Monday, January 2, 2012: Blowing Smoke Up My What???
So- we officially had the first "Death Snow Blizzard" of 2012. Yeah- had, ladies and gentlemen. What I would like to know is exactly where did the 2 feet of snow fall? Cause it wasn't here. Sure we are having the fluctuating "snow bands" on and off but gees- talk about a shit ton of hype and hysteria over frickin' nothing!!!

Add to that the hysteria people were forced into over this crap! Sure we did get the 50 mph winds on Sunday- big deal! It got windy! WHOOPIE!!!! Seriously? I am so far not impressed by the local weather guessers that it borders on sickening! Pathetic! No actually it is P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C!!!

In other news- my weekend recap in a few words- MEH, OUCH, & RANGOONS??? Friday was just that, meh. It came, it went, it wasn't honestly spectacular. Saturday morning came early and painful when I woke up around 1am to realize that I could not move and I was in extreme pain. Hubby got out the massage table then around 2am and proceeded to feel my back , neck and shoulders- deducing that my C2,3,&4 had somehow, someway popped out of alignment again- resulting in catastrophic distortion of all my neck and shoulder muscles on the right side. Right down to messing with the circulation in my right arm (it was cool to the touch, kinda purple, and really tingly- oh and I couldn't hold a glass of water with my hand. He beat on me with the energy balancing mallet and sticks, deep tissue massage till I was weeping and we went back to bed.

Upon getting up around 8:30am, I was still in pain, but less than before. So I took a hot shower to limber everything up, loaded up on Tylenol and made another date with the massage table and Hubby. This time he was a tad more aggressive with the mallet and stick, getting in at least two of the out of place cervical vertebrae. I called the doctors and amazingly enough got an appointment with my chiropractor for 11:30 Tuesday morning. Thank god! While I'm fairly certain my neck is almost completely back into place- I still have a tolerable level of pain currently with the occasional wicked bad spasm- I want the good back breaker to slam everything in place and then explain to me why I seem to be having cervical vertebrae popping out when they want to when I have had no trauma to support this issue.

Hubby did a few putter projects around the house, fixing the janky shower door and installing a new light fixture above the kitchen sink- occasionally cursing my grandfather's building skills as he worked- while I brought in a massive amount of firewood to stock up for the impending "Death Snow Blizzard".

Saturday night- Hubby and I made Chinese food to celebrate the New Year. Well- we made an attempt. I put together a 3 delight rangoon mixture of crab meat, lobster meat, and tiny shrimp mixed with cream cheese, then fried them in canola oil. We also attempted to make veggie spring rolls. They went doughy, didn't fry worth a poop, and didn't taste all that wonderful. After filling up on these, we took a hot tub outing at my parents’ house, came home and since I wasn't hungry yet, Hubby made himself a seriously "Man vs. Food" style dude burger- lots of meat, red pepper spiced blue cheese, savoy cabbage, and tomato slices on whole wheat bread- while I nibbled on a pop tart. We watched Dick Clark's Rockin' Eve and kissed at the stroke of 2012, while cuddling Doggie Pup. It was splendid.

Yesterday- we both slept in a little, me more than Hubby... He woke up before me and went out to the living room to read more of his book. He started the book Friday evening and as of last night around 9pm- he finished it. Lovingly looking at me saying- "Okay. Done. Could you buy me the next one please?" He's now finished "Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" and "Girl Who Played with Fire" books. I believe the next one is "Girl Who Poked the Hornet's Nest?" I just have to find it for him now- Meijer's was sold out- must be everyone else in the world started that series recently

I told him I was going to give myself a nickname--- "The Girl Who Plays with Markers" since I have recently been on a doodling denim tear as of late. Is it my fault those three new pairs of Goodwill jeans, and three new denim Goodwill skirts are begging to be doodled? I think not! Plus- it's kind of a fun tweaky little high you get from doodling with permanent markers for five hour stints... But it does leave you with a wicked bad head ache- must get better ventilation in the kitchen, me thinks.

