Unfortunately life is never that simple. You see, I spent a good deal of time after my divorce REALLY trash talking women, and undoubtedly developed a fear of being emotionally hurt again. I vowed never to be in the situation ever again. I constructed huge walls around me, distanced myself from a lot of others, and was generally just very guarded. The worst part is, that once I started hanging out, seeing, growing close to, falling for this girl.... well, my defense mechanisms ultimately ended up breaking her heart, and destroying her faith & trust in me.
So now I'm searching... searching for the way to put it all back together. I have become very aware that I'm unhappy without her, miss our times together, and feel like I have a huge empty hole where she used to be. I don;t know if I'll stumble across the magic to mend things, and can only hope that I do, but in the mean time I put that effort out there, hope she can see that I care, and keep praying I'll be afforded to do things the right way with her instead of learning a very hard lesson.
I don't think we stumble across others who truly understand us very often in life. I know in my journey I haven't had the fortune of having a person TRULY understand me and what I am about... until I met this one. She has unselfishly taken the time to see my for what I am, as much as I let her. She is probably the only person who has ever been around me that accepts things about me that scares others away. She is nothing short of the chick I had hoped to find, and now its up to me to fix the damage that has been done.
I have no idea if she'll see this, or take the time to read it. If she does I hope she knows I am deeply sorry, I care for her probably more than she thinks I do or understands, and I miss her. I miss her friendship, her presence, and just knowing that she is there.
Man I do not know how I get myself into these things.....
On a different note... my little girl is getting way too big. She still loves her tattoos, and is still all about the black fingernails....
Me with my little one....
So I am trying to stay positive, going back to drawing some (hopefully that will be therapeutic), and have decided to run a marathon this year. I need to be snowboarding since the snow is sick this year, and will hopefully get up to make some runs soon. OK, so now I'm rambling... time to find a movie online to watch. Smokin Aces 2 it is!
You guys take care....
LaTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hurt somebody that I care about (and she professes to care about me) IMMENSELY! I mean REALLY hurt her. The kind of hurt that really fucks up a good thing that we had going. The really jacked up thing now is, I don't know how to completely fix it. I mean it is impossible to say a phrase, or perform some quick action to make all the pain and hurt disappear, and trust just magically return. Unfortunately life is never that simple. You see, I spent a good deal of time after my divorce REALLY trash talking women, and undoubtedly developed a fear of being emotionally hurt again. I vowed never to be in the situation ever again. I constructed huge walls around me, distanced myself from a lot of others, and was generally just very guarded. The worst part is, that once I started hanging out, seeing, growing close to, falling for this girl.... well, my defense mechanisms ultimately ended up breaking her heart, and destroying her faith & trust in me.
So now I'm searching... searching for the way to put it all back together. I have become very aware that I'm unhappy without her, miss our times together, and feel like I have a huge empty hole where she used to be. I don;t know if I'll stumble across the magic to mend things, and can only hope that I do, but in the mean time I put that effort out there, hope she can see that I care, and keep praying I'll be afforded to do things the right way with her instead of learning a very hard lesson.
I don't think we stumble across others who truly understand us very often in life. I know in my journey I haven't had the fortune of having a person TRULY understand me and what I am about... until I met this one. She has unselfishly taken the time to see my for what I am, as much as I let her. She is probably the only person who has ever been around me that accepts things about me that scares others away. She is nothing short of the chick I had hoped to find, and now its up to me to fix the damage that has been done.
I have no idea if she'll see this, or take the time to read it. If she does I hope she knows I am deeply sorry, I care for her probably more than she thinks I do or understands, and I miss her. I miss her friendship, her presence, and just knowing that she is there.
Man I do not know how I get myself into these things.....
On a different note... my little girl is getting way too big. She still loves her tattoos, and is still all about the black fingernails....
Me with my little one....
So I am trying to stay positive, going back to drawing some (hopefully that will be therapeutic), and have decided to run a marathon this year. I need to be snowboarding since the snow is sick this year, and will hopefully get up to make some runs soon. OK, so now I'm rambling... time to find a movie online to watch. Smokin Aces 2 it is!
