
life is like this:
busy
obsession
busy
whiskey
sleep
i'm going to try using Tumblr. we'll see how it goes.
courtneyriot.com
THINGS:
- i finally updated my website.
since i'm no longer at suicidegirls, i've been focusing on what the next move should be. oddly enough my dream job is available. it's also in new york city. i thought about this for over a week. i've filled out their entire application and moments from sending it in, i deleted it.
i'm qualified and i'm charming. they would totally (maybe) fucking hire me. however, the idea of getting my dream job right now doesn't seem right. i can't explain it. the beauty of this is that when/if they are hiring and I'm ready, I'll be even more qualified, more charming and they'll possibly have a position in a different city that I'll have fallen even more in love with.
- this weekend i'm hoping to see these guys:
Zoetica named this genre Lazygoth. we will go and be lazy. in capes.
- images while you listen...
- i lose my health insurance in a few days. this is a big problem considering i'm always dying. my doctor sends me text messages; yes, it's true. i'm sure i'm fine. i just know my body and my head. i know when something is off. i also have access to webmd.
- attempting to quit smoking. psychologically it makes me think i'm not dying. i guess this works out well with the insurance ending soon. fortunately i no longer have the terrible cravings that were making me an unbearable cunt. unfortunately, i go out a few times a week and meet friends for a drink which keeps me from fully quitting. i use their bad habits to justify mine. it's working out well right now.
- NYC. mmmfff. everything i thought i would love, i loved. everything i thought i would hate, i really hated. it was perfect. dirty, inspiring, beautiful and chaotic. I miss Reagan, Fractal and Bee. I'll go back very soon.
That's definitely not all, but my attention span is moving towards the bed.

I'm better at Twitter.

i've been busy.
i fell in love. with new york city.
i'll tell you about it when i have time to update. maybe tonight.
it's funny how many people are trying to emulate kenneth anger now. i wish they used glitter though. lots of black glitter. homo magic.
When I was sixteen I worked 6 days a week after school. I did this from 14-18. I spent 40% of my money on Aqua Net hairspray, 20% on cigarettes, 20% on old jean jackets and black straight leg jeans, 10% on studs, patches and buttons and 10% on concert tickets. If I ever have a kid, they'll take photos like these to show and tell. Or ignore me.
And now... after 6 years of working for SuicideGirls I am only working 2 days a week. Work is slow and my sarcastic, amazing humor became too much for them to handle. It's okay. Really. They still give me coffee and I still make them laugh. When the news dropped I thought I would have a few days off in between finding another job. Turned out I got a job the evening after as Creative Director for a management/record label/world destroying company. Awesome.



I'm still restless. I want to find people to collaborate with artistically. Not for money, not for fame. I don't want to work on a project that you want to add to your little life-story book; something people will look back on and think of how cool and beautiful and wonderful you are. I don't want to do something that is for other people. I want to just do something for me. For us. I think everyone in LA wants the money, fame and addition to their little story book they keep under their pillow.
I'm going to NYC for the first time ever in a few weeks. I'm going to smoosh the face and crush the bones of one of my best friends, Fractal. I feel like I haven't seen her in an eternity.
Life is fucked up, beautiful and making my body hurt. So much so that my doctor is making me wear a heart monitor. Thump, thump, thump, beat, beat, beat.
I'd like to go to Europe again in November. I will go alone this time. Where should I go?
In all honesty, I'm really terrible at using any form of social networking. I'm okay at Twitter.
I'm restless.
I've been hunting for change.
THINGS:
1. Coilhouse

- Saturday I spent the entire day and night with the Zoetica, Nadya and Mer. We spent the time plotting and scheming, laughing and eating delicious curries.
- Coilhouse 05 is selling incredibly fast. My jaw hit the ground the last time I opened an email stating how many sold. That was on Saturday, so I can only assume a few more have disappeared since.
- You can buy the latest issue here.
2. Random
- When I'm not at SGHQ, I've been spending most of my time working at home:

- half the time is spent trying to learn after effects:

- and the other half looking out the window

- i haven been so busy designing and fucking around with motion that I hardly have enough time for this:


- Z wanted nice pictures of the haircut she gave me, so I took a special one for her

- I had Cosi and Dot over for the 4th to drink and eat food on my roof.