But- I should put this first official blog of 2012 to bed. I need to start prepping dinner for this evening- Kim Chi Chiga. For those that don't know what the hell that is... Kim Chi is fermented Korean sauerkraut with lots of hot pepper spice. And the Chiga part is cooked pork steak. We're going to have a big pot of that, since Mouse is staying over again tonight- the weather down south of here isn't conducive to driving in. Kim Chi Chiga over rice with a roaring fire in the fireplace...

Could someone please pass the Tums and fire retardant gloves?? Kthxbai!!!

Thursday, December 29, 2011: Stuff and Old Wounds

First- the old wounds bit...

Today in the grocery store- I saw a girl that went to high school with me. She looked older, hagged, and completely miserable with her three loud children in tow. This made me smile. Seeing the sadness in her eyes made me a touch gleeful inside. During school- she was one of a few that took it upon themselves to emotionally beat me daily. She harassed me about my weight and how I was a gross fatty (never mind the bitch had 150 plus on me- I WAS the fat one). She ridiculed me about how I was shy to get nekkid in the gym locker room, what was I hiding? She called me horribly foul names directed towards being a "farmer" (I was in our high school chapter of Future Farmers of America more less because I didn't fit anywhere else and being in a student organization at least made you belong something). She ripped me about about who I had crushes on and how pathetic I was doomed to be. I didn't make it a point to tell her who I was in the store today- instead I laughed. Out loud. When I realized who she was- how "gross" or "nasty" and completely run over by her children. I laughed.

Those other bullies?? Two were once my "best friends" in high school. One know looks like a very ugly man (she's female) and about 10 years ago the other tried to clear her conscious by apologizing to me for her behavior in a few letters, which I generally told her to fuck herself and leave me alone... If only that would have worked back then in high school. Is it any wonder to anyone why I am so all for Lady Gaga and her mission to eradicate bullying? Really? I was mercilessly tortured my entire school life by someone or other so I know how it feels to be bullied all the time.. It sucks. It hurts. I'm only glad I didn't let it eat me alive!!!

In the stuff category... SD Mom and Dad were here over the Christmas weekend. They arrived Sunday evening in time for me to serve my delicious beef and veggie soup with whole wheat french bread. Monday, after Hubby got home from work (yes, he worked on XMAS day, but it was holiday pay...) We had breakfast, opened presents, and then headed out into the day. We drove down south to near Holland to venture into the new nature center and trails there. I took tons of fabulous pictures... Then we went to lunch at G&L in Grand Haven. After filling our growling tummies- we headed to Duncan's Woods in the center of the city.

Over the course of our hike there, I hyper-screwed my right knee somehow and have been paying for it ever since. Goddess bless the new extra strength Bayer Aspirin! Tuesday morning- they headed back to SD in the pouring rain and cloudy crap weather while Hubby rode along with me to work.

Yesterday- while I had a list of things I wanted to get done here at home- none of it happened. Work took longer then I wanted (do to stupid people, mechnical F*ups, oh- and stupid people). Then Hubby came hone after a couple hours in the office with puke tummy. So- as hard as I tried, I did not feel nearly as accomplished for the day as I wanted to when we went to bed last night. Today- I am playing ketchup! I have updated my 365 project- we're past 300 pictures! Wahoo! I'm writing this blog, cooking dog chicken, sorting photos from the weekend's adventures, and probably picking up the house, doing laundry, and working on a doodle project for my friend J Bear. Good thing Hubby's at work- I can fly about doing three things at once and no one can yell at me to slow down so my hobbled leg can keep up

I can print book-like copies of my blogs by year- including pictures. Shoot me an e-mail at lady.inkblot@gmail.com if you'd like to get your hands on a copy. I know I can make copies of the 2009, 2010, and 2011 year of blogs for your enjoyment!

Also in the first week of January- I will publish on here my "Year in Writing" Review. It's a little scorecard I keep for myself over the course of the year that falls in line with my daily writing quota- yes I have been writing on top of house life and photography. It makes me feel accomplished.

