Yay it's October!

I get to move next week.... and I am starting a new job.

I hate working

I am so ready for this month to be over....

Yeah... I got tired of that post. The girl issues are still going on. I keep running into Jay Z's 99 Problems song. It makes me laugh. As far as the girl is concerned I told her we should hang out soon and she is supposedly going to call me. I hate leaving it up to her because girls never call but what choice do I have?

I am looking for work a little more strenuously and that is my new focus for the week. I have to let other things sort themselves out and I have a feeling I will know where I stand soon enough. However jobs need to be applied for if I have any dreams of getting one. I don't really want to work but my money is depleting very quickly even with unemployment coming in every week.

I started writing another short story last night... well kind of. I have the opening sentence tumbling through my head and a few story paths sketched out in my head. I just need to pick a course and go with it.

I may just be the biggest idiot in the world.

I am sure my non-existent readers are wondering what I mean.... or maybe my pretend friends are thinking "you just figured that out?" Anyway if I had readers I would be looking for some advice right here..... but since I don't I am just going to write and hope it relieves some anxiety.

When I last wrote I had confessed that I was hanging out Saturday night with this girl I have a crush on. I was so convinced that I had no chance with this girl by the time I got there that I failed to realize I was staring at my chance. See usually my roommate is around to kind of get me mentally ready for my outings but he was off running about with a friend and I was sitting around for hours waiting to meet up with this girl. While waiting (or pacing) in my house I was trying to think of how to see if my crush was something I should bear in silence or if it was something I should try to pursue. My ultimate decision was that she was not interested, mainly because I have self esteem issues. So anyway we met downtown and had some food..... When I saw her I did a double take because she was wearing this sexy little black dress and heels and I had rolled up in shorts and sandals. I had dressed up a lot compared to my normal standards considering I was wearing a polo shirt. I was confused by the dress she wore and then just decided it was what she wore to go out because I was viewing this incident through my "she couldn't be interested in me" glasses. Then she seemed really happy to hang out and wanted me to do karaoke and kept saying "I want you to sing a song for me" and the entire time I was thinking "there is no way she is interested". So I let her pay when she insisted which I would not have if I thought I had a chance. I did that even knowing she had complained about a guy she went out with letting her pay and she didn't think he was that interested...... yeah.

So I told my friend about the night and he said "Dude that was a date." To which I said "Really?" He then painstakingly pointed out everything I missed.... things I had pointed out to him one night when he met a girl and had "relations" with her. If I had not pushed him a bit he would have let her go home. I had no backup of course and I am an idiot so I screwed the pooch. My only response was "Then I fucked up big time and I am not sure I will get a chance to recover."

Anyway I have talked to her today and she seemed to be in a hurry to get me off the phone which was different then any other conversation we had before. She claimed to be busy but I just don't know for sure. So I guess I just need to continue to put in work and maybe I can manufacture a second chance....

Damn it!

Oh and my car is all f'd and I am dropping 6 bills to get it fixed.

FUCK AUGUST!!!!!!!!

Well it has been hotter then hell the last 2 days. Portland has been over a hundred degrees two days in a row and it looks like it will continue through tomorrow. Last night I went out drinking because the bars have nice cold liquid. i got really smashed and my plans to go hiking fell through as I did not get up until 1 pm. Yeah 1 pm! What was even worse was we had some people replacing one window in every apartment. It is this little tiny useless window but whatever. ANyway that meant around 9 am they were banging away.... it was terrible with a hangover! I was still too drunk and exhausted to do anything but lay there drifting in and out of consciousness between them hammering away. When I finally got up I decided to go to the mall where there would be AC. I decided to see a movie and chose Mirrors... terrible movie! Anyway I ran into this girl I have a huge crush on and we are hanging out tomorrow night! yay! After the terrible movie I read in Barnes and Noble until nightfall.