- Cosi took flattering, beautiful pictures of me that captured the entire day/night quite well

- we kicked this guy out of the hot tub, simply for confirming all of the reasons why I am terrified of most people


3. Bands/Videos/Songs/Music/Noise that I adore.
I listen to a lot of really fantastic and terrible music.
Always + Forever
The Velvet Underground
The Birthday Party
Joy Division
Nico
My Bloody Valentine
Sonic Youth
Elliott Smith
Cat Power
PJ Harvey
13th Floor Elevators
The Damned
The Cure
X
Blitz
Stiff Little Fingers
The Adicts
Stuff I have grown fond of over the last few years...
The Kills
Final Fantasy
Beirut
Amazing Baby
The Knife
Animal Collective
Crystal Castles
Cold Cave
Heartsrevolution
Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros
Chairlift
Darker My Love
Beach House
Autolux
The Libertines
Dead Man's Bones

we had another earthquake today.
i keep thinking the ground is shaking and my building is moving.
i check to see if the blinds are moving or cups are swaying from the rack.
paranoia is an understatement.
I wouldn't mind another vacation.
THINGS:
1. Paris
2. Barcelona
3. Los Angeles
4. Coilhouse
5. Video Test
- I got a new camera and tried to make a video:

Bigger, better version is here.
6. Random thought
- Sometimes I obsess over things and people that I shouldn't. I just recently started noticing this.
zoetica shaved the side of my head the other day.
i look like a fucking asshole.
i returned from europe...two weeks ago.
i've been thinking about writing a proper update for a little while now. maybe this weekend.
this photo was taken last week on a night that was full of terribly bad decisions.

lesson learned.
If you walk around the side of the roof and hop over a wall you are greeted by this gem. Welcome to my secret, not-so-secret spot in the city:


It's exactly what I need when I'm attempting to relax. I sit and look up at the buildings that tower over me, then look directly in front and get a straight shot down town. It's abandoned and has character. Everything at that height is calm. It seems peaceful even with all the chaos below. Magic.
I need to learn balance. I'm terrible at it. I move 150mph at everything. Work hard, play hard. I don't know how to just sit and be. Relaxing is something I fail it.
I try meditating, but become so frustrated that I YouTube how-to videos on the entire process. I try sitting and watching a movie, but am constantly Wikipedia-ing random facts and things that were happening in the story line. It's the feeling of not being productive that really makes me angry. Hmm… maybe it's also the fucking internet. This constant connection.
As I'm writing this I'm watching 2012. Preparing for earthquakes. Let the anxiety roll!
So, I'm breaking that connection.
Next Thursday we leave for Paris . We arrive in the late evening on Friday (4-9th). After that is Barcelona (9-14). What should we do? Places that I have to see? Are there any shows? Help me.
Lastly, here is Zoetica and I with drewyoon's dog at my place a few weeks ago.

This summer is going to be fantastic.
.
- It was Cosi's birthday Friday.
- We went to see Hole. By Hole I mean, Courtney Love. Same old thing just a new backing band?


- I was standing there and realized how good her boobs looked. I made it clear that if I were to get implants I would want to go and see her doctor. That explains this special picture...

- We found gold deer and had no choice but to sit on them.



- We wandered down the street to drink.
- We drank too much.
- I was probably being inappropriate and disrespectful. I only say this because Dot and Cosi were.
- my friends are so great. 75% of gifts were All Saints related. (Zoetica is to blame for that obsession and a beautiful new necklace!).


- My friend Mike gave me a pre-written letter of apology for Saturday nights festivities (our joint birthday party).

- I smashed a cupcake in Cosi's face.
- She got upset.
- We went to watch girls dance in bikinis.
- I got a lap dance from my favorite girl ever.
- I told her she had to stop because I adored her too much and would try to molest her.
- She said it was okay.
- I froze.
- I woke up this morning feeling gross. with scratches on my arm and one on my face.
- My life is 95% work, however you just got a dose of the funs.

oh and i think about earthquakes far too often. i'd like to move.
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