A little quirky- I know. But I got the idea last night to interview myself It's fun to think how I would answer these questions... And I did

As I, the nervous interviewer, awaits the arrival of the astounding woman I am about to interview- I nervously peck at my Cesar salad with grilled chicken, noticing I had random bits of animal fur on my new black sweater. I pick them off, praying she doesn’t arrive to find me doing this- how awful that would be. I fidget with my black moleskin notebook’s edges, wishing they hadn’t looked so tattered when a hushed gasp begins to emit from the surrounding tables. I look up to see her- Lady Inkblot, casually strutting through the lobby of the Dorchester Hotel’s café… She’s wearing a form fitting white thermal shirt over what appears to be a men’s A-shirt. Her jeans, the proper amount of demolished, are adorned from hip to cuff in her unique style and highly sought after doodle artwork. She unravels her grey knit scarf a turn before slipping her movie star sized black sunglasses into her backpack/camera bag before taking a seat across from me. She jots down an autograph on a napkin for our waitress before ordering bourbon on the rocks, and a slice of coconut cream pie. We fill the time waiting for her order with casual small talk before starting the interview.

MP: What is your idea of perfect happiness?
LI: Sleeping in late with my gorgeous Hubby every day, never having to change the batteries in my camera, and not having to pay for gas. All entirely impossible, but fun to think about, right?

MP: What is your greatest fear?
LI: I wouldn’t dare divulge my own personal fears to you, but I do have a greatest fear for the general population… That the true freedom of being yourself will never go persecuted. That there will always be someone to bully someone else into suicide.

MP: Which historical figure do you most identify with?
LI: I’d like to think I am a blend of more than a few. Those that really know me know who I fashion bits and pieces from.

MP: Which living person to you most admire?
LI: That would have to be Lady Gaga… She has balls. She does. She doesn’t give a shit about what people think of her and goes full on into sharing her beliefs about how wrong things are or how great things are. She isn’t afraid of anything, and I absolutely love her for that.

MP: What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
LI: That I cannot look in the mirror and see the same beauty my Hubby does. He always tells me that I am this stunning, sexy, gorgeous woman and I CANNOT see it when I look at my reflection.

MP: What is your greatest extravagance?
LI: It sounds so completely lame, but I consider a good long trip to a couple area Goodwill stores as an extravagance. Where else can you find broken in jeans for three dollars? A little marker doodling and BAM! New fashion statement!

MP: What do you dislike most about your appearance?
LI: For me, and for me to know only…

MP: What or who is the greatest love of your life?
LI: My husband. He showed me that there is someone out there who will love you no matter what. And my doggie-pup. The amount of love that little dog can give with just one look or one thump of her tail could melt the coldest of hearts.

MP: What is your current state of mind?
LI: Frazzled. I’ve got so much going on inside my brain right now between photo ideas, things I want to shoot, work on my novels, things to draw- that I simply can’t focus on any one thing.

MP: If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
LI: Not sure if there’s just one thing…

MP: What do you consider your greatest achievement?
LI: Every time I capture something mundane with my camera lens, making it look new or foreign- that’s a great achievement. To zoom in and take a close up of the inside of a regular garden flower- showing a view of that flower you’ve walked past a hundred times but never really saw before seeing that photograph… It’s mind blowing.

MP: If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?
LI: A dung beetle.

MP: If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?
LI: One of my guniea pigs. They are so horribly spoiled.

MP: What is your most treasured possession?
LI: My wedding band. Each time I look at it- I know he’s out there somewhere, still loving me.

MP: What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
LI: Being told you aren’t worthy of being loved. I struggled with that most after my first marriage failed. To be left completely alone for no fault of your own- save for the asshole that put you there…

MP: Where would you like to live?
LI: In a three bedroom, one story house in Snead Ferry, North Carolina. Safe from the brutality of hurricanes, but close enough to the beach to dash over there whenever I felt like it.

MP: What do you value most in your friends?
LI: Their true ability to call me out on my bullshit.

MP: Who are your favorite writers?
LI: To name just three- Hemingway, Faulkner, Patterson. Stieg Larson, may he rest in peace, is quickly rising to the near top of my list.

MP: Who are your heroes in real life?
LI: Absolutely anyone in the EMS/Fire Department world. Anyone in the military- especially the United States Marine Corps.

MP: How would you like to die?
LI: With passion, doing something that I truly loved.

MP: What is your motto?
LI: You don’t like me? Fine. Take a number and sit in line with the rest of the bitches.

