I have already convinced myself that there isn't anybody on this site that will take the time to read this, so I guess that would have to mean that I am talking to myself. As I sit here and type my little heart out, and wonder why, but then I in turn answer myself and say, I said I was going to do this, post pics of me that is, so I did. Anyhow I still can't help but think, where does all of this lead to. I chatted with two people today, one Hopeful and one Suicide Girl, it has been one year since the Hopeful gave up and withdrew and two years since the Suicide Girl, although still active has fallen by the wayside because of inactivity. So please anyone who might read this please respond as I am coming up on my one year aniversary in February and at this present time am not sure as to rather I am re-upping or not. Good night all ...

Let me see if I have this right. I don't think I have ever posted a blog here on this site (SG) before. I joined, or paid my couple of dollars here to be able to go on and check out all of these wonderful, beautiful girls back in February 2009. So much has gone on in my life lately, I have made, or I think I have made friends here, but maybe I am wrong. I start out emailing back and forth with people then all of a sudden or not so sudden the emails stop coming. Whatever. It seems like if you want to have friends on this site it is important to show people what you look like, for the life of me I can't figure out why that is important. I think if you are applying for an application to marry someone it might be important, after all who wants to marry someone ugly, right??? But I can't help but think if the people on this site were world class then they wouldn't be here on this site, they would be at least affiliated with models.com, maybe just a notch above SG. I really truly am wanting to try and make all efforts before finally throwing my hands in the air and giving up. After all renewal date isn't until sometime in February 2010 . In any event it is really tough being ones own critic, as I am sure everyone knows. I am totally out of my element looking at photos of myself or sitting and/or posing for pics, I could never be the type of person so many people here on this site are the ones that can freely post their pics for the whole world to see. I am not totally scarred or disfigured and I have always felt like I fit somewhere in between Tom Cruise and the Elephant Man as far as my appearance goes. . So I am going through old pics and still looking at buying a new camera so I can post, but only ones I feel won't scare people away. 23 November, 2009