So, will today be just like any other day ? I spent my day yesterday with one of my besties, it was a lot of fun. We went to the flea market where I bought myself a nice lil stone bracelet and skirt. A flea market is a place one would expect to go and pay very lil money for things, but not Qmart. $50 dresses, skirts and pants! We walked around awhile, I had a slice of pizza, Maryann had herself a gyro and her mom bought a plate of Puerto Rican food to take home with her. Both of them came to America from the Philippines, I'm so proud to have such an exotic friend.

And for your viewing pleasure, this is my new skirt, shawl and furry boots!!!



After shopping we went to her house and her mom gave me a lil lesson on my sewing machine, now I know how to use it! We spent some time at her place before leaving for mine, got to enjoy watching a thunderstorm together !! When we got to my house I showed her the new stuff I bought recently, we sat and talked about life while she paged through my new SuicideGirls book that I got for half price when I reactivated my account. My boyfriend eventually came home and we all just hung out till she had to leave to pick her boyfriend up at work. All in all, it was a nice day.



Another thing to make me happy as of lately, today my Bedazzler arrived in the mail, I can't fuckin wait to use it !!! So now I have that, my sewing machine, hot glue gun, now I just need to make time to go to a fabric store and start making clothes!!! I can't wait!!! I hate buying something that I love but is just missing something to give it that wow factor, now I can give clothing the wow that it needs. Once I've mastered the craft of designing and sewing, I plan to make and sell custom clothes. I suppose knitting would also be a nice craft to take up, with the baby coming I have so many doctor visits and knitting is something that can be done in a waiting room. For now, I have my sewing books to read though.

I really hope things start getting easier for me, everything just hurts so much right now. My son is a complete terror! The other week he damn near burned down my kitchen when he turned on all the stove burners with pots and pans still sitting on them! The other night he turned some knob in the toilet's top tank and flooded the entire bathroom, water even leaked through the floor into the basement! He's into everything, sneaking into where he doesn't belong, sometimes even outside! I just don't understand, he has the sweetest personality, very polite, kind and considerate. Why is he compelled to literally ruin things? Does he know he's causing damage or does he think it's okay to do what he does? He is also different when we take him to another person's house, he is on his best behavior.



Isn't he the cutest?

Something I've been noticing lately: just about EVERY Blockbuster Video has gone out of business!!! Their movie rentals got so expensive while online delivery options give us better prices and more convenience. I definitely enjoy the convenience, however, I do miss the trips to the video store!!! I miss going to the video store with my man and pick out movies, it was nice running into friends sometimes too. So many changes over the years and even the tiniest things can snowball into something huge, something you may not notice could be having this huge impact on you right now and you don't even realize it. That's how I feel about Blockbuster.

Most places to go and shop are more than 20 minutes away and being pregnant I just don't feel comfortable traveling too far when I'm alone. I would love to just go out shopping all by myself. There's a lot I need to start accomplishing regularly and I just don't. I get so tired! I sleep most of the night and the rest of the day I fight to stay awake. So to sum it up, my life feels so unproductive.

I can't pussyfoot around it anymore, I'm sad and lonely. Shawn is the only one I'm close to, now he has a full time job, I just sit at home and do nothing. I also have lil to no motivation when I feel as sick as I do sometimes. And trust me, there's nothing pretty about randomly your cheesy fiesta potatoes right in the middle of Taco Bell! Now I'm hungry for cheesy fiesta potatoes! Well, I guess it's off to Taco Bell, all by myself.

Been having some self esteem issues lately, even though I know there's no reason for me to. I am very happy with who I am and how I look, I don't subscribe to labels so when it comes to clothing I wear what I like. Ranging from "gothic" to "hippie", I wear it all. I love to clash and mismatch. I listen to all kinds of music, rap, metal, classic rock, etc... I'm an artist, I'm creative and unique, I am not like other people. So what's the fuckin problem? Is it just pregnancy hormones?! I hope so, only about 6 weeks left till Aurora's born and then the post partum emotions to deal with and it's OVER!! Ahhh, normalcy...

Some stuff I bought recently...

First I'd like to say how good it is to have a laptop again and my suicidegirls.com account active, I've felt so cut off from everything I like. Totaling my new car has landed me $22,250 and I've been using that money to get a less expensive car and the rest to get back on my feet. So far nothing, I want a VW Cabrio which is gonna take some looking around for and we're still calling landlords about properties. I can't wait to have a home I can arrange exactly to my liking and call MY OWN. And less than 2 months till my baby is born, it's been a long road and I can't believe it's almost over! I certainly hope for a positive hospital stay, my last child's birth was so hectic and I don't want to go through that again! So we shall see, won't we?

Okay, so I've been browsing the hopefuls and I'm sort of confused. Still trying to work up the courage to shoot and post my own set, I browse the sets in hopefuls and I come across soooo many sets that don't come close to following the guidelines. Becoming a Suicide Girl would mean the world to me, to be a part of a community that accepts the tattooed, pierced and all around colorful. It frustrates me to see so many girls not take it seriously and follow the guidelines.

I split my tongue more, yay!

So I'm single again and it sure is weird. Don't really like it. Having fun nonetheless though. What to do with myself lol??

Work Work Work!!! So turns out I'm going to be taking sculpture, black and white photography and painting this semester. I'm making some cool friends, I plan on not falling behind in assignments, I plan on doing well. I have a creative mind, yet I feel as if I have a wall between that and my hands. And color mixing, ugh. I missed a lot of classes the first time I took painting, even missing just one is a big deal, missing out on an entire class lecture.

Aside from that, I've been loving life, I love Jim and I can't wait to see what wonderful surprises life throws my way!

Lots of pictures are up, take a look!!! I still need to take some new ones of me, with my boyfriend, more photography... Haven't had much time to do stuff like that, I busted my ass to get a lousy D in art history. Next semester starts January 19th, I can't wait for the fresh start. Jim and I have a class together again so I'm absolutely psyched, that's speech communication. I also take english and black and white photography so I will definitely have new photos in the near future regardless. I feel like a natural with a camera, I love to capture the beauty I see in the world and always keep it with me, I just don't get to enjoy it enough.