Here I am... Finishing up the last of the editing for the next set for Orka to go into MR. Well, as soon as I submit it, it will go into MR. And I keep watching the little clock in the corner of my computer screen- tick tick tick... 7PM and Orka's set will go up on the front page in MR. Check out "In the Corn"!!

I really hope this one does well. I'm acutally pretty certain that the set I just finished editing will do better, but I am uploading them in the order in which she wanted them. Check her out in the debut setGirl and Her Firetruck.

Also, please... While you are checking out this sultry Michigan girl's sets, show some love for another couple MI girls Kirin; Lexer; and Remi. They all have sets deserving of front page- but they need your help!

We may not be getting a white Christmas up here, but they deserve a present right?

I kinda feel like this, actually. One stationary main part with millions of branches sprouting and shooting off into different directions- yet... Yet, hear I sit, listening to the plastic wrapped window breath with the gusts of gray mist filled freezing wind.

I shot myself in the foot today with the discovery of my photo shop program doing what I want, where I want, and how I want in big multi picture batches. And blammo- a few simple keystrokes turned four hours of photo editing into ten minutes of watching the computer do it to perfection for me. Damn. Well- good news- I am completely caught up with photos. Bad news- I'm staring out the window at the dank dreariness of a gray December day. Blah...

Third blog of the week- odd right? Well, in no uncertain terms, I was told yesterday by Globug that I haven't been blogging a lot lately. "How else are you venting if not by blog?" she asks. I think I've become numb to a certain situation that would cause me to vent. Why hold onto all that rage and anger about a situation on my life that will not change. Least not in the near future a few select people would love so greatly. While I am still pissed about what is going on- it isn't fair to Hubby for me to linger on it- save for when the complete bullshit problem surfaces time and again.

I absolutely hate what is going on. I truly do. One highly ignorant person is causing such total anger for other's then me and as much as we all would like this issue to resolve itself- it won't. And that sucks. I have completely surrendered to the fact that my Hubby is on call the 23rd, 24th, and 25th. Yes- Christmas weekend. We will not be going out and buying a Christmas tree because of this. Instead we decorated a house plant/tree with lights and small ornaments. We hung our stockings on a curtain rod. I will honestly be lucky to have him home long enough to celebrate the holiday with my family. I don't plan on him being home on Christmas Eve. I don't expect him to be home on Christmas Day. It's amazing to me he was granted enough time to spend a day with his family that will be in town on the 26th.

Does this suck? Yes. Outside of not having any snow outside, coming home to a decorated houseplant in the living room and not a beautifully, allergy inducing variation of pine- really sucks. But what would be the point of spending the money on a real tree, that will drop needles and make a mess anyhow- when Hubby won't and hasn't been home enough to enjoy it? Shit happens. There will be Christmas next year and we will get a real tree then. I don't need to be told how depressing it is to have to plan on my husband not being home for that one weekend filled with sentimental value. We have no children, unfortunately cats dogs and guinea pigs don't count to most people, and that puts us in the minority at his company. Those with children get higher regards when it comes to getting to spend the holidays with their families. In spite of the amount one stands to make in overtime/holiday pay this coming time- there will be a sick call or a "I don't feel like working" call in and off Hubby will go. Hubby just got his 15 year pin, and yes, I know it is sickening to that he doesn't get the respect he deserves due to time in at one place. You can put money down that he won't be there to get a 20 year pin.

But why continue to be mad about it? Why? What's the use? If I open my mouth, he'll get fired. Just because he cannot and will not control me. Would I like to? Hells yes!! I would love to stand up in the face of the two select assholes and let them have it for a good three hours or until I loose my voice or get the cops called on me. I'm sure I would certainly feel better afterwards, being handcuffed in the backseat of a cruiser and smiling like an idiot. But where would it get me? I've dealt with this shit before. Being powerless to stop the crap going on against me and my husband, yet being held to blame for it. I did take care of it then. A face to face with a person in management, telling him to get his house under control or I will sue it into submission with the power of my lawyer. That cooled it. Handled. A year later- the worhtless bitches to blame for my misery had been fired.

