I'm too busy with things I find more fulfilling to bother with this site much. Sorry folks, you won't see much of me

I don't know what more I can do.
I am indescribably disappointed and heartbroken. I'm not sure if whether it's fair for me to go as far as to feel betrayed, but my heart is in turmoil right now and I'm not gonna lie, that's how I feel, fair or not.
I made some underappreciatedly potent sacrifices, and now I have to live with those for the rest of my life even knowing they came to nothing. I would have gladly made a lot more, and would have had to do so... maybe I should thus look at this as lucky in that respect but it's hard to feel anything but pure loss right now.
The extra lousy thing too is that my plans for the future might have to change, as at this point I'm not sure to what I'd really be returning. It's going to be pretty desolate and filled with increasingly few allies as more people I love with all my heart turn upon me. I don't think there'll be a place left for me, given that.
Things will have to change completely for the first time in a long time. I don't know what that will look like.

A summary of the last three and a half months:

• Things were looking up


• Then things were looking down


• Now some things are looking up and other things are looking down

That is all

It's November so I should update my blog. But things are largely the same. Work is okay, choir is okay, the band is okay... I'm just starting to see a new girl, maybe something good will come of that

Happy day-before-Labor-Day!

...Are you in labor?

Well FUCK you then, get on it



Uh, yeah, things are good overall. Nothing much to report at present.