Well... I think I need to vent.... It's been a hell of a year... and I am having trouble feeling happy... The person I thought I was going to be with forever got married a week after I moved out of the house... The girl I started seeing went back to her abusive boyfriend... Ohh let's not forget the fact I have feelings for my best friend, and she and I are ever so happy together.... Yet she is in a relationship.... This has been one Fucked up year, and it's getting hard to want to keep moving on.... Well, a new college is in the horizon..... I should know where soon, I guess that is nice.... Well... I hope everyone survives the apocalypse....... Goodnight Suicide Girls..... Good night
James
James
I am in love with a girl, who is/ has been abused. She doesn't know how to leave, and it kills me. I would step in, but she would not be happy with me.... I am utterly confused, frightened, and depressed. All I want to do is show her what real love is, hold her, be with her, and grow... What can I do? nothing I suppose. This isn't something I can do for her, I wish I could, but I know its going to be when she is ready.... I just wish I could have more patience.... She is such a sweet person, who deserves to be treated as none other.... I know I am not a rich man, but I would do my best to show her how wonderful she is.
Reflective mood.... What makes a man great, opposed to that of a a terrible man? I suppose, a lot of it has to do with whats important to each. A bad person relies on how people can better them, while a good person worries how they can benefit others. A great person, goes above and beyond, and tries to not only help those in their life, but to better the lives of humanity. Control, deception, and
fear are the tools of a ill minded person, counterpoint to that is the tools of the great man, Understanding, tolerance, and love. A great man does not judge his greatness, people around him do, while the other will judge their greatness and belittle others accomplishments. I know I am no great man, but one day I hope people will look back, and say.... "You remember that James guy? He was ok"
Goodnight Suicide girls...... Good night
fear are the tools of a ill minded person, counterpoint to that is the tools of the great man, Understanding, tolerance, and love. A great man does not judge his greatness, people around him do, while the other will judge their greatness and belittle others accomplishments. I know I am no great man, but one day I hope people will look back, and say.... "You remember that James guy? He was ok"
Goodnight Suicide girls...... Good night
Twenty seven
by James Paul Salamone:
27 times I have tried to feel alive
26 more days, I have to unwind.
25 are the images that flash in my mind
24 are the reasons I can and I try
23 is a number that's close to my heart
22 is a symbol of time spent apart.
21 was too crazy, and misunderstood.
20 is how and why I am who I am
19 was something that resembles a scam
18 are the times I want to look back
17 makes me laugh and cry all the same
16 ways to to figure how to shift all the blame.
15 memories of you in my mind
14 was alone all the time
13 silent tears I have wiped from my face
12 steps left till I fall from my grace
11 smiles, and glances I have caught with my eye
10 I remember how it is to get by
9 for the times I wanted to tell
8 is a number that puts me through hell
7 meanings to one word I hold close to heart
6 was where my life fell apart
5 makes me wish I could talk all night long
4 ways to write a crappy love song
3 is too many and
2 is just right...
1 is how I am feeling tonight
by James Paul Salamone:
27 times I have tried to feel alive
26 more days, I have to unwind.
25 are the images that flash in my mind
24 are the reasons I can and I try
23 is a number that's close to my heart
22 is a symbol of time spent apart.
21 was too crazy, and misunderstood.
20 is how and why I am who I am
19 was something that resembles a scam
18 are the times I want to look back
17 makes me laugh and cry all the same
16 ways to to figure how to shift all the blame.
15 memories of you in my mind
14 was alone all the time
13 silent tears I have wiped from my face
12 steps left till I fall from my grace
11 smiles, and glances I have caught with my eye
10 I remember how it is to get by
9 for the times I wanted to tell
8 is a number that puts me through hell
7 meanings to one word I hold close to heart
6 was where my life fell apart
5 makes me wish I could talk all night long
4 ways to write a crappy love song
3 is too many and
2 is just right...
1 is how I am feeling tonight
Why do I shake my head?
Could it be that things will change?
The things I think, The way I feel,
The songs I sing, The ache within.
The casual glance, the sadness flood,
The thoughts within reverberate.
I am hopeless, I am no saint.
I see your smile, I see your eyes.
They cast upon me, with lovers haste....
Yet I know, I cannot push.
The reasons seem to overflow,
Your face and voice within my mind....
You will never ever let it go,
Myself and you will never be,
Unless you leave and give chance.
The thoughts I think
The meanings why?
The songs I sing....
The want to cry.....
So many reasons why I shake my head....
Too many now, I'm off to bed....
-In and out of thoughts I wander,
Over and under imagination I ponder....
I am Eternally sorry for all I have done....
To me you are the Stars.... the moon... you are my Sun....
I CAME..... I SAW..... I'm now depressed.....
BLESSED BE......JPS-
Could it be that things will change?
The things I think, The way I feel,
The songs I sing, The ache within.
The casual glance, the sadness flood,
The thoughts within reverberate.
I am hopeless, I am no saint.
I see your smile, I see your eyes.
They cast upon me, with lovers haste....
Yet I know, I cannot push.