But how do I do that this time? Yes, I do have back up by way of the other jilted supervisor's wife in my corner, but who do we go to? The CEO? The CFO? The board of directors? Because going to the next one down on the totem pole- the first of two parties instigating the crap right now- won't do a damn bit of good. That's like driving 85 miles an hour down an icy country road and trying to sue the road commission for your spinning out and totaling your car. Pointless! Fucking pointless.

So instead of being constantly, gut churning pissed off- I am numb. It's safer. That's why I refused to socialize anywhere near the hierarchy at the Christmas party- instead I socialized in the safety of dispatch. I had one drink to loosen the noose of anger long enough to smile once or twice. I chose to ignore the pissy looks from one certain person that doesn't agree with how I feel about her husband. And I completely blew off any attempted nicey-nice from a member of management because it sickened me to even humor him with a smile. And I will not lie- the fact that greasy pizza served on paper plates instead of catered prime rib- damn near defined what's been going on in the company to those not priveleged enough to see it for themselves make me almost burst at the seams with evil laughter and giggles.

In the end- karma will get what she wants. And I will be standing there with the tap to a keg of "I fucking told you so" when she finally gets her way. Until then, aside from snippet rants here and there when my nipple gets twisted just so, I will be numb.

To Blog or Not to Blog...

I have been busy. Like get one thing accomplished and another four pop up on the list. Ever have one of those weeks? So other then crazy schedule- I'll start this at the evening of the Christmas party- last Wednesday...

So after going to pick up Hubby (who was at work on the truck- go figure), we drove down to the main office where the party is usually held in the community room. Once getting there, we noticed there were no catering trucks. Hmmmm- they are usually there by five pm. Minutes rolled by, I was chatting with some of his co-workers in dispatch, when by one way or another- we found out that the Head Lady In Charge (HLIC) was not happy. Why? Because the caterers thought the party was on Thursday, not Wednesday. OMG! This is not good. At ALL. She was hovering a good six inches off the floor she was so pissed off and honestly none of us blamed her. She's the type of woman you do not cross- at all. For no reason should you tick off the HLIC. If you do- just duck and cover when you see her, or worse yet- just dissappear.

Once the confusion was settled, more people had arrived and turns out- instead of a catered taco bar, prime rib bar, pasta bar, and dessert table- we were going to be served pizza. Mind you this party is kind of a big deal- like the Board of Directors attends this shin dig. And the looks on their faces when they found out they were going to be served pizza instead of prime rib... Ooooooh. Funny for the bulk of us- since the bar was open and we were all lubed up anyhoo. Hubby was awarded his pin for 15 years of service at the company- an accomplishment he'd been waiting for.

Thursday- I had a friend from Up North EMS stay the night- we'll call her Rainbow Heart. She tagged along to my photo gig up in the Belding area. I was to take pictures of the most adorable baby with the most beautiful parents. It went very well. Then RH and I went to din din at Taco Bell, shortly after, my truck decided to be a punk bitch and have transmission issues! Ugh. Dammit. So we limped my truck home, got into her car, and went back into GR to pick up a present for one of her friends.

Friday- First actual measurable snow fall in Ottawa and Kent Counties. I'll shorten this by simply saying- WTF you moronic assholes? Michigan + December= snowfall at some point!!!

Saturday- Hubby had the entire day off and we spent it together. Hanging out around the house and doing things. Hubby also made the absolute best pancakes. Honey wheat base with the added yumm-o factor of chopped pecans, almond, dried cranberries, dried blue berries, and dried cherries. With a side of sausage links drenched in real Michigan Maple Syrup. Dinner for the evening? Indian Chicken Khorma with rice, potatos patties with Greek yogurt and mint chutney, and Chana Masala (spiced chick peas).

Sunday- After breakfast and decorating of our Nor Pine (a potted tree I've had for years) for our Christmas tree this year, we got dressed and went out to the Meijer Gardens. They created a "Train Garden" for the holidays with all the village buildings being made from organic materials. I will post picutres later this week. I introduced him to my two favorite docents at the gardens. These two gentlemen make any visit there better just by their cheerful faces and willingness to answer questions. I asked them both what their favorite parts of the gardens were so as I can make them framed prints

After four hours at the gardens, walking around both inside and outside, I had taken my fill of 600 pictures and we were in need of nourishment. So we went to a place called the "Twisted Rooster", imagine the jokes I was making... Bent C___? What? Anyhoo- we had the fried pickles in Maple Mustard Sauce; the Lobster Mac 'n Cheese; and for dessert- PB & J Tiramisu!!

