@rambo @lyxzen @missy
Right, As I am totally new to the whole blog Homework thing, I thought Id start with the one and work my way down the list :)
I have always been interested in modelling and getting 'famous' for my look.. Yes I am totally vain!
I have always hated my body, before and after having my children! I had been bullied and picked on for most of my school/college life! I was picked on for being 'different' I was pretty much the only girl with really short boy hair cuts and my uniform was always passed down from my brother and sister (My parents couldn't pay for new uniforms and tbh with the prices of them I wouldn't of wanted new ones anyway!) I felt comfortable with the way I looked but I hated the fact everyone else thought it was ok to take the piss... Between the ages of 10-16 I was called fat, lesbian, gay, tramp.. you name it I was probably called it, I hated being called a Lesbian! at that time being called a Lesbian was horrible and wrong! I didn't see myself like that and knowing other boys and girls didn't like me for the fact I looked boyish was horrible! I spent my years hidden away in the classrooms, break and lunch Id sit on my own protected by my tutor, He knew I felt isolated so let me watch online movies and trail through Facebook :P
When I left school, I never wanted to feel like that again! I fell out with my parents due to my depression and the fact I hated myself, which rubbed off on them... I was so argumentative it was unreal! I ended up moving into a hostel, as we just couldn't live together any more. I became more depressed, more suicidal and I hated life! I lost weight, Id stopped eating, going out, Id stopped living! Id given up.. Until one day I thought Fuck this!! I defiantly couldn't live like it any more. I was with my boyfriend and he could see what it was doing to me, wed broken up and got back together so many times -.- I eventually moved out and ended up in my first flat. Already I was feeling so much better. Yes, I put on weight due to me feeling better about myself and eating better, but it was good! I added healthy weight and not long after I fell pregnant with my first daughter.
From then on my life changed completely! I knew nothing was going to get me down! I changed my look, I changed my attitude, I got on better with my family! after the birth of my first (At the time my bf had left) daughter I wanted to make life better for the both of us.. I left it awhile before getting into work, I didn't want to miss her first few months, but I was looking for online work, I did the whole Avon work and started my own make-up selling business. Id moved into a new home with my new boyfriend (we've now been together 2 years)
I filled in my application for suicide girls (Nov 2014) after reading about the group of people! It was welcoming and friendly and I needed that In my life, unfortunately I didn't finish as I fell pregnant with my second daughter. But I had been modelling whilst pregnant on other 'pay to view' type sites. So I knew eventually id finish and upload a set! Id done a few professional shoots and slowly my confidence flew back to me, I still get the odd comment on my weight or my look but tbh, I do not give two flying fucks what people think about me now! I spent too long being hidden away and I am not going to let people put me down! I've had two beautiful healthy baby girls and yes I am plus size And yes I have lumps and bumps, But damn I make money from my body.. And I make men and women all over the world happy for sharing it :P
I have only had my SG account a few weeks and already I've had lovely comments on my blogs and photos, I have over 70 followers and tbh I didn't think id be very popular! There is so many stunning beauties and so much variation! Its amazing that I got 1 follow let alone over 70 :) Thats what I love about SG, there's no 'oh no, you're too fat' 'Oh no, you don't have the right look' I was accepted and I feel privileged to be apart of such an amazing group of people!
Never again will I shy away from what I love! NO PAIN NO GAIN!