Really?

REALLY???

After over three years, someone decided to anonymously renew my membership to this site? Is this some sort of crafty marketing scheme or does someone really LUV me?

Either way, I'll take it. I haven't looked at these pics and blogs so long. It's really quite nostalgic. Anyway, I'll probably mess around with this site more later, but right now I'm going running.

XOxoXox

Fall is great.

I started my classes this week. It's always nice to be in the DePaul area in the fall. Besides the yuppie-ish neighborhood, it's really pretty and the streets are busy with people going back to school or going to school for the first time. It's kind of annoying at times, but its exciting too. The weather is perfect today - just cool enough to wear a light jacket. I'm at work, but it's surprisingly slow for a Saturday. I'm up here with my best girl Cassie so that's always good. I haven't blogged in a really long time, so I thought I'd do a little update.

I don't know what fall always makes me feel so good. I guess it's that feeling of a clean slate. That and the fashions! It's always fun to get out the turtlenecks and suit jackets and knee high boots and other fun items

I'm taking two classes. ENG 360 - American Lit to 1800 and an elective, ENG 379 "Chicago's One Book". I didn't know this, but this course was in the newspaper because it was developed around the city's "One Book" program. The book they selected this fall is "Interpreter of Maladies" by Jumpa Lahiri - an excellent collection of short stories that I read at the beginning of the summer. So I was pretty jazzed about that. We will basically be reading and discussing good modern literature, which is something I always like to do.

The other class, unfortunately, is not really something I'm not that interested in, but the prof is really funny so we'll see. She also seems to like me a lot. On the first day I blurted something about literature coming from a "special place" inside you (I really couldn't tell you why I said that, but if you're reading this you are probably used to random outbursts from me). Anyway, it was kind of embarrassing because after I said that she kept referring to it in some offhand way throughout class. And that wasn't the first time either.

I'm starting to think about when the next Ephemera Festival should be. It's a tough decision because I want to have it in the Spring when there aren't many craft fairs, but that is going to be the quarter that I student teach. Yes, it's that soon. I can't even get my mind around it right now. So I may have to do it sooner than Spring or put it on hold. Either way, there's going to be some planning soon. Maybe some of you DIYers or zinesters can get back to me and tell me when works best for you. Either way, I'll be posting a bulletin soon.

Lastly, I just want to comment on the fact that I am addicted to watching Unsolved Mysteries on DVD. Actually, starguitar and I both are, We recently talked about the fact that we have most of the "Ghosts" segments memorized, which just proves how cool we really are. We have "Bizarre Murders" and "Ghosts" and I just ordered the "UFOs" collection. I can't wait!

Alright, I'm halfway through my work day. Way to go, me!

Over the past year or so, SG has gotten really boring. There is now such a thing as a recognizable "typical" suicide girl, which in my opinion defeats the purpose of the site. I can understand how this form of branding happens - when there's money to be made, it becomes important to find a niche. Also, since its no longer possible to scroll through my friends' new blogs, much of the community aspect of the site (which was the reason i continued to keep my membership) is no longer there. In short, SG is no longer worth $48 a year.

That's what I wrote in the comments box when I cancelled my account today. The weird thing is, I got two messages - one saying my account will be cancelled next May (which is when I renewed) and one saying it will be cancelled today. Does anyone know why this is?

i had a weekend of sloth and it was the best!! my weekends (monday/tuesday) are usually consumed with everything i couldn't do while i was working, but this was an exception. there was an extreme heat warning and i'm not a hot weather person as it is, so i decided that i would hang out in the AC and do absolutely nothing. as it turned out, starguitar was free too, so i basically spent the weekend at his place hanging out. we watched the village (creepy!), the last of six feet under (season 3 i think?) strangers with candy (of course) and several other things i don't remember. we also ate delicious sushi and ben and jerry's american pie ice cream. then he played really cheesy songs on piano and i sang the words. i yelled out songs like "heal the world" and "from a distance" and he looked up the chords online and played them. shut up - you wish you were there! and this afternoon i got up and went to the gym for a swim and a workout, and then to work for the rest of the evening. there's something really gratifying about working out hard after doing next to nothing for a few days. there's only a few more weeks of summer and then it's back to school to take my remaining FIVE CLASSES. i'm so ready to have a real career. i've also (gasp!) been working on my ZINE as of late. it's shamefully overdue (as usual) but at least i never completely stop working on it. i don't think i even need to mention how good it feels to be writing for it.

this weekend - halsted street market days! who wants to meet up?

Last night Helen came over. We don't get to see each other too often these days due to conflicting schedules, but she's my bestest friend and I'm happy to see her whenever I can. She brought me a couple of presents, including a very fabulous black and silver maribou boa. So after she left I did what I often do - take pictures of myself in my apartment just for fun. Except this time, I figured out a really cool effect that I can do with my camera. So I played with it, trying out different light sources and angles. The results are below.

Sweet Jeepers, look at this site. Tags for the sets? Good job, SG. Maybe I’ll stick around here a little longer.

Yesterday Starguitar and I went to the lake. It was actually his first time there since he moved to Chicago a year ago. While we were there, he said “I have a present for you.” He took an envelope out of his bag and handed it to me. To my TOTAL shock and excitement, it was an itinerary for a trip to Vegas in August!! He bought it for us to celebrate our two-year anniversary. I was so completely taken by surprise that I almost cried. I haven’t had a real vacation in so many years and trust me, I need it. It’s going to fucking rock, I’m so excited!!!

Work has been kicking my ass. I swear, I don’t even know how I put up with that place, but somewhere deep inside I must like it, cause it’s my choice to come back. Dealing with a completely new software system and a renovation for the past 3 months has really created a lot of extra pressure. In fact, I had a bit of a breakdown Thursday night. It was one of those days where fucked-up things kept happening over and over again. It ended with my having to stay an hour and a half later to correct a day’s worth of paperwork. I had plans to hang out with Beth and Daniel and a few friends at the Darkroom later that night. When I finally got there two hours later than I was supposed to, there was a long line at the door, and something just snapped. Keeping your emotions bottled up (as one has to do at work) is a surefire way to explode later, and that is exactly what happened. Seeing my friends was the one thing I was looking forward to all day, and I just lost it. I tried to call Beth and tell her there was a line, and all of the sudden I started crying uncontrollably. Not just crying but shaking, convulsing, my vision was distorted. I felt like screaming, but I forced myself to at least control that. I freaked myself (and Dan) out a little, I’m sure, but once I let it all out, I was fine. The next day was a beautiful one spent hanging out with my lovely, wonderful, amazing boy, learning about the trip, watching Queer as Folk while smoking and snuggling. It proved to be just the thing I needed to bounce back.