Gourmet yumminess!!!!! Then last night, I worked on Hubby's back. First making him do stretching exercises to loosen the muscles up. Then walking on him- that got his lodged out of place vertebrae almost completely in. Then I broke out the candles, massage table, and New Age music and proceeded to pound him for another half an hour- getting his spine back in place, along with both shoulders, both hips, and his knee. I gave him a flexerall to keep the muscles loose so his back stayed in place and we heated up left overs for din din. Then the flexerall kicked in and Hubby was rendered whacked out for the rest of the evening. I put him to bed and cleaned up the house before going to bed for the night.

Today- I have finished editing the photos from the baby shoot, also the girl+smores photo shoot. I am finishing up this blog. I have to fill out paperwork to send along with cd's of photos to mail otu tomorrow, address and finish Christmas cards, and sort through the pile of photos from yesterday...

But before I go- I must tell you all my new favorite song is: "Marry the Night" by Lady Gaga- for this line if nothing else: "... I won't give up on my life/ I'm a warrior queen/Live passionately tonight/... We're gonna burn a hole in the road..." That and the video is pretty damn cool. Someday (maybe soon) I will tell you all why I like Gaga so much...

Look for even more Gardens photos later this week!

As a baby- adorable, cute, innocent…

Trying to figure out how it worked, it only took a couple years before I had it disassembled there in Gram’s living room.

I think this is where the nickname “Chelle Bear” my dad has for me came from.

Still cute, even sans front teeth. Mom still cut my hair at this point. Amazing what hot rollers did for a bowl cut!

Growing out the infamous bowl cut. The tomboy is ever so slightly peeking out.

Ahh, the 80’s. I loved Axel F, Depeche Mode, Howard Jones, and totally in love with my rose printed white jeans! And Gram loved taking photos of me.

Soon, the didn't have a boyfriend till senior year, country girl teenage me grew boobs and a fondness for having my picture taken. So when my senior pictures photographer suggested I model for him after my 18th birthday…

I gave it a whirl.

Every 18 year old still in high school did artistic nude modeling, right?

Hint hint… Remember that tree? Go look for it in Kirin’s Green Summer set

As my first marriage ended- I still did modeling. Easy to make money- all I had to do was sit there and look pretty naked for a couple hours.

Wow- so that’s what I looked like without tattoos? I had a really nice butt… Wonder if it still looks that good? Surfing did a body good.

And look at me now… What the hell happened? Oh yeah! Life! Life happened! Now I’m snarky, funny, opinionated, and a photographer. Life behind the lens now days is so much more fun.

Why oh Why??


To first off warn each and every one of you who read this blog- it will not be nice. My ability to be nice has vanished into thin air much like my ability to sleep. I am completely incapable of having any form of a censorship button due to the fact I have been awake since 02:30 this morning. The one time I actually attempted to doze off was exactly five minutes before my Hubby’s cell phone rang- at 04:00- sharp. That being said- to give everyone the tenor of my most despicable mood- don’t most normal, rational people with a hint of intellect check their phones prior to going to bed for the night? Is it that difficult a thing to check, ya know, when you’re figuring out if you should plug it in to charge overnight? Wouldn’t you then see that you missed a call or two? Like say, about important stuff like- oh, I don’t know- if two vacant slots in the next day’s schedule had been filled. Your fellow co-worker wondering if he should prep his gear for the next day or not? Apparently, this is too complicated a feat for some people to do. Instead- they don’t answer their missed calls, do not check their voicemail, and call my Hubby at o-dark-o’clock to say sorry man, but I need you to go fill a shift at blah-de-blah. Really? REALLY? This could have been solved last night and helped me hold onto some semblance of a better mood if not for that phone call this morning. I have absolutely no tolerance for people incapable of doing their damn job as pre-determined years before hand. Stupid, childish, idiotic behavior such as this common affliction has permanently soured me to one particular individual and no way in hell am I going to think differently from here on out. My Hubby would catch holy-hell should he have not checked his missed calls or messages, but yet this dope gets away with it. What-theF-ever.