You guys take care....
LaTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK, so I'm in Denver for the weekend, hanging with the boys (and some of the chicks) from the Mafia. If you ate just running across the blog, and aren't aware, the MountainMafia is a Freestyle Motocross / Freeride Mtn Bike / Snowboarding / anything else we want it to be team based out of Colorado (Denver specifically), and we hope to have a new website & YouTube channel up by early-to-mid Spring. Due to work schedules, relationships, kids, etc we haven't had the chance to ALL be together in quite awhile, so the fact last night worked out totally on the spur of the moment is pretty amazing.
So after some cocktails downtown @ Lucky Strike it was out and about. We saw the Blue Bird, the Gothic, and more than our share of small dive bars, which seems to be where the group thrives. So all in all a good night. No one got too sick (although it wasn't from lack of trying, hitting the Jeagar), nobody went to jail, and everyone got home safe. Tonight? More of the same. As crazy as it sounds, the planets may all just be in the right alignment for the entire team to once again be out and about in the streets of Denver. And while I didn't grab my camera before leaving NoCo, one of my best friends, Sierra (a totally rad chick) grabbed pelnty of pics last night, and plans on more tonight, so hopefully I can get those posted in my next blog entry or two.
About the only other thing going down is I got another tattoo... this one is my son's name. I made the jump below the shirt sleeve line and placed it on my left forearm. So now there is no going back. I'm going to start working towards getting my left arm sleeved, and then we'll go on the right. Probably means a lifetime of long sleeves at work, but I'm cool with that. Here's a pic of my daughter's name I had done on my right side, rib cage a few months ago, and then one of my son's name on my left arm now.
So now, while I don't have custody and see my little girl only every other weekend, and my son who lives in Tx even less often, I still have a piece of them with me 24/7.
I hope you all are doing well... priming for the Super Bowl parties, and loving life. With the holidays over, hopefully you all can catch your breath and start to settle into the new year. It's going to be a full one around here, and hopefully I can use the blog here to spread the word about Mafia demos, parties, and mayhem during the spring and summer. If anyone wants more info on anything the team is involved in, message me here and I can get you in touch with my boy who is taking care of all that shizzle.
So, until next time.....
LaTe!!!!1
So after some cocktails downtown @ Lucky Strike it was out and about. We saw the Blue Bird, the Gothic, and more than our share of small dive bars, which seems to be where the group thrives. So all in all a good night. No one got too sick (although it wasn't from lack of trying, hitting the Jeagar), nobody went to jail, and everyone got home safe. Tonight? More of the same. As crazy as it sounds, the planets may all just be in the right alignment for the entire team to once again be out and about in the streets of Denver. And while I didn't grab my camera before leaving NoCo, one of my best friends, Sierra (a totally rad chick) grabbed pelnty of pics last night, and plans on more tonight, so hopefully I can get those posted in my next blog entry or two.
About the only other thing going down is I got another tattoo... this one is my son's name. I made the jump below the shirt sleeve line and placed it on my left forearm. So now there is no going back. I'm going to start working towards getting my left arm sleeved, and then we'll go on the right. Probably means a lifetime of long sleeves at work, but I'm cool with that. Here's a pic of my daughter's name I had done on my right side, rib cage a few months ago, and then one of my son's name on my left arm now.
So now, while I don't have custody and see my little girl only every other weekend, and my son who lives in Tx even less often, I still have a piece of them with me 24/7.
I hope you all are doing well... priming for the Super Bowl parties, and loving life. With the holidays over, hopefully you all can catch your breath and start to settle into the new year. It's going to be a full one around here, and hopefully I can use the blog here to spread the word about Mafia demos, parties, and mayhem during the spring and summer. If anyone wants more info on anything the team is involved in, message me here and I can get you in touch with my boy who is taking care of all that shizzle.
So, until next time.....
LaTe!!!!1