It was kind of a weird week. My roommate and I decided to get out of town during a 90+ day because we lack AC and our house gets super duper hot and nasty. It takes all night to cool it down and nobody gets any sleep. So we went out drinking Tuesday night to plan our trip.... Yeah... impaired judgment always helps! Hehe Anyway Wednesday when we dragged ourselves out of bed we headed to the coast. We made a pit stop at a swimming hole and played in the icy water and soaked in some rays. Our destination was Cape Lookout just West of Tillamook. Anyway we stopped to get supplies (beer and snacks) in Tillamook before heading to the campsite. While getting the food we realized we were entirely to lazy to cook so we decided to stop at a restaurant. I wanted Taco Bell but my roommate insisted on hot food at a restaurant. I was trying to get him to go to a steakhouse that did not seem that badly priced but he said it looked to rundown (which meat it probably was pretty good because it has been around for a while). He sets his sights on this restaurant across the street that looks awful to me. In reality it was. The service was slow, they ran out of what we ordered, their food was more expensive then most of the steakhouse entrees, and their food was mediocre. Anyway he conceded defeat. So we headed to the campsite and it was full. We thought no big deal there has to be more sites along the coast..... we were wrong. There were 2 for a 60 mile stretch and all were completely full. So we ended up in Lincoln City in a hotel room.... We are adaptable and decided to take advantage of drinking in a small town. We did the "a few drinks before I go out so I drink less thing" and that of course was a total lie. We had about 8 beers each while we were out, 4 at the hotel and 3 at the beach. We were totally fucked up....

Anyway the first bar we went to seemed lively. A lot of really ugly locals were in there, they had decent taps and weren't too expensive. We were enjoying some pin ball and we even selected some songs on the jukebox. That was when it started getting weird. This guy started talking to us and next thing we know we are playing pinball with him. I think he liked my roommate but my room mate likes women so he was up shit creek. Anyway that guy left and then ended up bringing some hideous chick back and told her I had a crush on her..... She was drunk and she though I was just being shy when I said I did not. SO first chance we got we ran. The jukebox had not played our songs yet and we had 6 credits in the pinball but I had to get out before she got more friendly. She had her hand on my ass for 20 minutes and that was more then enough.

We holed up at a joint that looked dead but was actually a pretty lively karaoke bar with a few cute ladies. I sang I drink alone by George Thorogood. Then we took a drunken walk on the beach after successfully not meeting any single ladies (boo!). We drank and philosophized until 3 am.

We decided to check the beach out in the daylight and it was nice but I preferred the drunken night view. Anyway we headed home. When I logged on to do homework I saw that I had a test on Saturday. A test I had signed up for and paid 120 bucks to take. I freaked a little because I had no prepared at all but then I said what the fuck at least I wouldn't miss it. I took the test today but won't know the results until September

Well this is the week after I had a wonderful trip to San Francisco and I have been totally procrastinating on homework for my class. It is stupid homework and a stupid class so motivation is lacking. Anyway I am editing some of the pictures from San Francisco and they look great... I have posted several to my blog already and I am working on the final days pictures... I did not take very many that day so they won't take long....

This weekend I am going to check out the Red Bull Flugtag that is happening in Portland. I am hanging out with a friend on his birthday and Sunday I am kicking it with two of my nephews while we wait for their mother to fly in that evening. They are staying the night before heading home to Phoenix early in the morning.

I went camping this week and I feel completely rejuvenated and happy. I think I needed to do something different and camping was it. We were next to a river, we barbecued, had some beer, rode bikes and hiked. It was a great time and I am glad I went. It restored some of my lost appreciation for the state of Oregon.

Oregon is a beautiful state and there are a lot of outdoors things to do but I kinda forgot that amidst all the bad. The bad consists of a terrible job market (it was bad before this recent recession) and the difficulty to form a group of friends. I can still count the people I hang out with regularly on one hand and not for lack of trying.

Oh well... it is summer and I am going to enjoy it....

After I write a paper for my class....

So.... Tuesday I received my replacement phone and I charged it and got the stupid thing working and charged. Then I took all the emails I received with numbers I had lost and I put them in the phone and then I dug my organizer our and added other people's numbers that did not email me but I have their numbers written down. Anyway I was sitting here today and I wanted to play a game but all my games are gone.....so I went to download and it let me look through the games and select one but then it gave an error. So I called my phone company and I told them and for 20 minutes they goofed around trying to fix it but it never happened. Then they said the error message requires the phone to be replaced but since this is a replacement phone from the phone insurance people I need to get a hold of them. They transfer me over there and I get a "We are sorry the phone call can not be connected as our network is down. Please call back later."

So anyway I may be getting a replacement for my replacement....

Just for fun I decided to lose my cell phone today..... Yay!

Wait... boo! Damn it!