Yesterday- Hubby took his one day off. We went out to breakfast at our local favorite food joint- Grand Coney. We were seated in the back corner round booth and all too soon did I realize things weren’t going to end well. Our waitress, Carly (real name), had the wonderfully polite- whatever mood going for her. Taking fifteen minutes to get us our simple orange juice and water, and even then another waitress brought it to us, not her. Add to that another ten minutes and she finally took our order, acting like we were this major inconvenience for her. While we waited, creating small talk amongst ourselves, it became apparent that I may actually kill the two gentlemen in the booth behind us. They were middle aged men, one wearing a Western cut sports coat (hello- both Oklahoma and the 80’s called- they said you look stupid!!), chatting about the Bible and church services. Then the older of the two, made this loudly stupid statement- “Nowhere in the book of Revelations does it say I shalt be submissive to my wife. I am a man, and I should be able to act like it once and a while, shouldn’t I?” The look on my face must have been absolutely precious since Hubby forced himself to not laugh out loud. My first thought was- then quite being such a pussy. My second thought, after Mr. Western 80’s chimed in with- “well, sometimes we have to be submissive to let the women in our lives realize how much they really need us…”, I’m sorry- Jesus, God, and whoever didn’t create the Bible for pathetic men like you to utilize in quotations while stroking your egos and pretending your penis’ are bigger! If your wife is THAT emasculating- grow a pair, divorce the bitch, and carry on! The Bible was not written as the ultimate man’s guide to why you are your wife’s bitch!

With my mood being ever so slightly tainted, and with many a joke made at the expense of religious-wusses- R- them, Hubby and I went to the grocery store to pick up a few things for our adventures in baking we had planned. I HATE HOUSEWIVES!! HATE THEM, HATE THEM, HATE THEM! I hate how they wear a pair of ratty sweatpants with a fashionable blazer to the grocery store, carrying with them the attitude that they are in fact hot shit. I hate how three of them with overloaded carts dripping with children, completely block off the baking aisle to play catch up with the other mom’s- and when you clear your throat, making them realize they are in fact not the only people in the entire store- you receive the you don’t have a litter of ankle-biters, fuck off and die stare! I hate how the “older” ones snottily stare down your line of items on the grocery belt like- Oh my god- they are going to BAKE something! Are they married? Do their parents know? How dare they bake together- why it’s, it’s, IT’S TUESDAY! I only wished we had put up a jumbo tube of diaper rash cream, the super huge party box of condoms, a jug of vegetable oil, three boxes of saran wrap, and a tub of whipped cream! That would have been worthy of a stare! And since we are talking about the checkout lane- why in the holy hell is it necessary for the older then dirt, slightly stupid cashier to read to me my entire receipt, right down to hove much I saved today and am I saving up my rewards points? Is it any of your damn business? I think not!

Hubby giggled as I spouted of my general disgust of housewives- saying only “You know, you are one too.” I am, I am a house wife. But I am also the anti-housewife. I work a part time job, keep the house clean and funk free, I pay the monthly bills, take care of the animals, yard work, and grocery shopping. I exude more creativity then a shopping list. I am writing two books, a blog, and trying to get a small time photography business up and running. I have “housewife” friends that have full time office jobs, kids in numerous sports, and still I’m sure they have better things to do they play catch up in the grocery store aisle proving to be in the way of general daily shoppers like me. Meanwhile I’m sure the most creativity expounded by these bitches in the store is writing grocery lists, honey do lists for their poor bedraggled husbands, and the occasional tweet about how cute Junior was just now when he wet burped his stewed veggie baby food. Maybe they go so far as to post blurry, crap-tas-tic snap shots of little Daisy picking her nose and feeding it to the dog on their Moms-like-me pages. Those housewives in the store yesterday are the reason I had to listen to a pathetic shell of a man quote scripture to regain some form of his masculinity!

