Shit got fucked. My best friend died. It still feels weird writing those words. He had been living in hong kong for the past 4 years. I found out on dec 23rd that he had been missing. We did everything we could to find him. His sister went to hong kong so she could make sure the police were doing everything. A few days later she identified his body in the morgue. He had been dead since a few hours after he was last seen on the 21st. We don't know yet how he died or why. It doesn't really feel like it matters anymore. We don't even know when he will be cremated and sent home. We all need a memorial.
I really let my life get away. I started drinking really bad again. Lost all my money, went off my meds, fucked my head up really good. Once I had blacked out enough and realized I couldn't pay my rent I got scared sober. I havnt touched a thing since the tenth, and I plan to stay clean until the 10th of February. Hopefully by then I can be working again and be a bit stable. In the meantime, I have to make some money. I'm hopefully going to submit a set soon, I've been wanting to explore this option for a while, and there no time like this time. I've also picked up playing guitar again. I'd like to be writing songs but I don't seem to have it in me anymore. With any luck I can maybe pick up a few gigs and get enough cash to pay at least one bill.
I've also been very interested in camming. Something else I've been thinking about for a while but never really persued. I'm not sure of how to get started with all and how to set something up for tips, so if anyone has any advice I'd be very greatful. It would be so wonderful to do these things everyday and pay my way doing things I'm interested in and passionate about. Ok enough about the dreary hand of been playing.
I am currently watching twin peaks in bed on a Saturday night, eating away my cravings for alcahol and cocaine. I really need to get back into a workout regimen if I'm going to keep passing the nights like this. Pilates and yoga were really doing it for me. I can get right back at the Pilates as ive always been doing it at home but I know almost nothing about yoga and I can't afford to get back into a class now. I'm wondering if there's a good free tutorial or YouTube type situation that could help me out. I'm going to have to ask the yoga group!
I've been watching tons of horror and gore lately. My late friend had a huge passion for it and turned me onto it a long time ago. If anyone reading this is a fan and has some good recommendations please post them. I would recommend to you a French film staring Beatrice dalle called "A L'interieur". It does not dissapoint.
I'm dying to get back into reading but I have at least four books started, and although none of them are easy reads, I'd feel silly starting a new one. Maybe instead of watching Clueless everyday I should pick up one of the books.
Nah.
I'm crazy about baths lately! I'll post some bath pics once I get my computer back from my friend. That also means I can't post any photos right now, as I'm writing this from my iPhone. But if you want to see all the photos I like to take check out my tumblr!
Steviedawn.tumblr.com
I also have a twitter that I like to update often with things I think are funny.
Twitter.com/stev0id
So if you're someone who has lots of luck please send me wishes of wealth and happiness. Ive never needed it this much in my life.
I really let my life get away. I started drinking really bad again. Lost all my money, went off my meds, fucked my head up really good. Once I had blacked out enough and realized I couldn't pay my rent I got scared sober. I havnt touched a thing since the tenth, and I plan to stay clean until the 10th of February. Hopefully by then I can be working again and be a bit stable. In the meantime, I have to make some money. I'm hopefully going to submit a set soon, I've been wanting to explore this option for a while, and there no time like this time. I've also picked up playing guitar again. I'd like to be writing songs but I don't seem to have it in me anymore. With any luck I can maybe pick up a few gigs and get enough cash to pay at least one bill.
I've also been very interested in camming. Something else I've been thinking about for a while but never really persued. I'm not sure of how to get started with all and how to set something up for tips, so if anyone has any advice I'd be very greatful. It would be so wonderful to do these things everyday and pay my way doing things I'm interested in and passionate about. Ok enough about the dreary hand of been playing.
I am currently watching twin peaks in bed on a Saturday night, eating away my cravings for alcahol and cocaine. I really need to get back into a workout regimen if I'm going to keep passing the nights like this. Pilates and yoga were really doing it for me. I can get right back at the Pilates as ive always been doing it at home but I know almost nothing about yoga and I can't afford to get back into a class now. I'm wondering if there's a good free tutorial or YouTube type situation that could help me out. I'm going to have to ask the yoga group!
I've been watching tons of horror and gore lately. My late friend had a huge passion for it and turned me onto it a long time ago. If anyone reading this is a fan and has some good recommendations please post them. I would recommend to you a French film staring Beatrice dalle called "A L'interieur". It does not dissapoint.
I'm dying to get back into reading but I have at least four books started, and although none of them are easy reads, I'd feel silly starting a new one. Maybe instead of watching Clueless everyday I should pick up one of the books.
Nah.
I'm crazy about baths lately! I'll post some bath pics once I get my computer back from my friend. That also means I can't post any photos right now, as I'm writing this from my iPhone. But if you want to see all the photos I like to take check out my tumblr!
Steviedawn.tumblr.com
I also have a twitter that I like to update often with things I think are funny.
Twitter.com/stev0id
So if you're someone who has lots of luck please send me wishes of wealth and happiness. Ive never needed it this much in my life.