The reasons seem to overflow,
Your face and voice within my mind....
You will never ever let it go,
Myself and you will never be,
Unless you leave and give chance.
The thoughts I think
The meanings why?
The songs I sing....
The want to cry.....
So many reasons why I shake my head....
Too many now, I'm off to bed....
-In and out of thoughts I wander,
Over and under imagination I ponder....
I am Eternally sorry for all I have done....
To me you are the Stars.... the moon... you are my Sun....
I CAME..... I SAW..... I'm now depressed.....
BLESSED BE......JPS-
Untitled thoughts:
Entering my subconscious as I wither away
Looking for something that seems lost.
Trying to subdue the person I was,
Only to ruin the person I have become.
Under another set of stars I stare,
Looking for reasons why.
The problems set into dust,
That settles inside my brain.
An illusion of you that pulls on my heart,
keeps telling me that we will be one.
The taunting keeps my heart strung,
While my soul begs to release.
The tangled web of consciousness,
settles upon these thoughts.
Neural impulses trigger response,
your face.... I cannot stop.
Temped by the thoughts to leave,
my heart wretches out.
The voice within me cries out in pain,
Darkness settles in, and nothingness calms my heart.
-end-
-In and out of thoughts I wander,
Over and under imagination I ponder....
I am Eternally sorry for all I have done....
To me you are the Stars.... the moon... you are my Sun....
I CAME..... I SAW..... I'm now depressed.....
BLESSED BE......JPS-
Entering my subconscious as I wither away
Looking for something that seems lost.
Trying to subdue the person I was,
Only to ruin the person I have become.
Under another set of stars I stare,
Looking for reasons why.
The problems set into dust,
That settles inside my brain.
An illusion of you that pulls on my heart,
keeps telling me that we will be one.
The taunting keeps my heart strung,
While my soul begs to release.
The tangled web of consciousness,
settles upon these thoughts.
Neural impulses trigger response,
your face.... I cannot stop.
Temped by the thoughts to leave,
my heart wretches out.
The voice within me cries out in pain,
Darkness settles in, and nothingness calms my heart.
-end-
-In and out of thoughts I wander,
Over and under imagination I ponder....
I am Eternally sorry for all I have done....
To me you are the Stars.... the moon... you are my Sun....
I CAME..... I SAW..... I'm now depressed.....
BLESSED BE......JPS-
Alliteration:
Silently sitting surveying serendipitous shadows sailing soundly through trails that thoughts thoroughly transcend tripping, bumbling, breaking boundaries burnt boughs burn brightly as another amiable actor amplifies audacious abjuratory memories making mountainous mistakes, misunderstood maladies morphing language linguistics, lingering lament limping lamely.... Loosely within what was within woes wanderings wholeheartedly pivoting precariously providing pondering provocatively pinning profound integrity. Intriguingly intrinsic interludes interwoven in innovation finding finally, forlorn fumbling fantastic feelings fulfill counterpoint contemptuously calling, coming close crying caressing nothing notable. Nonetheless nodding nonsense nonchalantly narrating, one oratorical omniscient oversight odiously overwrites order.
In my mind these thoughts consume me, unrelenting anxiety and fear seem oppressive.... Good night Suicide girls... goodnight
Silently sitting surveying serendipitous shadows sailing soundly through trails that thoughts thoroughly transcend tripping, bumbling, breaking boundaries burnt boughs burn brightly as another amiable actor amplifies audacious abjuratory memories making mountainous mistakes, misunderstood maladies morphing language linguistics, lingering lament limping lamely.... Loosely within what was within woes wanderings wholeheartedly pivoting precariously providing pondering provocatively pinning profound integrity. Intriguingly intrinsic interludes interwoven in innovation finding finally, forlorn fumbling fantastic feelings fulfill counterpoint contemptuously calling, coming close crying caressing nothing notable. Nonetheless nodding nonsense nonchalantly narrating, one oratorical omniscient oversight odiously overwrites order.
In my mind these thoughts consume me, unrelenting anxiety and fear seem oppressive.... Good night Suicide girls... goodnight
Lessons learned.... Do not fiddle with your phone at 10pm while driving in a small town.... No matter that you haven't drank, you still go through the field sobriety tests.... Luckily the police officer was nice enough to not ticket me for fiddling with my phone..... Good night Suicide girls 
Things are not going so well lately. I am becoming more and more depressed as this week goes on. I hate to use this as a diatribe to sit on this soap box and spout out sadness, but I am running out of options for any sort of outlet for my doldrums. Well, I will cut this short I just needed to identify that I was sad, Sorry for anyone who actually takes time to read this.....
In and out of thoughts I wander,
Over and under imagination I ponder,
I am eternally sorry for all I have done......
To me you are the Stars...... The moon...... You are my sun.....
I CAME...... I SAW...... I'm now depressed.....
Blessed Be
JPS
In and out of thoughts I wander,
Over and under imagination I ponder,
I am eternally sorry for all I have done......
To me you are the Stars...... The moon...... You are my sun.....
I CAME...... I SAW...... I'm now depressed.....
Blessed Be
JPS
