i'm not sure how much longer i have on my account, so i'll update now...

hmmm...
she and i have not talked at all about my crush on her. we'v avoided it completely... i was really down about this... then my little friend josef told me that she had confided some things in him (i haven't decided whether i believe him or not)
1. she has been into me a long time
2. she thinks i'm hot and in not so many words would love to fuck me
3. (and here's where it gets tricky) she's uncertain about clint and his role in everything
4. she has a girlfriend
and
5. she wants someone to love who will love her back...

this is exactly what i was expecting (except for the whole she wants to fuck me part) so, i am just waiting for her to come to me and talk... we talk alot at work and it's starting to feel comfortable again... josef said that he thinks she's waiting for me to make a move, but given the things she's worried about, i dont think that's a good idea...

time will tell...

hopefully going to a gay bar tomorrow night... whoo hoo!
and shopping all day tomorrow...

love you all
and i am open to advice