Another observance in the grocery store- College Girl. She was the moody, brooding college bitch. Picture if you will- really big heart shaped face(with matching super-sized head), with the super poofed grown out Bieber-turns mullet, way too much eye make-up, fake red leather coat, and too tight black jeggings that- I’m sorry, either go commando to wear a thong, but granny panties under tight pants- just not good fashion sense! She was standing with that crappy half slumped, brooding Goth poet posture, staring long fully at the Greek Yogurt section- then would flash her heavy black eye lined eyes like a paranoid drug fiend if you whispered, burped, or squeaked a cart tire near her. WTF? She’s going to grow up and be a housewife- I can feel it.

We finally got home, put away groceries, and after doing the weekly pellet stove cleaning- Hubby taught me how to bake cinnamon rolls. I know exactly nothing of baking outside of boxed cookie mixes and how cool it looks when my SD Mom does it while she’s in town. So Hubby gently taught me how to make dough, then how to knead dough. I would get frustrated when his looked better than mine, claiming my cinnamon rolls would be stupid because I broke the dough. He would smile at my flour covered clothing and face and reassure me that they would be fine. We set the dough aside to rise- and oh my god did it! Our smallish blobs of sugary dough turned into bowl eating monsters! We then rolled it out, added the sugar, butter, cinnamon mix- rolling the sheets of dough into long tubes. We cut them, placed them in pans and waited until they “doubled” in size. Doubled my ass! We pulled the towels back after an hour and they had puffed and puffed and were spilling over the sides of their homey little glass pans. Once they were in the oven- Hubby taught me how to make frosting for the cinnamon goodness. We added orange zest, orange peels, and a little homemade vanilla extract. I was having more fun licking the beaters, the frosting knife, and the droobles off the counter!

Hubby sure does know how to make a poopy morning go better. Too bad he’s working a 48 hour shift and can’t make today any better than it is doomed to be. Tomorrow afternoon I have a photo shoot scheduled for here at the house with the lovely Azkedellia. Friday, I get to go grocery shopping for the first annual Cousin’s Christmas Gathering Tex Mex Style (gives me a reason to play “Feliz Navidad” over and over) we are hosting on Sunday evening. Saturday- Hubby and I will be in one Christmas Parade in Rockford, stopping to buy at tree on the way home- setting it up, then rushing off to Lowell for the 6pm Christmas Parade. Can anyone else say- Non-effin-stop much?

Hello!!!! So just to get business out of the way- please please please go show tons of love on Orka's set A Girl and Her Firetruck

And since Orka's set went up Kirin's set Green Summer has gone up a touch. Must be the photos of Orka at the shooting of this set.

We are all super proud of these sets and really want to see them on the front page sometime in the future! So please, go show some support for those hottie Michigan Girls!!!

In other news... I had a glorious weekend with Hubby, who didn't have to work at all all weekend!!! Saturday we drove out to the city of Greenville where he'd spotted an awesome cemetery. I about flipped my lid. I have never seen so many crypts (especially ones built into the hills) as there are in this cemetry. It was a photo shooting bonanza!!! I've currently got a thing for photography old time cemeteries and I think the oldest we saw thre Saturday was a headstone of a person buried in 1862... Very cool. I have a ton of photos to sort thru from there so as soon as I get some edited- look for them posted here on SG.

After the cemetery walk- he and I went to a farewell party for one of his co-workers. This guy is going to Kuwait to be a paramedic for a year. It's great money, but a long time for someone to be gone from his fmaily. That's why I'm not so keen on the idea of my Hubby going over there for a year. I was married to a Marine that was over there and while he was in the war fighting and Hubby would only be doing service on a base... I' still don't want another husband going over there unless he has too, is that selfish?

Yesterday, Hubby and I went grocery shopping. We spent way too much money, but it was fun none the less. We love people watching and what better place to do that then a grocery store? The afternoon was spend here at home, hiding from the cold dreary weather outside and for dinner- homemade pizza... Oh yeah... It was a good weekend!!!

My girly Orka is seriously rocking with her first MR set!!!!

http://suicidegirls.com/members/Orka/albums/site/26391/

Go love on it, please??? Pretty please? I'll love you forever!!!